Flashlight
by Elohcin Rayne
Summary: Set during New Moon. Bella has been feeling her way through the darkness for months. When an unexpected savior enters her life will he be what she needs to pull her back into the light?
1. Chapter 1

The tires of my old truck squealed against the wet pavement of the hospital parking lot as I slammed on my breaks. I threw it in park and flew out of the cab and through the doors that lead to the emergency room. If I had been in a better state of mind I would have been proud of myself for not tripping over my own feet as I ran inside.

The nurse at the desk looked up as I bolted through the door. She knew who I was and why I was here. She picked up the phone on her desk and held a finger up gesturing for me to wait as she dialed.

"Dr. Gerandy, Isabella Swan has just arrived."

She paused for a moment before saying "Yes, sir" and hung up the phone.

"Isabella, come with me please, sweetheart."

She led me through the big double doors that I knew would take us back to the patient rooms. She stopped outside of a small waiting room and gestured for me to enter.

"Dr. Gerandy will be right down. Just sit tight for a minute. Can I get you anything? Water? Coffee?"

I shook my head, confused as to why I was brought here instead of directly to Charlie. The only explanation I would allow myself to think was that he was in surgery or had been taken down for testing or something. I refused to think there was another possibility.

Dr. Gerandy entered the room a few short minutes later. He looked exhausted and when he looked at me I saw something in his eyes that caused my heart to stop before beginning to beat rapidly against my ribcage; almost as though it was trying to break free.

He took a seat beside me on the small sofa and let out a deep sigh.

"I'm sorry Isabella, but I have some bad news."

The tears started to well up in my eyes so quickly I didn't even realize they were there until they started falling. I almost stopped him since I had a pretty good idea what he was going to say, but I couldn't speak. It was like my brain needed to confirm what my heart already knew.

"As you already know, your father was in an accident. His cruiser was spotted by a trucker down near Bogachiel State Park, crashed into a tree. We're not exactly sure what happened since the officers that responded to the call didn't find any evidence of another car, so we can only surmise that he may have swerved to keep from hitting an animal and lost control of the car."

I let out a breath that I hadn't realized I had been holding. While this was bad it didn't necessarily mean he was… God I couldn't even think the word.

"So, can I see him?" I asked.

I couldn't help but notice the intense sadness in the good doctor's eyes as he took another deep breath.

"Honey, there's more. He had a wound from where he must have hit his head on the steering wheel. The blood must have attracted some of the animals in the forest…"

I held my hand up not needing him to finish. I didn't need nor want any of the details.

"So what is it that you're saying?" Stupid question I know, but my mind just didn't want to accept the implications of his words.

"I'm so sorry Bella. There was nothing we could do. He's gone, honey."

I just looked at him. I heard the words but my mind refused to let them sink in. This wasn't happening. This _couldn't_ be happening. Not Charlie. Not after everything I've lost. No, I refused to believe that God would take away the only person I had left.

"I wanna see for myself."

The words came out before I had the chance to even realize I was speaking. I spoke them so quietly I wasn't sure that he heard me.

"Bella, I don't think that's such a good idea. We had one of the officers officially identify the body, so there's really no need…"

"I want to see for myself," I stated again, only this time I spoke loud enough and with enough force behind my words to let him know that there was no room for argument.

"Okay, honey. But I need to warn you, the wounds on his neck will be visible and they are not pleasant."

I simply nodded. I really didn't care. I just needed to see.

I stood outside the closed door of Charlie's hospital room trying to work up the courage to open it. After a few minutes and a silent pep talk, I reached for the handle and opened the door.

I half expected him to be completely covered in his own blood. It was obvious that they had cleaned him up. But still, the sight before me caused my knees to go weak and I gripped the handle of the door for dear life to hold myself up. I could see from the doorway just how bad his neck wounds were and it made my stomach turn. If his neck was that bad I couldn't even begin to imagine what was _under_ the sheet.

Without taking my eyes off of the man in front of me I spoke to Dr. Gerandy, feeling him still standing behind me.

"Could I have a few minutes alone with him? So I can say good-bye?"

"Yes, sweetie, of course."

I stepped further into the room and closed the door behind me before making my way over to the bed. I sat down in the hard plastic chair beside him and gently took his hand in my own. I began rubbing small circles over his cold skin as I took in the sight of my dead father.

There were no scratches or marks on his face other than the small cut on his forehead that Dr. Gerandy had told me about. I moved the sheet down a little bit further to get a better look at his neck. My suspicions were confirmed as I looked closer. You would never notice unless you were looking for it, but the marks on the right side looked suspiciously like human teeth marks. The skin around the wound had been torn in places to cover this up, but I could still make out the edges of the original bite mark.

Charlie had been killed by a vampire.

I closed my eyes tightly as the tears began to fall. They ran out so rapidly that wiping them away would be futile as they would only be replaced by new ones in mere seconds.

This felt like a dream. A part of me, the part that was in serious denial, was telling me that this wasn't real. It was telling me that when I opened my eyes I would awake in my bed at home and that none of this really happened.

After what felt like an eternity, I finally pried my eyelids open, letting out a choked sob as I did so.

This wasn't a dream. I was not at home in bed as I had hoped to be. Instead I was right where I was when I closed my eyes. In the hospital room that had all of a sudden become entirely too small. It felt like the walls were rapidly closing in on me and I was having trouble catching my breath.

" _I'm so sorry Bella. There was nothing we could do. He's gone, honey."_

 _He's gone._

 _He's gone._

 _He's gone._

Those two words played again and again inside my head as the room got smaller and smaller. My chest heaved as I tried, without much success, to take in the air that my lungs were so desperately begging me for.

I tried my best to calm my breathing but it did no good.

The only person that could calm me was lying lifeless in the hospital bed next to me.

 _He's gone._

I crawled into the bed, wrapping my arms as tightly as I could around the already cold body of my father and sobbed into his chest. My sobs became uncontrollable as the reality of what was going on finally hit me.

His chest wasn't rising and falling with each inhale and exhale. He wasn't breathing.

I couldn't hear the beat of his heart with the ear that was pressed to his chest, or feel it on my cheek. His heart wasn't beating.

I couldn't feel the warmth of his skin as I held onto his body tighter than I ever had. He was cold.

He wouldn't open his eyes, no matter how much I begged him to. He was gone.

Just like everyone else I loved, he was taken away from me.

"I love you, Daddy." I whispered through my sobs. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

The guilt consumed me. I knew that this was my fault. While I could never bring myself to regret my time with the Cullens, I couldn't help but think that if I had just left well enough alone when it came to _him_ , if I would have taken his advice and stayed away, none of this would have happened.

I wouldn't have been out in that field with them that day when the attention of a coven of nomadic vampires was caught by a baseball game.

If it weren't for me, the Cullens would have never had to kill James in an attempt to protect someone they had considered family.

If I had just stayed in Phoenix there wouldn't be a psychotic vampire on the loose, hell bent on ending my life, and anyone else's that got in her way, to avenge the death of her mate.

It was my fault that Charlie got caught in the crossfire and I didn't know if I would ever be able to forgive myself for that.

I couldn't be sure that it was, in fact, Victoria that had murdered my dad. There was always the off chance that another vampire had been making his or her way through the area and Charlie had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was doubtful, but possible.

After what felt like hours, my sobs had quieted but I still held tightly to Charlie, scared to let go. I had to though. There were things I needed to do. I had phone calls to make and arrangements needed to be made.

I pulled myself up off the bed but I didn't move. I willed my feet to carry me out of that room but they wouldn't listen. It took another ten minutes and one more silent pep talk before my body finally did what I told it to.

I leaned down and pressed my lips lightly to Charlie's cold cheek and whispered my love for him once again before leaving the room.

I was on autopilot as I drove home from the hospital. After my mini breakdown in Charlie's room a numb feeling had washed over me. I was grateful for it. I didn't want to feel the pain that I knew lay just below the surface. It would come eventually. I had enough experience in this sort of thing to know that, but it would have to wait. There was too much to do.

I pulled into the driveway and killed the engine. I just sat there, not thinking, not feeling. Just sitting. I didn't want to go in there yet. In fact, I didn't want to go in there at all.

After a few minutes I decided that it was best to just go in and get it over with. I couldn't sit out here in the driveway forever; though the thought was much more pleasant than the alternative.

I noticed that the door was cracked open slightly, but in my haste to get out of here and to Charlie earlier, I couldn't remember if I had closed it all the way.

Of course it would be just my luck that on a day like today someone would choose to break into the home of the chief of police.

I pushed the door open further and peered inside. It didn't seem like there was anything out of the ordinary from this vantage point, so I stepped inside.

I listened intently to see if I could hear voices or footsteps indicating that there was someone inside, but I heard nothing. It was completely silent in the house. Not that that meant there was no one here. They could have just heard my truck and were being quiet so that they didn't get caught.

Honestly I didn't care. If we actually had anything of value they were welcome to it. I had already been robbed of the most valuable thing that had ever occupied space in this house.

I slowly and quietly made my way upstairs. I felt that if I made too much noise I would be disturbing something, so I remained as silent as possible. I had every intention of going to shower. I wasn't sure why but I felt the need to scrub my skin until it bled.

Just as I was about to step inside the bathroom, Charlie's open bedroom door caught my attention.

Standing in the doorway, I just stared. His pajamas were still lying at the foot of his unmade bed. His closet door was open a crack from where he had taken his clean uniform out this morning. He never closed the closet door all the way. I cracked a small, sad smile as I remembered asking him about it once when I was little.

I had been terrified of monsters as a child. I believed that any place in the house where light was scarce was full of monsters. I had been about seven when Charlie helped me overcome that fear.

 _I was sitting on Dad's bed watching him put away his clean clothes. He hung up the last shirt but didn't close the door all the way._

" _Daddy, you should close that. If not then the monsters will come out at night while you're sleeping and get you."_

 _He chuckled and sat down on the bed beside me._

" _Still scared of the closet monster, baby?" he asked, brushing the hair out of my eyes._

 _I nodded and looked back at the closet warily._

" _And the under-the-bed-monsters. Don't forget them. They're even worse than the closet monsters 'cause they're sneakier. They can grab your feet when you get in or out of bed and pull you under."_

 _He chuckled again and shook his head._

" _Aren't you scared?" I asked._

 _He shook his head again._

" _I have no reason be scared. There's nothing in there but clothes and shoes and boxes of old junk. There are no monsters in there."_

" _How do you know? They could just be hiding from you. Then tonight when you go to sleep they'll jump out and take you away from me."_

 _The thought had brought tears to my eyes. I loved my Daddy and I didn't want anyone to take him away from me._

" _Hey," he said as he used his fingertips to lift my chin so I would look at him. "You don't need to worry about that. I have something that keeps the monsters away."_

 _He smiled and leaned over toward his bedside table. He opened the drawer and pulled out a spray can and handed it to me._

" _This is for you," he said._

 _I looked at the can, studying the label. There was a picture of a big, green, scary-looking monster with red eyes and huge, pointy teeth. There was a red circle around the picture with a line that ran diagonal across the monster. I rotated the can in my hand and read the back. It said 'Monster Spray: To keep the scary closet and under-the-bed-monsters away'._

" _Where did you get this?" I asked in awe. I shouldn't have been surprised he would find something like this. Daddy always kept me safe._

" _I made it. I didn't want you to be scared anymore."_

" _How does it work?" I asked._

" _You just spray it in the closet and under the bed, or anywhere else you think a monster might lurk."_

 _I got up from the bed and went over to daddy's closet. I opened the door as wide as I could and sprayed every inch down with the monster spray. No way were the monsters gonna get him tonight._

 _I walked over to the bed and dropped to my knees. I pulled the bed skirt up and repeated the process._

" _It smells pretty" I told him with a smile._

 _He returned my smile as I climbed back up onto the bed._

" _That's what keeps the monsters away. They don't like the pretty smell. So tonight, when you go to bed, we'll take this and spray your room for monsters. Then neither of us will have to worry about monsters coming to steal us away from each other. Okay?"_

 _I smiled again and hugged him._

" _Okay, Daddy. Thank you for keeping me safe."_

 _He pulled away and smiled, running the back of his fingers over my small cheek._

" _Always, Bells. I'll always keep you safe."_

I had eventually learned that dad's 'Monster Spray' was nothing but a can of air freshener. He had made the label himself and taped it to the can to cover the original one. He had become my hero that day. I was never scared of the closet monster or under-the-bed-monster again.

Tears were again streaming down my face as I stood at the foot of my dad's bed remembering.

I looked around the room some more just taking it all in. It smelled heavily of his cologne. A smell that I had always loved. He'd been wearing the same scent for as long as I could remember.

As I turned toward his dresser, I noticed the corner of a picture frame. The rest was covered by a t-shirt that he had thrown haphazardly.

I found it odd since there were no other picture frames anywhere in the room. In fact his walls were completely bare aside from a huge dream catcher that hung on the wall above his bed. It had been a gift from Billy. It was much like the one that Jake had given me for my birthday only on a much larger scale.

I pulled the t-shirt away and the photo staring back at me caused my breath to catch. It was a picture of _him_ and me from prom.

 _Why did he still have this?_

I figured that _he_ had taken it just like all the pictures from my scrapbook and the gifts from that fateful birthday party.

I realized that he must not have realized that Charlie had it. But even still, why would Charlie keep it? If there was anyone that didn't want a reminder of _him_ it was my dad.

I stood there for an immeasurable amount of time simply studying the perfect face of the man that I had been willing to give my very life for. It wasn't as hard to look upon him as I thought it might be, but then again it was just a picture. I would imagine that coming face to face with him in person would be a whole different experience.

It was hard to believe that it had only been five short months since they had left. Some days it seemed as though decades had passed and others it was as if it had been only yesterday that I stood on that path in the forest while _he_ tore out my very soul with his words.

As I gazed at the picture I realized why Charlie must have kept it. I looked happy. I was smiling brightly, my ever present blush adorning my cheeks. _He_ wasn't even looking at the camera. Instead his attention was focused on me. He had a small adoring smile on his face. The sight of it made the hole in my chest throb with such intensity it made my knees weak.

To the outside observer he looked like he was deeply in love with me. But I knew better.

I sighed deeply, taking one last look at the picture before replacing it on the dresser. I even went as far as to put the t-shirt back over it, just like I found it. I left the room closing the door behind me. I needed to get on the ball and start making the necessary phone calls to get things taken care of. If I stayed up here I'd never get any of that done.

I grabbed the phone off of the wall in the kitchen and headed toward the living room. I made a list in my head of the people that I needed to call.

 _Billy, funeral home… Who the hell else am I supposed to call?_

I had no idea what the hell I was doing. I found myself wishing, not for the first time today, that Esme and Carlisle were here. I needed the comfort that only a mother could give and I knew that Carlisle would know what the hell I was supposed to be doing.

The longing that I felt for my vampire parents caused a war inside my head. On the one hand I wanted…no needed… them here to help me through this. Even if it was just long enough to take care of everything and get through the funeral. The fact remained though that even if I had any idea of how to get in touch with them I wasn't sure I would be able to make that phone call. The pain of their abandonment was still pretty fresh and I didn't know if I could handle speaking to, let alone see, any of them right now.

On the other hand, I was angry with them and _didn'_ t want them here. They were partially responsible for this after all. They left me alone and unprotected while Victoria was plotting my demise. I didn't know if they had any idea that she would come back for me but that was beside the point. If they hadn't left they would have easily been able to take care of her before any of this happened and I wouldn't be parentless right now.

I let out a puff of frustrated air. There was no sense in thinking about this right now. The fact was they weren't here. Regardless of how much I did or didn't want them to be.

I hit the talk button on the phone, the dial tone loud in the otherwise silent room.

Just as I went to press the buttons to call Billy, I felt it. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and a chill ran up my spine. Someone was watching me.

I saw a flash of movement from the corner of my eye before she spoke.

"Hello, Bella."

I looked up toward the voice. I should have been scared. In fact, I probably should have been pissing myself in fear, but I felt nothing. I just didn't care anymore. There was no more fight left in me.

My voice sounded dead even to my own ears as I greeted my unwanted guest.

"Hello Victoria."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hello my lovely readers. Thank you to all of you who favorited/alerted this story. A special thanks to Cazzy20 and seablue4u for being the only two reviewers.**

 **This story is something I started a long time ago and I'm a bit out of practice with the whole writing thing so please bear with me. I have a few chapters written and I'm in the process of some edits before I continue on with the story. Enjoy chapter 2 :)**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

* * *

Victoria flashed a smile at me that was both beautiful and sinister at the same time. I knew the moment she realized her presence wasn't having the desired effect because the smile fell and a curious expression graced her beautiful face. Her head was cocked slightly to the side as she studied me.

"What's wrong, Bella?"

I almost laughed right in her face.

 _Is she seriously asking that right now?_

"Look, Victoria" I said. "If you're going to kill me, just fucking do it already." I wasn't in the mood to play her games.

She looked almost shocked at my outburst.

"Well, now that's no fun. It'll be so much better if I get to hear you beg for your pathetic human life."

This time I did laugh. Not just a small little giggle either. I'm talking full out, hysterical, 'holy-shit-I-think-I've-lost-my-mind', laughter. There was a good chance that that was entirely true. I mean come on. Experiencing all of the heartache and pain that I have in the last five months would make even the sanest person a bit mad.

The sudden noise from my laughter actually startled her a bit, as I saw her jump slightly. Again, had I been in my right mind I would have been proud of myself. It's not easy to startle a vampire.

My laughter died down and now I was just giggling. The look on her face indicated that she wasn't the least bit amused.

"You want me to beg?" I asked between giggles. "Beg for what exactly? It isn't like I have anything left to live for anyway. The man that you so adamantly like to claim is my mate left me over a fucking paper cut, taking with him the family that I had come to love as my own."

I was no longer giggling. With each word I spoke all of the anger, pain, loss, sorrow; every emotion that I had suppressed since the day _he_ left came bubbling to the surface. I had opened a floodgate and there was no hope of closing it. I was going to die anyway; I might as well let all of this out while I had the chance.

"None of the friends that I had made when I moved here want anything to do with me now because I alienated them when _he_ left.

"My mother and step-father were taken from me by some asshole that wasn't smart enough to _NOT_ get behind the wheel of a car when he was so intoxicated he couldn't even give the police his name when they took him in.

"And you personally took away the only other person that I had left that loved me and cared if I got out of bed every day. The only person that tried to convince me that even though I had been through so much in such a short time, that was no reason to stop living. So tell me, Victoria. Tell me what the fuck I'm supposed to beg for because I sure as hell refuse to beg for an empty life that I no longer want anyway."

I was breathing heavily when I finally finished my rant. I was so angry. There was still no fear though. I had just unleashed five months worth of pent up emotions on a vampire that wanted to kill me, yet I still wasn't scared.

She smiled that same beautiful, sinister smile.

"Yes, your mother and step-father's deaths were quite a stroke of luck. It saved me from having to travel all the way to Jacksonville to take care of them myself like I had originally planned. I should send that drunk driver a thank-you gift."

She was taunting me and I knew it, but I tried not to let it bother me. She just wanted a reaction from me and I refused to give her one.

"Whatever, so can we get to the killing now? If not then get out. I have things to do."

"Oh, no my dear Isabella, I have no intention of killing you quickly. While I will admit you have suffered greatly it isn't nearly enough. I plan to make your death extremely slow and excruciatingly painful. I will make you feel everything that I have felt since your pathetic excuse of a mate took mine away from me."

Okay, now I was starting to get a bit scared. I had no desire to be tortured for who knows how long. When I thought that she was just going to drain me and go on her merry way I was fine. The thought of facing what she had in store for me though… yeah, not so fine now.

She moved from her spot in my father's recliner faster than my poor human vision could detect. She was sitting behind me now, both of us stretched out on the sofa with my back to her chest. She held me tight enough to cause pain but not enough to break any bones.

"Did you know that your father begged, Isabella?" she whispered in my ear. "He begged me not to kill him. The man that so many in this town held in such high esteem begged little 'ol me to spare his life."

She reached down, grabbing the pinky of my left hand between her thumb and forefinger. She squeezed lightly at first and then slowly increased the pressure. I could hear and feel each bone as they broke individually beneath my skin. It hurt, it hurt like hell, but I refused to give her the satisfaction of hearing me scream out in pain.

"He tried to run. I didn't think that was very nice, so do you know what I did Bella?"

She moved on to the next finger, repeating the process of slowly breaking my bones.

"I broke his legs so he couldn't run from me. The bones snapped beneath my hands just as easily as a twig beneath the weight of a human foot. I love the sound of bones breaking. It's like music."

With that she grabbed the last three unbroken fingers on that hand and snapped them with ease. A small whimper escaped lips. I couldn't see her face, but it wasn't hard to imagine the sick, satisfied smile that the sound had no doubt caused.

"And then he shot me. Can you believe that, Bella? He actually shot me! Of course it didn't do anything to me physically, but my feelings were very hurt. I mean, you don't just go around shooting people. I don't live among humans but even _I_ know that's like some social faux pas. Very rude, indeed. Would you like to venture a guess as to what I did next?"

I shook my head. I had tears in my eyes as she painted me a very vivid picture of my father's last moments. He must have been so scared. If only the monster spray he had given me as a child worked on the real thing.

"Oh come now. You must have some idea. Guess."

I shook my head again. I didn't want to let her see me cry, but it was becoming harder and harder to hold the tears in.

"Well then I guess I'll just have to tell you. I stomped on his hand and crushed it. Then I took the gun and shot him back. Right… here."

She placed the tip of her finger just under my right clavicle, indicating that was where she had shot Charlie. She wasn't really pushing that hard, but with her strength it was enough. She pulled her hand away and I was glad that she hadn't decided to break the bone, though she had no doubt left a bruise. I had broken my collar bone once and that shit was painful. There was no way I would have been able to keep up this false bravado if she had broken that bone.

"Of course I had to take measures to avoid suspicion. I mean if the police found his dead body with a bullet wound then they would no doubt try to find whoever killed him. Not that they could find me, but still. No sense in wasting the time coming after someone they could never catch. So I fished the bullet out myself. He screamed out as I shoved my fingers into the hole. It gave me a warm tingly feeling all over to hear him scream like that."

She sighed happily as though she were remembering her fondest memory. It was disgusting and I wanted nothing more in that moment than to have the strength to rip her apart.

"His blood smelled so good" she continued. "I couldn't stop myself from draining him right then and there. He smelled sweet, similar to you. He tasted like I would imagine candy tastes to you humans. It's been a long time since I've fed on a human that tasted so good. It almost made me want to keep him alive so that I could feed on him over and over. Of course," she ducked her head toward my neck, dragging her tongued from the spot where my neck and shoulder met all the way up to my ear, "I would imagine that you are going to taste so much better."

I felt her smile against my skin as the tears that I had been holding in started to fall. There was nothing I could do to stop them. I couldn't stop the images she was creating of Charlie from flashing behind my closed eyes. I opened them but they were still there, burned into the forefront of my mind.

She stood up from her seat and stood in front of me.

"Now, I think it's time we go. We can't very well stay here. I would hate to be interrupted by those rancid wolves that seem so determined to protect you."

I couldn't move even if I wanted to. My ribs were killing me from her squeezing me so hard. They were definitely bruised if not one or two broken. The fingers she broke were throbbing and when I tried to roll my shoulder where she had poked me it felt like someone had shoved a hot blade into me. If this was just the beginning of the pain she planned to inflict I would stay right here thank you very much.

A loud crash brought my attention away from my inventory of my injuries. I turned my head toward the sound to see chunks of the back door lying in splinters on the floor from where someone, or something, had crashed through it. The next thing I knew the last member of the Cullen family I ever expected to see was crouched protectively in front of me snarling and growling at an equally shocked Victoria.

 _Had she been that focused on me that she didn't hear him coming?_

"I don't fuckin' think so, Victoria. You won't be takin' Bella anywhere" he drawled in a thick southern accent.

"Jasper?"


	3. Chapter 3

JPOV

I sat on the highest branch of the tallest tree I could find, just looking out over the snowy expanse of the Denali National Park. I had just finished hunting but I wasn't quite ready to head home yet. The emotional climate amongst my family had been depressing at best for the last five months and was showing no signs of changing anytime soon. I had taken to hunting alone after finding myself dry sobbing over a drained bear the last time I went with the rest of them.

Things had changed drastically for our family since moving here. The biggest being that Alice and I were no longer together.

We had known from the beginning that we weren't mates. Our love was never meant to last forever. That was something that we both knew going in. Once we had arrived in Alaska she had asked me to go for a hunt so that we could talk. She explained that it was time for us to separate, assuring me that it had nothing to do with what had happened at Bella's party. It was just time.

I really wasn't all that surprised. I had felt my feelings for Alice, and hers for me, begin to wane over the last few years. By the time we had moved to Forks my feelings were bordering on platonic. My love for her had become that which is shared between a brother and sister.

I had asked if she had seen a vision of my mate. She had simply smiled and told me that she wasn't ready yet, but when she was she'd let me know.

Since leaving Forks Emmett was no longer the jovial clown that we had all come to know and love. He tried on occasion to crack a joke or attempt to lighten the mood in the house, but his heart just wasn't in it. He missed his little sister far too much.

Esme and Carlisle mourned their daughter as though she had died. It wasn't an unusual occurrence to find Esme holed up in her room with her head buried in the pillows, sobbing so hard the whole bed shook. Carlisle spent most of his time in his study. He was just as melancholy as everyone else and I had caught him a few times just staring out the window with tears in his eyes, obviously thinking about Bella.

Alice was no longer the bright, bouncy, hyperactive pixie she had been. Not even shopping made her feel better, though she still continued to do it. She said that it gave her a sense of normalcy and that's what she needed right now.

On the outside, Rosalie remained indifferent. Her emotions told another story though. She missed Bella just like the rest of us did. She may not have particularly liked the girl, but Bella had made Rose's mate and her family happy. Any time Bella was mentioned I could feel a small amount of sisterly love from Rose. It was trumped by the annoyance she felt for the human, but I had every confidence that if Rose would have gotten over herself and just spent some time with Bella, she would have come to love her as strongly as Alice did.

Then there was Edward. He didn't even make it through the door of our house before he took off on his own. He said that he couldn't handle being around anyone and left. He checks in with Carlisle once every three weeks or so, but other than that we don't hear from him.

I personally felt that he just didn't want to witness the heartbreak that his dumbass actions caused.

None of us had agreed with Edward's decision to leave her. He argued that after what I had done it wasn't safe for her to be around us. I really couldn't argue there, but she was safer with us than she was on her own. The girl was a danger magnet. I mean come on. Within just a few months of moving to Forks she was nearly killed twice, not to mention raped. It didn't help that the poor thing tripped over thin air on an hourly basis. That didn't include the mishap on her birthday or the fact that Rose and I had every intention of killing her ourselves to minimize the risk of our family being exposed.

Yeah, still felt pretty guilty about that too.

In the end Carlisle had said it was ultimately Edward's decision to leave since she was his mate.

Mate my ass. If the she was really his mate he never would have been able to leave her. The pull between mates was far too strong to put any kind of real distance between them. He wouldn't have even made it to the Washington state line without collapsing from the pain of being away from her, let alone be able to travel to South America where he was now.

I was angry that he had just cast her aside so easily; though I had no clue why. I didn't really know her all that well. Because of my 'lack of control' I wasn't allowed to spend any length of time around the human my brother claimed he loved.

I had wanted to get to know her. In fact, I felt this _need_ to do so. Her emotions were mesmerizing to me. She felt everything with such intensity. It was as though she was feeling each emotion with her entire being and that fascinated me. I had never come across a human that experienced emotions the way that Bella did. I had only ever felt such intense feelings from other vampires.

Even though I had to keep my distance, it never stopped me from watching her interact with the rest of the family which gave me a little bit of insight into the human that everyone adored so much.

She was selfless. I could feel how much she loathed when Alice wanted to go shopping or play Bella Barbie, as she so affectionately called it, but she never complained. She would let out a frustrated huff every now and then, but never voiced her hatred of the activities. She was the first friend Alice had ever had and from where I was standing she was a damn good one.

She was witty. This was made obvious after listening to her banter back and forth with Emmett. He had a penchant for embarrassing her. He made it his own personal mission to make her blush at least once whenever she was at the house. He always achieved his goal but she took it in stride and was able to hold her own when it came to him. It was impressive to say the least.

She was fiery. I used to love to sit and listen to her debate with Carlisle about whatever topic. Even though he had more than three hundred fifty years on her, she had no problem arguing with him and making her opinion known. She was extremely intelligent and had left Carlisle speechless with her arguments more than once.

She loved unconditionally. Rose and I had never given her a reason to feel even friendly emotions toward us. Yes we had helped protect her from James, but she could have taken that as us just following orders from Carlisle.

Rose never tried to hide the fact that she wasn't fond of her. She avoided her like the plague when she could and never made any effort to get to know her on any level. She was far too self-centered for that.

I didn't exactly make an effort either. Even though I was asked to keep my distance I still could have joined in on a conversation or whatever activity was going on, but I didn't. In spite of all of that, she loved us. She loved us just as much as she loved Alice and Emmett.

She accepted all of us as we were, vampire and all, and loved us just as fiercely as she loved her human family; if not more.

As I continued to stare out over the trees, lost in my thoughts of Bella, I realized that I missed the human member of our family more than I ever thought I would.

As I thought back on all that I had learned about her from my observations I realized just what she meant to our family. Not only was she a sister, a best friend, a daughter, or a mate, she had given us back our sense of humanity. Her presence in our lives reminded all of us just why we had decided to become vegetarians. Why we chose to preserve life instead of take it away.

In that moment the anger that I had initially felt toward Edward for leaving her doubled. It took everything in me not to start running for Forks and beg for her forgiveness for us leaving her. To plead with her to allow us back into her life. To ask her to forgive _me_ for being at fault for all of this in the first place.

"Well, it looks like you'll be getting your chance."

I jumped at the sound of Alice's voice. I had been so lost in my thoughts I hadn't sensed her coming.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"We're going back to Forks. I had a vision and Bella needs us."

"Why? What's going on?"

"It's Charlie. Jazz, he's going to die."

While I was excited at the prospect of seeing Bella again and doing whatever she asked of me to earn her forgiveness, I was also heartbroken for her.

 _Not again._

Alice had relayed to the rest of just two months ago that she had had a vision of Bella and Charlie attending a funeral. She hadn't been able to see whose it was in the vision, but with a little internet searching we discovered that it was her mother and step-father's. Renee and Phil Dwyer had been killed in a car accident caused by a drunk driver.

We had anonymously sent flowers to the funeral but we were all wishing that we could have been there for her. Knowing that Charlie was there for her was the only thing that stopped Esme from going against Edward's wishes and heading for Forks.

"Did you see how it happens? Can we stop it?" I asked Alice.

"No, I didn't see how. We can't stop it. If the vision had come just an hour earlier there may have been a chance but it's too late."

I nodded, not exactly sure what to say.

"When are we leaving?"

"As soon as Carlisle gets home. He's on his way now. When I called him he said he was leaving right away, but even driving as fast as we do it'll take him about thirty minutes to get home. I told Esme that I'd help her pack so it goes faster, so I was hoping that maybe you would leave now. Jazz, she's all alone and I don't want her to be in that house all by herself any longer than she needs to be."

"You want _me_ to go?" I was incredulous.

They never wanted me within four feet of the girl and that's when they were there. Now she wants me to be by myself with her?

"Yes. You'll be able to help her better than any of the rest of us can."

 _Oh right… empath_.

"Are you sure that's such a good idea Alice? I mean, our last interaction wasn't exactly heartwarming."

"You'll be fine. You've done nothing but hunt and work on your control since we left Forks. Not to mention the rest of us haven't hunted in awhile and we'll need to do that before we see her again. That'll just take up even more time and I don't want her to be alone."

I was still sitting on my branch up in the tree and even from here I could see her eyes glisten with the venom tears that would never fall.

"Alright, I'll go."

She gave me a sad smile and picked up the small duffle bag that I hadn't noticed was sitting at her feet. I jumped down from the tree and she handed me the bag.

"Knew I was gonna say yes?"

"I had a feeling." She winked. "Okay, so I've seen you arrive in Forks not too long after she is told of Charlie's death. Beyond that I haven't seen anything since no decisions have been made."

I nodded. She reached up on the very tips of her toes and kissed my cheek and then turned to head back to the house.

I pulled the strap of the bag over my shoulder, turned myself in the right direction and started running toward Forks.

It seemed to take forever, but I finally made it to Forks. I didn't bother stopping at the house. I went straight to Bella's. When I was within range of the house. I stopped dead in my tracks. I could feel Bella's emotions and she was terrified. She was also in a lot of pain, both physical and emotional. I reached out to see if there was anyone else there. I could feel seething hatred mixed in with amusement and some sadness. Whoever was in that house with her did not like Bella at all.

It took only a second for me to realize exactly who that was.

I took off running again, my legs carrying me faster than they ever had before. Sooner than I expected I found myself in Bella's backyard. I could hear Victoria talking. She was telling Bella that it was time to go and something about wolves.

In the blink of an eye I had busted through the back door, not even bothering with trying to open it. I took a protective stance in front of Bella, a loud growl ripping through my chest as my eyes landed on Victoria.

She was surprised to see me. Which I found odd. She should have been able to hear me coming. Apparently she was too wrapped up in whatever she had been doing to Bella to notice.

I wanted to check on Bella to make sure she was okay. I knew she had been hurt since I was able to feel her pain, but she wasn't bleeding so I knew she would be okay until I took care of Victoria.

"I don't fuckin' think so, Victoria. You won't be takin' Bella anywhere."

I registered Bella's surprise when she realized it was me crouched in front of her.

"Jasper?"

"It's alright, darlin'" I assured her without taking my eyes off of Victoria.

I reached back and found her hand with mine, squeezing it lightly to comfort her as best I could right now.

"I won't let her hurt you. Everyone's on their way."

I was hit hard with an overwhelming amount of panic. Oddly enough it came from both Bella and Victoria.

"Oh, you didn't think I was alone did you?" I asked Victoria.

Okay, so yeah I was bluffing. It was a two day drive from here to our home in Alaska. Even driving the way vampires do the rest of the family still wouldn't be here until sometime tomorrow afternoon. But she didn't need to know that.

In a move so fast even I almost missed it, Victoria took off out the open front door.

 _Christ she's fast!_

With a growl I started after her. I followed her scent all the way to the Quileute border which she had crossed and I couldn't follow.

"FUCK!" I screamed.

 _Stupid fucking wolves and their piece of shit treaty!_

Victoria had mentioned wolves when she was talking to Bella, so I could only hope that she meant the Quileutes were shifting again. Also that they were on alert and got to her before she took off into the ocean or managed to get too far away by land.

I could have stayed here pacing the border, hoping one of them smelled me and came running, but I needed to get back to Bella. I didn't want to risk Victoria doubling back and getting to Bella before I got there.

I entered Bella's house through the still open front door to find her sitting just where I had left her. She was staring at the spot where I had been crouched in front of her. I wasn't getting much from her emotions now. I could feel a tiny bit of disbelief but other than that there was nothing. It was like she had turned them off.

I approached her at a human pace so as not to startle her. I crouched down in front of her and ducked my head so I could catch her gaze.

"Bella? Are you alright, darlin'?"

 _Why the fuck do I keep calling her that?_

"Jasper?" She asked for the second time.

"Yeah, it's me sugar. You alright?"

I internally rolled my eyes at myself.

 _Sugar now? Really?_

She didn't answer and given that I couldn't read her emotions I was getting worried. She just stared.

I was getting ready to open my mouth to try to get her to respond when she finally did.

"Jasper!" she cried. It wasn't a question this time. She launched herself at me and wrapped her arms around me in what would have been considered a bone crushing hug to another human. It didn't last long though. I felt a bit of embarrassment from her before it morphed into anger.

She pulled away just as quickly as she had come at me. I noticed her wince but filed that away for later. She looked me right in the eye and what I saw actually made me flinch.

I had seen her angry kitten face before and found it absolutely adorable. This however was anything but. The absolute rage in her eyes would have had a lesser man, vampire even, cowering in fear.

She narrowed her eyes slightly as she looked at me and I flinched again.

 _Give me a fucking break! You're a damned vampire. She's a human. What's she gonna do?_

So my inner voice had a point but that didn't change the fact that she was pretty pissed off and her anger was all directed at me.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" she gritted out through her teeth.

"Uhhh…"


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello, lovelies! Just a quick thank you to those of you that reviewed the last chapter and a hello to my new followers! Also, since I haven't mentioned this before, I don't have a beta so all mistakes you may find are mine. I read and reread each chapter multiple times before posting but I can't always catch every mistake. I hope you all enjoy chapter 4!**

BPOV

"Jasper?"

I immediately assumed he was just a figment of my imagination. It's not like this would be the first time I was in danger and it caused me to hallucinate. Then again it was always Edward before.

 _Well lookie here. I managed to not even wince at the mention of his name that time._

All thoughts that Jasper wasn't real were quickly thrown out as he reached his hand behind him and grabbed a hold of mine, lightly squeezing. I was glad he grabbed the one with the _not_ so broken fingers.

"It's alright darlin'. I won't let her hurt you. Everyone's on their way."

I swear I stopped breathing and panic flooded me.

 _They were coming? Was I ready to face the Cullen family again?_

I didn't think so but I guess I didn't really have a choice in the matter. I couldn't think about that now. There were more pressing matters at hand, like the possibility that I was about to die. I hoped that Jasper would be able to stop her from getting to me, but seeing as how I didn't really know Jasper all that well I had no clue if he would be able to take her out on his own.

"Oh, you didn't think I was alone, did you?" Jasper asked her.

If the look on Victoria's face was any indication, I wasn't the only one in a panic about the rest of the Cullens showing up.

Before I could blink she was gone. Jasper let out a deep growl and in a flash, he was gone too.

I sat there just staring off into space trying to come to grips with everything that had just happened.

First there was the fact that Victoria had confirmed my suspicions that she had killed Charlie. Not too much of a surprise there. Of course I could have done without the play-by-play of his murder, but it's not as if she cares about hurting my feelings or anything.

Next there was the whole, I'm gonna torture you angle she had going. I'll admit that it was naïve of me to think she was just going to drain me and wash her hands of me. She was hurting over the death of her mate, so it was only natural that she would want me to feel some, or all, of that pain.

 _Am I seriously feeling sympathetic toward the psycho that has every intention of killing me? Slowly and painfully might I add?_

Okay, so maybe I really _was_ starting to lose it.

Of course there was also the fact that she was, in all reality, coming after the wrong person.

Laurent had told me that she had said 'a mate for a mate'. Okay, I get that, but Edward didn't kill James. Emmett and Jasper did. So if you want to get technical she should be going after Rosalie and Alice. Not me.

 _Doesn't really matter I guess. It's not like she would be willing to sit down and talk semantics._

Now I was trying to come to terms with the fact that none other than Jasper Hale had come to my rescue. Talk about a plot twist.

 _Why was he, of all of the Cullens, here? Had Alice had a vision of Victoria coming for me?_

I guess I would have the opportunity to ask since my biggest issue was the fact that Jasper said they were all on their way here. I was having a difficult time wrapping my head around this. I hadn't heard from any of them in five months and now, all of a sudden, they're coming back.

 _Are they coming back to stay? Had Alice seen Charlie's death and they were coming to be here with me through all of the hoopla like I had wanted?_

I wasn't sure which scenario I wanted it to be. There were so many questions and nowhere near enough answers. Well, I didn't have _any_ answers.

I felt like I was on overload. I wanted nothing more than to shut down for awhile so that I could process everything that was going on. In less than a day my world had once again been flipped on its ear and I felt like I was going to snap.

While I was lost in my internal struggle Jasper had returned. I could see him moving through my peripheral vision. He was walking toward me at a slow human pace. He probably assumed I would freak if he moved too fast.

 _Good call, Jasper. Good call._

He crouched down in front of me, ducking his head to look me in the eye.

"Bella? Are you alright, darlin'?" he asked.

"Jasper?"

Okay, so I wasn't being very eloquent with the fact that I had only been able to say his name, but give me break. I'm in shock here.

"Yeah, it's me sugar. You alright?"

I didn't answer him. I just stared. I was trying to figure out just how I felt about him being here.

Relief. That's what I felt. And fucking grateful. Really his timing was impeccable. I really didn't care how or why he showed up when he did, but in this precise moment it didn't matter. He was here and he saved me. I still didn't seem to be able to answer his question. All of my words were stuck in my throat. Well, all but one it seemed.

"Jasper!"

Before properly thinking about my actions, I launched myself at him and wrapped my arms around him as tightly as I could. Of course as soon as I moved a searing pain shot through most of my body but I pushed it away. Yeah, it hurt like hell but I was alive… and Jasper was here… and the rest of the Cullens were coming.

I was a bit embarrassed that I had jumped on him like that, but it didn't last long. Now don't ask me where the fuck it came from because I honestly don't know, but when the embarrassment left anger took its place. I was so pissed the edges of my line of sight were actually tinted red.

I pulled back away from him just as quickly as I had launched myself at him.

 _Fuck! I gotta stop moving so fast. That shit hurts._

My anger was seriously misplaced. I had no reason to be mad at Jasper. Well, I did what with the whole him trying to eat me thing, but I didn't care then and I still don't. He's a vampire, I was bleeding. You do the math.

No, I was angry with the rest of them, Rosalie excluded. But the fact was he was a Cullen, he was here, and I needed someone to take my anger out on.

 _Sorry, Jasper!_

I narrowed my eyes at him and to my surprise he actually flinched.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I gritted out between my teeth.

If I didn't know any better I would have said that he was a bit scared.

"Uhhh… saving your life?"

I rolled my eyes.

"No shit Dick Tracy. I meant why are you here in Forks? It's been five months Jasper and I haven't heard from any of you. Why did you choose now of all times to show up and play hero?"

He looked a bit taken aback but I didn't really care. I wanted answers.

"Alice. She had a vision about your dad. Everyone decided that we would come back so that we could be here for you,"

The look on his face caused my anger to all but disappear. I didn't know if he could feel the pain inside me over the loss of Charlie since I still wasn't allowing myself to feel it. If he couldn't then the look he was giving me showed me that he really was concerned for me.

"Can you feel me?" I asked

"No, and I have to admit that I'm a little concerned about that."

I sighed and placed my head in my hands, wincing when I made contact with my broken fingers.

"I guess that might be because I'm not really feeling anything right now. I'm just numb. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, what to feel, how to act. Hell, I don't even know who I'm supposed to be calling to tell them Charlie's gone. Now I have even more on my plate to deal with; with you and the rest of your family coming back. It's just too much. I don't know how to do this, Jasper. I feel so… lost."

He stood from his crouched position and sat down beside me. He reached over, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him.

"Bella darlin', that's what we'll be here for. We'll help you with whatever it is that you need. No one is going to expect anything from you or expect you to act a certain way. Right now all you need to do is grieve. You're holding all that in and that's not good. You've been through so much in the last few months. You need to cry and yell and throw things if that's what you feel like doing."

I let out a humorless laugh.

"Trust me Jasper, if I unleashed all of that right now you'd be crying and yelling and throwing stuff right along with me. I don't think my house could survive that."

He chuckled and I actually gave him a genuine smile. It was the first one I had given anyone in a very long time and it felt nice.

"You look tired," he said as he traced the dark circles under my eyes with his free hand.

"Yeah, it's been a long five months."

This time I knew my smile was sad and didn't reach my eyes. The smile he gave me in return mirrored my own.

"I'll tell you what. Why don't you go upstairs and take a bath, and when you're done I'll help you get some much needed sleep. Sound good?"

"Sounds perfect," I replied.

I stood up, slowly this time, and made my way to the bathroom. After closing the door I leaned my head back against it and took a deep breath. It hurt which brought my attention to the fact that I had injuries I needed to tend to. I looked down and grimaced at the swollen purple mess that I had once called my fingers. There wasn't much that I could do about them right now outside of taking a trip to the emergency room. I really wasn't in the mood so I decided to wait for Carlisle. We'll call it a welcome home present.

Using my good hand, I turned the knobs to start my bath water, making it as hot as possible. I stripped out of my clothing, taking as much care as I could with my shirt so as not to further injure my ribs. I struggled with the button of my jeans for a minute or two before finally getting them undone.

I slid into the steaming hot water relishing in the way that it seemed to immediately relax every muscle in my body.

I soaked for awhile before pulling the plug and turning on the shower so I could actually get clean. As much as I loved a nice relaxing bath I never felt clean afterward.

I towel dried my hair a bit before wrapping the towel around my body. Then I realized I had a dilemma. I didn't have any clothes. I thought about just asking Jasper to grab some for me, but then he would have to root around in my panty drawer.

 _Yeah, so not happening._

After a few minutes of trying to figure out what to do I just said fuck it and opened the door. I walked across the hall to my room, quickly closing the door behind me.

"You know that probably would have worked if I were downstairs."

I screamed and jumped about three feet off the floor. I turned to my right to find Jasper sitting in my rocking chair with an infuriating smirk on his face.

"Sweet fucking Jesus, Jasper! What the hell?"

"Sorry darlin'. I didn't realize how unobservant you are. I figured you would have seen me when you came in."

"Well I didn't. So now that you've made the human's heart stop can you give me a minute to get dressed?"

He grinned and I could have sworn I saw him scan my nearly nude body before he stood up and walked to the door.

"Sure thing, darlin'. Give me a holler when you're done."

Once the door was closed I grabbed clean clothes and got dressed as fast as I could manage with only one hand.

"I'm decent," I called.

I grabbed my brush off of the dresser and sat down on the bed as the door opened. Jasper once again took a seat in the rocking chair and watched as I brushed the knots out of my hair.

We sat in silence, me staring out the window and him just watching me. It was like he was waiting for something.

"What?" I finally asked after I couldn't take the silence anymore.

He cocked his head to the side with a confused expression on his face.

I sighed before turning to face him.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Looking at you like what?"

"You're staring at me like you're a cop waiting for their suspect to crack." I felt a twinge in my heart at the cop reference.

He shrugged.

"I guess I'm just not understanding how you're so calm. I've been around humans before when they've lost people they love and I've never experienced _nothing_ from them like I am with you. It's just strange to me."

"Aren't you the one that told me that no one is going to expect me to act a certain way?"

He grinned at me. "Touché."

"I already told you, I'm numb. Too much has happened in such a short period of time and I just can't deal with it all."

"You have had a rough day."

"But it's not just today. It's every day for the last five months. It's almost like you all leaving opened up some sort of door and the bad shit just keeps stomping in like it owns the place. No matter how hard I try I can't seem to close it and when I get close something else comes along and busts it wide open again."

He was quiet for a beat, contemplating what I had just told him.

"I'm sorry, Bella" he finally whispered.

I was confused. I had no idea what he could possibly be apologizing for.

"Why are you sorry?"

He stood up and made his way over to my bed, sitting down beside me.

"I'm sorry because this is all my fault. If I had been in better control of my thirst none of this would be happening. Edward never would have left you and we would have been here to take care of Victoria before she had a chance to get to Charlie. Your life is in chaos because I'm weak and I'm so, so sorry."

 _Well, this just won't do. This won't do at all._

He sat there staring at his hands while he spoke. He couldn't even look me in the eye. I don't know if he realized it but he was projecting his feelings. I felt all of the guilt and remorse that was obviously eating away at him. It was all consuming and I hated that he felt that way. This wasn't his fault at all. His actions were just the catalyst that Edward had been looking for and I refused to let this man go another day feeling like this.

"Jasper, look at me."

He shook his head, so quickly I almost missed it. Now he was projecting shame.

 _Fuck that!_

I grabbed his chin with my good hand and tugged. He wouldn't allow me to move him.

"Jasper, I said look at me!"

He sighed and finally allowed me to turn his face so he had to look at me.

"First of all, you have to know that I never blamed you. I forgave you the moment it happened. I knew that you wouldn't hurt me. Even if you had managed to get to me someone would have stopped you before you could have had the chance to drain me. Yes what happened sucks, especially since it's caused you to carry around all this guilt, but you didn't do anything wrong. I lived to tell the tale, so to speak, and that's all that matters.

"Second of all, I don't ever want to hear you say something so ridiculous ever again. . . You are an empath, Jasper. That night it was not only your own bloodlust that you had to deal with but the bloodlust of five other vampires. I'm Edward's singer for fuck's sake! His bloodlust alone was probably what pushed you over the edge. Even if you had the level of control that Carlisle does you still probably would have taken a snap at me. The fact that you have to feel that from all of them all the time speaks volumes to your strength. Weak is never a word that I would choose to describe you and I don't ever want to hear you use it again either."

"But Bella, the fact remains that my actions are what caused Edward to leave you. If that hadn't happened he would still be here."

"No actually, he wouldn't. Your actions were just the excuse that he was looking for to leave. If you hadn't lunged for me that night he would have found some other reason to go. He didn't love me and he didn't want me forever. That was made blaringly obvious when he refused to change me after being asked God knows how many times. Not to mention he told me himself the day he left me. It hurt like hell to actually hear him say it, but it wasn't like I didn't already know I wasn't good enough for him."

"Wait, what? He actually told you that?"

I nodded.

"Asshole!" he exclaimed under his breath. He shook his head and let out another sigh.

"Bella, what exactly did he say to you?"

"He didn't tell you?"

"No."

I opened my mouth to repeat the words that had shattered my soul, but nothing came out. I couldn't do this right now. I couldn't relive that day, not with everything else.

"Jasper, I promise that I'll tell you, but can we hold off on this conversation for another time? I'm mentally and physically exhausted and I don't know if my already fragile psyche can handle reliving that right now."

He studied me for a moment before nodding his head.

"Alright, but we _will_ talk about this."

"I promise."

He stood up from the bed so I could pull down my covers. It felt so good to crawl into my bed and allow my body to relax.

"Oh my God!" Jasper yelled, making me jump.

"What? What's wrong?"

"What the fuck happened to your hand?"

I hadn't exactly been hiding it, so I don't know how he managed to not see it before now.

"Oh, right. Psycho vampire paid me a visit today. Remember?"

"Bella that looks horrible. You need to have that looked at."

"Tomorrow. Right now I just want to sleep. Besides it doesn't hurt that bad and you know from personal experience that I've had worse."

"Still, I don't think you should wait. If you do they may need to rebreak the bones so they set correctly."

I shrugged, not really caring.

"I know, but at least I'll get some really good drugs if that's the case."

He chuckled and shook his head.

"You are one strange human."

I laughed along with him. "So I've heard."

"We'll have Carlisle take a look when they get here."

"Speaking of which, I thought you told Victoria they were on their way?"

"Oh, yeah, kinda stretched the truth a bit. They are coming but it's a two day drive."

I had to admit that I was glad that I had some more time to prepare myself for their arrival.

He pulled the blanket up over me and I turned on my side to face the window. He sat back down in the rocking chair, picking up a book from the floor.

"What's that?" I asked indicating the book.

He gave me a sly grin and held it up so I could see the cover.

" _Interview with a Vampire_? Seriously?"

"Hey it's actually a good book. Once you get past all the inaccuracies about vampires."

I rolled my eyes and readjusted my head on the pillow to get more comfortable.

"If you say so" I said, closing my eyes.

"Goodnight, darlin'" he said.

"Goodnight, Jasper" I replied through a yawn.

Only seconds later I felt myself drift off as Jasper blanketed me with feelings of peace and comfort.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hello again, lovelies! I'm giving you guys an update in celebration of the start of my vacation! YAY! I'm off work for a week and I plan on working on this story a lot while I'm home. Enjoy!**

JPOV

I sat in the rocking chair reading while I waited for Bella to fall asleep.

Once I heard her breathing even out and I knew she was asleep, I put the book down and just watched her as I allowed my mind to drift back over the events of the day.

I was pissed about the Victoria situation. I had told Edward that we should track her down and deal with her after we were done with James. Of course him being the know-it-all asshole that he _thought_ he was, he told me that she wasn't a threat.

I knew it was bullshit. I had felt the emotional connection between Victoria and James. It wasn't to the extent that I felt between Rose and Emmett or Carlisle and Esme but at the time that didn't mean much. James had been solely focused on his desire to get to Bella, causing all other emotion to take a seat on the backburner. Still, there was something there and it was stronger than what would be shared between friends or two people that were together for convenience.

I had tried to argue this point but Edward was a stubborn mother fucker. When he made his mind up about something there was no changing it. Edward did what Edward wanted and no one else's opinion mattered in the slightest. For someone that claimed not to be, he was extremely selfish.

I was also concerned about the fact that Alice hadn't seen any of this. Surely she would have warned me if she had. Victoria had to have made the decision to go after Bella, so why hadn't Alice seen it?

I pulled my phone out of my pocket to call her so that I could get some answers. I noticed the blinking light indicating that I had a message. In fact, I had several. Twelve texts and fifteen voicemails to be exact.

It was then I noticed the little icon of a bell with a red line through it on the top of the screen. I had put my phone on silent when I had gone hunting and I never turned it back on.

 _Well I guess this solves the mystery, jackass._

I rolled my eyes at myself for being so careless. Just then the screen lit up and Alice's name was flashing back at me.

"Hello, Alice."

"What the hell, Jasper? I've been calling you for hours!"

"I'm sorry. I silenced my phone while I was hunting and didn't turn it back on before I left. I'm assuming you were calling to warn me about Victoria?"

"Yeah. God, we should have listened to you. Bella has been a sitting duck all this time."

"It's okay, Alice. I'm here now and the rest of you will be soon. It's not something we have to worry about right now. Dealing with Victoria will come later. Right now Bella comes first."

"How is she, Jazz?"

"I honestly don't know. I can't feel her. I don't know how she's doing it, but it's like she flipped an emotional switch. There's just nothing."

"How did she take the news that we were coming back?"

"That was pretty much the only time I felt anything from her. She panicked. I didn't tell her yet that Edward isn't with the family but I intend to talk to her more before you all get here."

I heard Bella let out a whimper as she started shifting around like she was uncomfortable. I sat quietly, waiting for her to settle. But then she started talking. Edward had told us that she often talked in her sleep.

"No… please… don't go."

Her words were mumbled and had I not been a vampire I probably wouldn't have been able to make out what she was saying.

"Edward… love you… please."

The tone of her voice told me that she was begging. Begging him not to leave her.

Her slight shifting had turned into full on thrashing and she was crying. Since she was sleeping the walls she had built up to keep her emotions in check had crumbled and I could feel everything. I clutched a hand to my chest and took in a sharp breath as I was hit with all of her pain. It was the most overwhelming thing I had ever experienced and I was floored that she was able to feel like this and still be breathing. I felt like I was dying. Like something was slowly sucking the life from me. It was excruciating.

"Jasper? Jasper!" Alice yelled through the phone.

I tried to send Bella some calm but it wasn't working. The emotional onslaught continued as did her movements. With each sob that escaped her lips so did the names of our family members. I now realized that it wasn't just Edward's departure that had broken her, it was all of us.

I had to get out of that room. It took everything in me not to break down and start sobbing myself.

I slowly pulled myself up from the chair and made my way to the door. All the while I could hear Alice yelling for me through her own sobs. She could hear everything that was going on and it was no doubt causing all kinds of turmoil for the little pixie.

I made it out of the room and felt a tiny bit better with a door between Bella and myself. I went to the living room and sat down on the couch before I put the phone back to my ear to speak to a frantically crying Alice.

"Alice?"

"Oh God, Jasper!" she sobbed. "What have I done? How am I supposed to fix this? I can't… I just…" she trailed off, her tearless sobs taking over.

I did my best to try to calm her down though I didn't know how successful my attempts were. It would have been much easier if she had been here and I could use my gift. Just as Alice's sobs quieted, a blood-curdling, glass-shattering scream echoed throughout the house. I dropped the phone and darted up the steps back to Bella's bedroom.

She was sitting up in the middle of the bed, the sheets and comforter in a knotted mess around her legs and feet. She was covered in sweat and her hands were buried in her damp hair as she sobbed uncontrollably.

I immediately took her in my arms, lifting her off the bed like one would a small child. She wrapped her small arms around me and buried her head I the crook of my neck as she cried. Once I got her legs and feet untangled, her legs, as if acting on instinct, wrapped themselves around my torso.

I sat down on the edge of the bed allowing her to cling to me and soak my shirt with her tears. I rested my cheek against her head as I ran my fingers through her hair in a gesture of comfort and shushed her quietly. I sent her wave after wave of calm and was glad that it seemed to be working, unlike when I had tried while she was dreaming.

After what seemed like hours her sobs had quieted and her breathing had returned to normal. She was still sniffling every now and again, but she had calmed down drastically.

"You alright, Darlin'? I whispered.

She nodded but didn't speak.

"You want to talk about it?"

This time she shook her head no.

I was, admittedly, disappointed. I didn't want to pry but at the same time, I wanted to know what she was dreaming about that would cause such a reaction from her. I knew who was in the dream obviously, but surely just dreaming about us wouldn't cause such a violent reaction, would it?

We sat for a little while longer, her wrapped around me like a monkey on a tree, and me stroking her hair and murmuring to her quietly that she was okay. That everything would be okay.

When she was once again asleep, I laid her back down on the bed. After righting the giant knot that was her blankets, I covered her back up, kissed the top of her head, and slipped back out of the room.

I hadn't forgotten about just leaving Alice on the phone when I raced upstairs. Most people probably would have hung up by now, but I knew she would still be on the line, waiting impatiently for me to tell her that Bella was okay.

"She's fine, Alice" I said as I put the phone back up to my ear. "It was just a nightmare."

"JUST A NIGHTMARE?!" she screeched. "Jazz, it sounded like someone was trying to kill her!"

"Yes, well we can blame our dear brother for that. I swear I could kill him for doing this to her."

She sighed, long and heavy and was silent for a moment before she spoke again.

"It wasn't just Edward. We all did this to her when we went against what we thought was right and did what Edward asked."

This time, I sighed, knowing she was exactly right.

A few minutes later we said our goodbyes and I hung up.

I could hear Bella crying and sniffling in her sleep again so I sent her as much calm and lethargy as her human body could handle. The strength of the emotions quieted her and dragged her down into a very deep sleep that would hopefully be dreamless. Lord knew the poor thing could use a few days of good uninterrupted sleep.

I sat on the floor beside her bed, gently holding her hand with the broken fingers in mine, hoping that my cold skin would stave off some of the swelling. Carlisle was sure to be furious with me for not taking her to the hospital but I wouldn't force her to do anything she didn't want to do. I had seen Edward make that mistake time and time again and I wouldn't be like that with her.

It was nearing noon by the time Bella finally began to stir. I had removed my influence from her hours before but she continued to sleep deeply and, thank goodness, peacefully.

I left the room before she awoke fully. I knew that Edward spent almost every night with Bella but I was not Edward. I wasn't sure how she would feel waking up and finding me in her room.

I would have made her breakfast but I had no cooking skills. Esme remembered some basics from her human days, but there was never any need before Bella entered our lives for any of us to worry about human food and how to prepare it. Now I wish I had paid attention when Esme would cook for her when she was at the house.

I did, however, know how to work a coffee pot but I didn't know if she even drank coffee.

I made some anyway then, feeling rather useless, I sat myself down at the kitchen table and waited for her to come downstairs.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I'm spoiling you guys, I know. I'm giving you chapter 6 today since chapter 5 was so short and I'll be posting chapter 7 on Saturday. I'm trying to stay at least two chapters ahead just in case I run into writer's block. Also if any of you have any fic reccomendations I'd love to hear them. I'm always looking for something new to read!**

BPOV

I awoke the next morning feeling more refreshed and well rested than I had in a long time. I actually smiled as I stretched, but as I did so the excruciating pain in my ribs hit me like a freight train and reminded me that I had little to no reason to smile. Charlie was gone, Victoria wanted me to suffer a long and horrific death, the Cullens were coming back, and I had no idea how to deal with any of it.

Even though the thought of what she had in store for me was terrifying at best, I had to wonder if it wouldn't be better to just let her have me.

The wolves had been doing their best to protect me since discovering that I was what she was here for but in doing so they were split up most of the time. While they were strong in their own right they worked better as a whole and having them separated from each other so often left room for error in protecting their tribe and their land. That was, after all, what they were meant to do. Not protect a danger magnet that just seemed to be living on borrowed time.

If I was gone the Cullens could move on with their existence and their distractions like _he_ said they would and eventually forget about the human they encountered in the rainy Washington town they once called home. I knew that they obviously cared about me to some degree if they were coming back here now, but I had little doubt that they would stick around for long. I felt guilty that they had been uprooted, yet again, because of me. There was a small part of me that wanted to tell Jasper to call them and tell them to stay away, but the bigger, more selfish part of me wouldn't allow that. As anxious and unsure as I was about seeing them again, I missed my vampire family and I needed them.

I rubbed my hands roughly up and down my face, hissing in pain as I did so, completely forgetting about my hand. I looked down at it and was surprised to find that it wasn't as swollen as I thought it would be. I cradled it to my chest and used my good hand to carefully extract myself from the blankets.

As I got dressed my stomach rumbled loudly, reminding me it had been a good long while since I had eaten. I headed downstairs, finding Jasper seated at the kitchen table. He looked out of place at the old table with mismatched chairs, but I wasn't surprised by this. _He_ had too.

"Good morning, Bella."

"Good morning, Jasper."

"I would have made you breakfast but I'm afraid my cookin' skills aren't what they used to be. I do, however, know how to use a coffee pot so I made some. I wasn't sure if you even drink coffee but I felt so useless just sitting here."

He was rambling and I found it funny. I didn't think vampires rambled but apparently I was wrong.

The small smile I gave him was genuine and I thanked him before pouring a cup of the coffee he had made and grabbing some pop tarts from the cupboard.

Neither one of us spoke as we sat across from each other, me nibbling on my breakfast and him watching me. After awhile his staring became unnerving and I had a feeling he had something he wanted to say or ask. Maybe he was projecting. I took a swig of the hot, caffeinated liquid to wash down my last bite.

"What?" I asked once I had swallowed.

"Nothing," he said.

I narrowed my eyes at him and shook my head.

"You have something you want to say or ask. You're projecting."

He leaned forward a little bit, resting his arms on the table.

"Are you ready to talk about it yet?"

"Talk about what?"

"Your nightmares. I know they're about Edward," I winced at the mention of his name and hoped that Jasper hadn't noticed. "You said his name before you started screaming."

I didn't want to talk about it. I had never told anyone what the dreams were about. Not Charlie or my mom. Not even Jake and I told him everything.

"Nothing," was all I said.

"Bella, that was not nothing. You were terrified."

"No, I mean that's the nightmare. It's always the same. _He_ leads me to the woods like he did the day he left, says the words he said that day, and then there's nothing. It's just black but I can feel it, the nothing It closes in on me and starts squeezing me so tight I can't breathe. Just when I feel like I'm taking my last breath I wake up screaming. It's the same every night."

I sighed, hoping that this was the end of this particular conversation but I was disappointed.

"And what words did he say? What did he tell you that day, Bella?"

I didn't want to talk about this. I knew he could feel the uncertainty and pain rolling off of me in waves. Rather than grant me a reprieve and tell me that I didn't have to go down this road just yet, he sat there still as a statue just watching me, waiting for me to speak.

Before I could even begin I was interrupted by someone knocking on my front door.

I noticed Jasper's nose wrinkle and a slightly disgusted look crossed his face.

"It's one of the wolves," he said. "God damn that wet dog smell is horrid! How do you stand being around them?"

"They don't smell bad to me, Jasper. I'm a human, remember?"

I stood from the table and made my way to the door.

I was thankful for whoever was on the other side because that meant the answers Jasper wanted would have to wait. I was a little less than thrilled at the idea of getting lectured on how I shouldn't be hanging around vampires, though. I knew that if Jasper could smell whoever was out here then they would be able to smell him as well.

I opened the door to reveal a very unhappy Jacob standing on the other side.

"Hey, Jake. Come on in."

As I turned to walk back to the kitchen he grabbed my arm.

"Is that one of _them_ I smell?"

"Yes, Jacob," I sighed. "Jasper is here."

"Are you fucking serious, Bella?! The one that saw you as nothing more than a walking, talking, lunchable and you're here all alone with him? Have you completely lost your fucking mind?"

I yanked my arm out of his grasp and just shook my head.

"I'm not in the mood for this today, Jake. Not today. You can lecture about my lack of survival instinct some other time."

"If I leave you here with him there won't be another time. You're coming back to LaPush with me so we can keep you safe!"

He grabbed me again, yanking me forward to pull me out of the house.

"Ouch! You're hurting me Jacob! Let go!"

"No, Bells. I said you're coming with me."

He jerked me forward yet again for emphasis and I cried out in pain as my ribs protested the movement.

He managed to make it about eight steps before Jasper was standing in front of him, blocking his path.

"I believe I heard the lady ask that you let her go. I suggest you do as she says, dog."

"Fuck you, bloodsucker! Of course you want me to leave her here with you. I'm sure my showing up has put a kink in your dinner plans."

Jasper and I simultaneously rolled our eyes, at which I actually giggled. He shot me a grin and a wink before schooling his features back into the calm but terrifying vampire that he was.

"I'm not going to hurt her. If I was going to do so I would have done it already. Now I'm going to ask you again to please take your hands off of her. If you don't then I'll remove them myself."

As stubborn as Jake could be he wasn't stupid. He released his grip on my arm and I quickly stepped away from him. The whole time we had been standing there I could feel the quivering of his body, indicating that he was trying to keep from phasing. Being in such close proximity to the very thing he was designed to protect his people from was making his control difficult to maintain and I didn't want to be too close if he lost his hold on the beast within. Sam's fiancé's beautiful but horribly scarred face was proof of just how dangerous the wolves could be to be around.

"I'm not leaving her here with you, leech."

They started arguing with each other and at that moment I reached my breaking point. I don't know if it was the insulting names Jake kept slinging around or the fact that he was talking like I was incapable of making decisions for myself about my safety but enough was enough. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes, threatening to spill over, but I did my best to hold them at bay.

"STOP IT!" I screamed.

They both immediately stopped and turned to me.

"I can't take this! My father DIED yesterday! Don't you think I have enough to deal with? I don't need you guys fighting on top of it!"

"Bella, you understand that with him here I can't be here to protect you. This is their territory."

"I understand, Jake."

"You're stupid, you know that? You romanticize these things and have these delusions that they care about you and think of you as an equal. They don't! The best you can hope for with these freaks is to be their human pet. A plaything that they can use until the novelty wears off and then drain the life from you before you can blink."

The tears were flowing freely now. He knew me well enough to know which buttons to push with me. I had used almost those exact words to describe to him how I had felt when the Cullens had left and he was well aware of the effect they would have on me. It was like he was trying to hurt me on purpose and in that moment I wouldn't have even blinked of he dropped dead on my front lawn.

I slowly walked up to him, never taking my eyes off of his face. I balled my hand up into a fist, ignoring the pain from my already broken fingers and not caring that my actions were going to hurt me far more than they would hurt him. With as much strength as my little human body could muster I threw my fist forward and landed a punch to Jake's jaw. I internally screamed in pain. I could ear and feel every good bone on my hand break against his unyielding jaw but outwardly I didn't even flinch.

"Did you seriously just punch me?" he asked, shocked.

"Get the fuck out of here, Jacob Black. Go home and don't come back. EVER!"

"Oh come on, Bells. You know you don't mean that. I'm sorry for what I said, I just…"

"JUST WHAT? Just wanted to rip that wound open again so I would be in more pain than I already am? Well congratulations, fucktard! Mission accomplished. You can go now."

I started walking back toward the house when a warm hand grabbed me again, gently this time. I didn't turn to look at him.

"Bella, please. I'm sorry."

"I don't care, Jake. You made a promise to me that you would never hurt me. You've broken that promise before but it never hurt as badly as it did today. I can't even look at you right now, so please just go."

"But, Bella..."

"Jacob, I'm begging you. Just go. You're so concerned about being there for me, and protecting me, and keeping me safe? Where were you yesterday, huh? Where was my BEST FRIEND when Victoria showed up at my house and gave me a play by play on how she killed my father? Where were you when she told me how she planned to take me away and force me to suffer a slow, torturous death?"

"She was here?" he asked.

"Yes, she was here. She was waiting for me when I got home from the hospital. Had Jasper not shown up when he did she would have taken me and been doing God knows what to me right now. And where were you? I was just told my dad was dead and you weren't here. Jasper saved my life and instead of thanking him for saving somene you claim to care so much about you insult him and treat him like HE'S the enemy. You know the Cullens are different from other vampires and yet you condemn them right along wth the rest. No more, Jacob. Until you can put your hatred and bigotry against them aside you aren't welcome here."

I didn't wait for a response. I shook him off again and made my way inside. After closing the door I slid to the floor and just sobbed. I cried for my dad. I cried for Edward and the vampire family I loved so much. I cried for Jake. I cried for the blinding pain my severely broken hand was causing me. I just cried.

Now that the floodgate had been opened I was afraid I'd never stop.

Two cold arms enveloped me and lifted me up from the floor. I didn't see where he was taking me until I felt the familiar material of my sheets on my skin. As he started pulling away I grabbed his arm, holding it to me, asking silently for him to stay.

"I'm not going anywhere, darlin'."

He lay down with me and wrapped me in his arms, holding me tightly to his chest as I cried. I took the comfort he offered and just let myself feel everything I had kept bottled up for so long.

I was sure that my emotions were causing pain for Jasper and I was surprised he wasn't manipulating them to calm me down.

"I won't manipulate your feelings," he said as though he read my mind. "You need to feel this. That's the only way you're going to start to heal."

I nodded, telling him I understood. I knew he was right.

"I'm sorry" I whispered through my tears.

"For what?" he asked.

I let the walls come down fully for the first time and unleashed the storm of feelings I had kept at bay for far too long.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello again, my lovelies! Here is chapter 7 for your reading pleasure! Thank you to my reviewers and to everyone who has alerted/favorited. I'm glad so many of you are enjoying my little tale. Leave me a review and let me know what you think!**

JPOV

During my time serving in Maria's army I had seen and been the cause of many deaths. On her orders I decimated entire covens of vampires all on my own, feeling every emotion they felt in their final moments. Maria loved to have me rip their heads off and set them aside, forcing them to watch as I burned their bodies. Unfortunately for me this allowed them to also _feel_ their death. Having an infallible memory I can remember with perfect clarity how it felt as the flames engulfed their bodies. The process of death for a vampire was extraordinarily painful and one that I did my best to try to forget.

Lying with Bella in my arms as she finally allowed herself to let go, I wished for the pain of that death. I would feel that a thousand times over than to ever have to feel anything like I was in that moment from her ever again.

Her utter despair was like a living entity. The weight of it bearing down on the both of us, making me feel as though my very soul was being crushed into nothing. It was obvious to me now that even in her sleep the previous night the walls she had built to hold all of this in had not fallen as I had thought. In her unconscious state it had simply cracked, allowing just a small taste through.

Just like with everything it got worse before it got netter. I held her tighter, a natural reaction I suppose, being careful not to hurt her. For a moment I felt her trying to rein her emotions in.

"No, Bella don't do that." I gritted out through my teeth. It was difficult to talk with the weight of everything she was feeling but I couldn't let her stop feeling this on my account. "Let it go. Let all that toxic shit out. Don't worry about me right now. I'll feel this with you every day for as long as it takes to make you better."

I meant that with everything in me. Regardless of her forgiving me for the part I played in causing all of this I still felt like I had to do something make it up to her. If this is what I had to do to atone for my sins then so be it.

Her sobs came louder and harder and she clutched my shirt with her good hand, clinging to me so tightly I heard the fabric start to rip.

I don't know how long we lay there like that but eventually the brutal emotional climate calmed. Her cries had quieted and her heavy breathing was now back to normal.

It seemed almost a crime to disturb the quiet calm we were now feeling so I took the time to just enjoy it. Even through the emotional turmoil it didn't go unnoticed how much I enjoyed holding her. Her small frame fit perfectly in my arms and the warmth she gave off just enhanced the experience.

I looked down at her face seeing that her eyes were closed but I knew she wasn't asleep. Despite her red, tear streaked face I couldn't deny that she was beautiful. Of all of her features, her lips are what drew my attention the most. They were perfectly shaped and full even though the bottom one was slightly fuller than the top. I felt slightly guilty as I imagined what it would feel like to have those lips on mine, and even guiltier as I thought about what it would be like to see them parted slightly as she moaned my name.

 _What the hell is wrong with you, Whitlock? This is not the time or place for these thoughts. Not to mention she loves Edward!_

But what if she didn't?

I decided that this train of thought was far too dangerous for all parties involved. I was just about to open my mouth when Bella's stomach growled loudly, breaking the silence for me. She laughed a little and shook her head.

She extracted herself from my arms and I almost whimpered at the loss of contact. I had obviously been enjoying that far too much.

"Well I obviously need to eat" Bella said. "What about you? Do you need to hunt?"

"I'm fine, darlin'. Besides, there's no way I'm leaving you alone right now."

"You could always take me with you," she said with a shrug. "I've always wondered what it would be like to see you guys hunt."

I shook my head and smiled. She was such a strange human.

I could feel that she was legitimately curious so I gave pause to think the idea through. Given that my thirst was as completely sated as it could be I could probably take her out for a quick hunt just to give her an idea of what our hunting practices were like.

"We'll see," I said not committing one way or the other. "Let's get you fed."

I got up from my spot on the bed and we headed downstairs.

After twenty minutes of fruitless hunting for something she wanted to eat I decided to take her out. I figured if nothing else she could use some time away from her house and all of the memories. Since I didn't have a vehicle and we had to take her truck I didn't want to venture far so we settled on the diner in town.

Everyone stared as we entered and most continued after we had been seated. I seemed to be the only one of us to notice though.

"So Jasper," she said once the server had walked away after she placed her order, "tell me about you. We never got the opportunity to get to know one another before."

"There was good reason for that, sugar. My past isn't exactly a pleasant one."

"Well that doesn't change the fact that I want to know. It's not like I'm going to think less of you because of it."

I chuckled darkly.

"Remember you said that after I tell you. Not here though. That's a conversation best had without prying ears," I said nodding toward all of our admirers.

Her meal was delivered and while she ate we chatted about inconsequential things. She wanted to know what we had all been up to while we were away so I filled her in on our comings and goings over the last several months. She got a particular kick out of hearing about Emmett and Rosalie's trip to Africa and his epic battles with some of the wildlife there.

"What about you?" I asked. "Besides being hunted down by a psychotic vampire hell bent on revenge, what has Miss Swan been doing with her time?"

She sighed and gazed out the window for a moment. She looked sad again and I could have kicked my own ass for bringing down her cheerful mood.

"Wallowing. The more I think about it the more I realize how selfish I was after you all left. I shut everyone out and honestly I acted like I was the only girl in the world to ever be dumped. I had no reason to act that way and to put my parents through that. I was just hurting so much. It felt like someone had punched a hole through my chest and tore my heart out.

"It got better when I started hanging out with Jake. When we were together I barely felt the hole but it never lasted long. As soon as I was alone again the pain came back tenfold and of course there were the dreams."

I was happy that she was starting to open up to me. Just like feeling the emotions she had bottled up would help her heal, so would taking about everything. Unfortunately we were interrupted when the server reappeared to bring the check.

Before she could protest I grabbed the check and went to pay for her meal. She glared at me when I returned to the table but I just smiled at her and helped her with her coat. She was quiet as we drove back to her house and when we arrived she made no move to get out of the truck.

"Are you ok, darlin'?"

She turned her head to look at me and I saw that she had tears streaming down her face.

"I don't want to go in there, Jasper. He's everywhere I look and I just can't be in there."

I wasn't sure if the _he_ she was referring to was Charlie or Edward but either way I didn't want her to be in pain anymore.

"Wait here."

Using my vampire speed I entered the house and went up to her room. I found her suitcase in the closet and packed as much of her clothing into it as I could. I grabbed the smaller overnight bag she had and used that for her toiletries. I could come back for anything else she needed or wanted later. Just as I was about to exit the house it occurred to me that I had never fixed the back door after charging through it the day I arrived.

 _Jesus, was that just yesterday?_

I ran through the house looking for something to use as a band aid for the time being and lucked out when I found a large piece of plywood in the basement. I nailed it up quickly to cover the doorway, making a mental note to have it properly fixed before Bella decided she wanted to come home.

I tossed Bella's bags in the back of the truck, and slid back into the cab.

"What was that? Where are we going?"

"You're coming to stay with us. There's more space at our house and to be honest I'd feel better having you there with all of us until we can do something about Victoria."

"Jasper, no. I don't anyone to feel put out by my being there."

"If you're talking about Rosalie then don't worry about it. She never allowed it to show but she does care about you Bella."

"What about Ed-Edward?"

I hated the way she tripped over his name like it pained her to say it. I guess now was the perfect time to put her mind at ease when it came to him.

"You don't have to worry about him. He took off on his own before we even made it to Alaska. He only calls every now and again to check in and let Carlisle and Esme know he's ok."

She nodded and didn't speak again so I put the truck in reverse and headed for home.

As we pulled up in front of the huge white house, my phone alerted me that I had a text.

 **Put her in the spare room next to your study. We'll be there in 12 hours. Take her hunting. Everything will be fine.**

I exited the truck and grabbed Bella's bags from the back. I opened her door and helped her out, knowing it wasn't easy with her injuries. Injuries that I still wished she would go have looked at, especially since she punched Jacob in the face. While I was worried about what it had done to her already fucked up hand I couldn't help but be proud of her for what she had done. She stood her ground with him and defended me and our family with the wrath of a god. She really was one of the most amazing women I had ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Once we were inside I deposited her things in her new room, lit the furnace, and grabbed a blanket from the hall closet and led her out the back door. I took her to the side yard where Esme had built a beautiful gazebo in the middle of her gardens. There was a large round swing hanging from the ceiling that could probably fit four people comfortably.

"What are we doing out here?" she asked, confused.

"We have a conversation to finish and since it's going to take awhile for the house to heat up anyway I figured we could sit out here for awhile.

Once she got comfortable I covered her with the blanket and tucked it in around her to keep her as warm as possible. It was February after all but it wasn't as cold as it could have been. I climbed up beside her and wrapped my arm around her, hoping she wouldn't mind as I had missed her warmth and also hoping she would curl into me like she had earlier. I wasn't disappointed.

"Is this ok?" She asked. "You're kind of comfortable but I don't want you to feel awkward."

I chuckled and ruffled her hair a bit.

"It's not weird or awkward, darlin'. I like it actually. The warmth is nice."

 _Tell me you didn't just fucking say that out loud!_

I rolled my eyes at myself but my comment didn't seem to bother her as she didn't say anything.

"So are you going to tell me your story now?"

"Yes, Bella. Just remember, it's not pleasant."

I launched into my story and told her everything. I told her what I could remember of my human life, which wasn't much. I told her about the night I was turned and the horrible things I did for so long afterward. As I told her in great detail about that part of my life I waited to feel the disgust and horror at what I had done but it never came. She felt sorrow, sympathy, a bit of anger, and relief came when I told her about Peter and Charlotte coming back for me after I had allowed them to leave together.

"You'd like them," I told her. "Peter is a lot like Emmett and Char is a spitfire. The two of them together is hilarious most of the time."

She smiled a beautiful genuine smile and I couldn't help but return it. If I thought she was beautiful before it was nothing compared to when she was smiling.

"So what part of that was supposed to make me think less of you?" she asked.

"Did you miss the part where I said I've killed people? I'm a monster, Bella."

"No, you're really not. Is a snake a monster because it eats a mouse? Is a lioness a monster because she takes down a gazelle to feed her pride? No, it's the way things are. Humans are your natural food source. That was all you knew until someone came along and told you differently. As soon as you knew there was another way to survive you went with it. You're not a monster, Jasper. I admire you so much because of the life you've lead. You're strong and for what it's worth I'm proud of you for overcoming so much to be the man you are now. And honestly, you should be proud of yourself too, Major."

She winked at me as she used my official title and I can't lie and say I didn't like the way it sounded coming from her. In fact the slight tightening of my jeans told me I liked a little too much. I just smiled and hugged her tightly as she sent me her pride, admiration, and love.

"So, about that hunting trip," I said. "You ready to see how it's done?"

"Are you serious? You'll take me?"

"It's an awful idea and Esme is probably going to attempt to remove a limb or two if she finds out but if you really want to go then I'll take you."

She jumped up, nearly falling over in the process, and held her hand out to me. Her smile was radiant and contagious. I slid my hand into hers and stood up. I carefully slung her onto my back, relishing the feeling as she wrapped her arms and legs around me, hanging on tightly.

Once she was settled I wrapped my hands around her ankles for my own peace of mind and took off into the forest.


	8. Chapter 8

Jasper shot off into the forest and I found myself giggling excitedly at the speed. I had forgotten how much fun it was to run like this. As he ran I allowed myself a moment, just a moment, to forget. I forgot about how much my life sucked. I forgot that Charlie was gone. I forgot about Victoria. I forgot about the gaping hole in my chest that Edward and his family leaving had caused. I squeezed Jasper tighter and thanked him with my emotions. I was sure he'd question me about it later but for the moment he just let me enjoy myself.

After about fifteen minutes he began to slow his run until he was walking at a quick human pace. When we stopped completely he helped me down from his back and stood stock still. I could only guess that he was seeing what was in the area since he seemed to be listening intently and every now and then he'd take a deep breath, scenting the air.

"There's a herd of elk about 3 miles west and they're headed in this direction. I'm going to put you in that big tree behind you as close to the top as I can get you so that you can still see. Now please listen to what I'm going to tell you and do exactly as I say. It is so beyond dangerous for you to be out here while I'm hunting but I think this is a side of us that you need to see."

I nodded, indicating that I understood. I was just so grateful that he was willing to show me his more animal side rather than hide it from me. Had I asked Edward to take me hunting with him he would have lost his mind!

"The first thing you have to remember is that when we hunt we give ourselves over to instinct and let the monster in us have free reign. I won't have to do that since I'm not really thirsty so I'll be able to think around that part of myself. That being said it doesn't mean that I can control him completely. You must stay as still and quiet as you possibly can. Do not do ANYTHING that might draw my attention. Do you understand?"

I nodded again and swallowed audibly. I was honestly starting to think that this was a terrible idea. Before I could voice any concerns, Jasper grabbed me around my waist and jumped up into the tree he had indicated earlier. He found a sturdy branch strong enough to support my weight and put me down.

"Wrap your arms around the trunk of the tree and don't let go. If you fall to your death Carlisle and Esme will have my head and I quite like it being attached."

I giggled at the imagery and nodded again.

"I promise I won't let go."

He grinned at me and then disappeared.

Now that I was alone hundreds of feet in the air I grew anxious. I did, after all, have a twisted, sadistic vampire after me. What if she had been watching us and followed us out here? There was no escape for me up here and I had no idea if, while in hunting mode, Jasper would even remember that I was here.

Brushing those horrific thoughts aside, I looked down toward the ground, instantly regretting my actions.

 _Jesus, fuck this is high! I think I might vomit!_

If I fell from this height there would be no surviving. Then again I was out here with a vampire and if I did fall, as long as I didn't break my neck on the way down, he could just change me.

The hole in my chest flared painfully at that thought. That was the life I had wanted for myself once. But that was when I had Edward; when I had someone to share eternity with. I had always thought that given my inability to relate to people I had been born to be a vampire. Now though I wasn't so sure. Now I felt more like I had never had too many meaningful relationships in my life because I wasn't meant to be in this world for very long. I would have been dead long ago had it not been for one Cullen or another.

I shook my head, dispelling these depressing thoughts and took a minute to look around at my surroundings. The forest was eerily quiet and I knew that was because the animals sensed the threat that was Jasper, lurking somewhere close by. I couldn't see much due to the tall trees being in the way but I could just make out the snow capped mountains off in the distance. Looking down again I saw a small clearing just beyond where we had stopped. It was a near perfect circle with a small brook cutting down the center then branching off to the left, leading to some unknown body of water. I was sure that in the summer that little clearing was alive with color from the wildflowers that grew and the brook would draw the wildlife in as a place to drink and rest before carrying on with whatever it is that animals do all day. As I waited patiently for some type of movement below I realized that this was precisely why the elk Jasper had sensed were headed this way.

I saw a flash of movement out of the corner of my eye and when I looked around I spotted Jasper in a tree on the opposite side of the clearing. I took in a quick breath at the sight of him. He was crouched low on the branch, holding on to the one above his head. Even from this distance I could see that his eyes were as black as night and the way he held himself just screamed "Danger!". I saw the elk enter the clearing in my periphery but no matter how hard I tried to look away from the beautiful, yet dangerous, creature in front of me, I just couldn't.

His movements were slow and calculated as he descended the tree. He looked every bit the predator that I knew him to be and the way he moved with such precision showed the soldier in him.

He made it to the ground without alerting the elk to his presence, though it was obvious that the bull in the group knew something was off with the way he kept stopping to look around.

I watched, enraptured, as Jasper took a few silent steps toward the herd. I could see the movement of every muscle under his tight black t-shirt as he stalked toward them, getting ready to strike. Faster than my human eyes could register, Jasper darted out from his hiding spot and took down the bull, breaking his neck before they hit the ground. The rest of the herd took off in a panic as Jasper opened his mouth and sunk his teeth into the animal's neck and began to drain its life away.

My emotions were confusing as I witnessed the goings on below and my body's reaction to seeing something so primal concerned me a great deal. As a human being I should have been terrified and maybe even a bit disgusted by what I was seeing. Instead I was excited and turned on. I felt the wetness pool between my legs the second I had caught sight of him and it had only increased as the seconds ticked by. I rubbed my thighs together, trying to get the ache to stop but that only exacerbated the problem.

 _Get a grip, Swan! There's nothing sexy about what just happened and this is your best friend's husband for Christ's sake!_

I knew my inner voice was right but I had no way to control what was happening to me.

Just as Jasper drained the last of the elk's blood the wind kicked up a bit, blowing my hair forward and no doubt my scent right in Jasper's direction. I prayed that I was too high up for him to catch it but apparently no one was listening. He spun around and before I could blink he was standing in front of me, a bit too close for comfort I might add. He breathed in deeply and his eyes grew darker if that was possible. A sinister, yet seductive smile spread across his gorgeous face. This did nothing for the little problem I was having except make it worse.

"Did you like that, darlin'?"

I shrugged noncommittally.

"It was definitely interesting," I said, trying to seem normal. He didn't need to know what watching him had actually done to me.

He leaned in closer, making me squirm under his intense gaze. He then leaned in close enough that his lips gently brushed my ear as he spoke.

"Judging by the way you smell it was more than just interesting."

 _Busted! Fucking vampires and their ridiculously enhanced senses. You can't get away with shit around these people!_

I blushed what I was sure was an alarming shade of red and cursed whichever parent was responsible for passing on that particular trait.

He chuckled and I watched as the black slowly faded from his eyes but never returning to the bright gold I knew they should be just after hunting.

He pulled me up onto his back again, taking such care that I found myself smiling.

"Come on, let's get you home. The house should be nice and toasty by now and I'm sure after standing in this tree for so long you'd like to get a shower and maybe some food."

Once we returned to the house Jasper showed me where I would be staying. The room was, of course, huge and the walls were painted a pretty lavender color. There was a large white four poster bed sitting against the wall to my left and, like the rest of the house, the wall on the right was made entirely out of glass. Jasper had yet to raise the large metal shutters that covered the giant window so I couldn't see outside.

There were two white doors directly across the room from where I stood and I assumed one was a closet and the other a bathroom. There was a large overstuffed chair in the corner closest to me next to the window with an ottoman. I thought I remembered seeing one in a store in Phoenix and it was called a chair and a half. There was a small table where a lamp would sit next to the chair and built into the wall were bookshelves that reached floor to ceiling.

The only other furniture in the room was two nightstands on either side of the bed and the walls were bare of any decoration. There were no linens on the bed, just my suitcase and duffle bag.

"The bathroom is through the door on the left and the closet is on the right. While you're showering I'll go get the bed linens from the closet down the hall and get it set up for you. Naturally there's no food in the house so I'm going to order you a pizza. Anything in particular you like on it?"

"Just pepperoni is fine. We'll need to do some grocery shopping if I'm going to be staying here."

"We can do that tomorrow. Now go shower."

He pushed me gently in the direction of the bathroom and disappeared down the hall.

When I opened the door to the bathroom I was sure that I had died and this was heaven. That was the only explanation I had for the epicness I was currently gaping at.

The shower was huge and probably had enough room for six people. It sat at an angle in the corner and was enclosed on three sides by what looked like natural stone there were three shower heads, one on each of the stone walls, pointing toward the center and what looked like an exhaust fan in the ceiling.

On one side of the shower, which was the focal point of the room, was a huge claw foot tub that I knew would be amazing to soak in. A fireplace was built into the wall next to it, sitting just above level with the edge of the tub.

On the other side of the room was his and hers sinks with more counter and cabinet space than my kitchen at home. The mirror spanned the length of the entire wall and there was a small chair to sit at the vanity to do any primping that was needed.

I was concerned at the lack of a toilet but then I spotted a frosted glass door along the wall next to the sinks. I looked inside and shook my head in amusement at the fact that even the small little closet for the toilet was far bigger than necessary.

I stripped out of my clothes and entered the shower. The controls were a bit more complicated than I thought they needed to be but I eventually figured it out. I was pleasantly surprised to find that what I had thought was an exhaust fan was actually another shower head that cascaded down like a waterfall.

Once I was clean I took a second and sat down on one of the benches along the wall, just enjoying the spray of the water and thinking back on the events of the day. It had started kind of shitty given what happened with Jake but sitting here now I could honestly admit this had been one of the best days I'd had in a long time and I had the amazing vampire that I now considered a good friend to thank for that.

He had done so much for me in such a short period of time and I wished that I had some way to repay him for that.

I sighed having no idea what I could possibly do to say thank you and stood up. I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, shivering slightly at the difference in temperature. I made to grab a towel and realized there wasn't one hanging there. I searched through the cupboards under the sinks and stomped in frustration when I came up empty handed.

 _Well what the hell am I gonna do now?_

I opened the door, peeking into the bedroom to make sure Jasper wasn't in there. The bed was made so I knew he had been. I had hoped he would have left a towel on the bed for me but alas there was none.

"Jasper!" I called.

Before I could say anymore he was standing in the room, getting a nice full frontal view of me in all my naked glory. Now I hadn't opened the door that much to begin with but once I noticed he wasn't in the room I had opened it further.

I should have just slammed the door and found a hole to crawl into and die of embarrassment but I couldn't move. The look in his eyes as he took in my current state rooted me to the spot.

His eyes were black, like they had been earlier in the forest. There was a hunger in them but I was pretty sure it had nothing to do with my blood. He scanned my body greedily and when his eyes returned to my face I almost moaned out loud at the absolute desire I saw on his face. Wetness pooled between my legs again only this time there was no barrier to stop it from flowing.

He sniffed the air like he had earlier and again his eyes darkened. He closed his eyes as he took in another deep breath and that must have broken whatever spell I was under because I found myself backing up quickly and shutting the door.

"I need a towel," I whispered, knowing he could hear me.

There was silence for a second and then his voice came through the door. By the sound I could tell he was standing right up against it.

"It's on the bed. Bella, I'm so sorry. I didn't think you would be in the room… like that. I didn't even think about the fact that there were no towels in there."

"It's ok, Jasper. I'm sorry too. I should have come back in here and shut the door before I yelled for you."

He didn't say anything else. I dried off and dressed quickly before opening the door again. He was not in the room and I was grateful. I needed a minute to calm my embarrassment before I could face him. I sat on the edge of the bed and towel dried my hair as much as I could, taking extra time to delay going downstairs. After I brushed my hair I decided to unpack my clothes as well. I was hanging up the last of my shirts when Jasper knocked quietly.

"Bella, darlin', your food is here."

"I'm coming."

I made my way to living room and found Jasper sitting on the couch with my open pizza box on the coffee table. My stomach rumbled when I smelled the food and my embarrassment was forgotten for a second as hunger took over.

I sat down next to him and picked up the glass of soda that was sitting on the table and took a huge gulp before grabbing a slice of pizza and starting to eat. I finished my meal in silence. I could see him watching me from the corner of my eye but I pretended like I didn't notice.

"Bella, I really am sorry."

"You don't have to keep apologizing, Jasper. It's ok."

"For what it's worth you have nothing to be embarrassed about."

I snorted and shook my head looking at him and rolling my eyes. I grabbed the small throw pillow that was between us and threw it at him.

"Don't make it weird, dick."

He laughed and just like that the tension and embarrassment were gone.

We sat for hours just talking, taking the time to get to know each other some more. He told me that Alice had texted before he took me hunting and said they would be here soon. I was as ready to see them again as I would ever be so I tried not to fret about it too much. I started getting sleepy around midnight. Even though I hadn't gotten up until noon it had been a long day.

"Do you have any movies here?" I asked.

"I think there's a few in Emmett and Rosalie's room."

"Nevermind. I have no desire to watch any movie that they feel the need to keep hidden in their room."

He chuckled at my joke and disappeared from the room for a second, returning with a small stack of DVDs.

"We don't have much to choose from at the moment but there are a couple good ones in here."

He handed me the stack asking me to choose one. I shuffled through them and smiled as I handed him my choice.

"You're punishing me, aren't you." He said as he looked at the case containing _Gone with the Wind_.

"No, Jasper I'm not punishing you. I happen to like that movie."

He put the movie in and turned out the lights before taking his seat next to me. Much to his probable delight I fell asleep quickly, falling into inappropriate, albeit pleasant, dreams of my southern savior.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hello again, lovelies and welcome to chapter 9! I've hit a bit of a roadblock in my writing but don't fret! The next two chapters are completely written and I have no doubt that I'll get my groove back before long. Thank you for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! You guys are awesome and I appreciate every one of you for taking the time to read this! Enjoy! :)**

JPOV

I thanked whatever deity was on my side when Bella fell asleep, saving me from having to suffer through that God forsaken movie. I switched it out for some action movie just to have some background noise while I watched her sleep. Once I was satisfied she was sleeping deeply enough to move her without waking her, I gently lifted her into my arms and took her to her room.

After covering her up I noticed the bathroom door was open slightly, reminding me of the sight I had the pleasure of witnessing earlier in the evening.

When I had smelled her arousal in the forest I had a hard time reigning in my inner beast. It was worse when I saw her standing in that very doorway with nothing on. When the smell of her arousal reached me again it took every shred of humanity I had left not to throw her on the bed and take her then and there.

She was absolutely gorgeous and everything about her was perfect in my eyes. Her breasts were the perfect size and I knew they would fit nicely in the palm of my hands. She had curves in every place a woman should and the only part about that encounter that disappointed me was the fact that I hadn't gotten a view of her ass before she came to her senses and shut the door. I had obviously taken a look at it when she had been clothed and I more than liked what I saw.

My feelings for this small human girl were growing by the second and I wasn't sure how I felt about that. It was more than just sexual feelings. I felt the need to keep her safe. To make sure that no one hurt her ever again and to make sure she knew every single day that she was loved and wanted. I dare say that I was falling for her but those thoughts would be kept to myself. The last thing she needed right now was some lovesick fool panting after her when she had so much more to deal with.

 _Or maybe, just maybe, that's exactly what she needs. Maybe having a man in her life who actually loves her rather just have some fucked up infatuation with her would be good for her._

I shook my head at my inner ramblings and left the room. As correct as that assumption probably was I would wait to see how my feelings for her developed and only when I was SURE that I was falling for her would I say anything.

Around five o' clock in the morning, exactly twelve hours since I received Alice's text, I heard cars turn onto the long driveway that lead to our home. Their emotions were like a roller coaster, fluctuating between excitement, fear, trepidation, anger, and relief. I moved from my spot on the couch, stepping out on to the porch to greet them.

Esme reached me first. She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. She never handled it well to being separated from any of us for very long. She pulled back and looked me in the eye.

"How is she, Jasper? Is she ok? Did Victoria hurt her?"

"Esme, my love, one question at a time," Carlisle said from behind her. "Why don't we all get everything inside and then Jasper can fill us in on what's been going on."

I nodded at him and set about helping them unload the cars, deciding to leave the big stuff that was in the moving trucks Alice and Emmett had been driving for later.

We all took our seats around the large dining room table, sort of our unofficial family meeting place. I didn't wait for them to start asking questions before I started telling them everything that had happened since I arrived.

"As you all know Victoria was here when I arrived. She didn't manage to hurt Bella too badly but, Carlisle, you're going to need to take a look at her hand as soon as she wakes up. It wasn't looking too hot when I noticed it last night and then she had to go and punch a werewolf in the jaw and just mangled it all to hell. "

"Why didn't you take her to the hospital?" Esme asked.

"I was going to but she refused to go. She said she would wait for Carlisle to get here and have him tend to it. I know I could have just taken her but I won't take her choices away from her. There's been too much of that going on in her life. I've been doing my best to keep the pain at bay, absorbing it from her, but that's all I can do for it."

I explained everything that happened with Jacob and, when Rosalie asked, gave them all a small taste of what Bella had been feeling both times she broke down. I only allowed them to feel for a second but it was enough to have the women sobbing tearless sobs and the men clenching their teeth through the pain, venom shining in their eyes as well.

"What have we done?" Esme said to no one in particular.

"How is she now?" Emmett asked.

"To be honest I have no idea. She seems ok most of the time. I had her smiling and laughing earlier and she really seemed to enjoy running with me when I took her hunting but sometimes her emotions go to a pretty dark place so it's hard to tell."

"YOU TOOK HER HUNTING?" Esme screamed. "What the HELL is wrong with you? You could have killed her!"

I flinched visibly at her tone. I had expected this reaction from her but it still scared the shit out of me. Esme may seem like the weak link in our family but when it came to her kids, especially Bella since she was still fragile, she was fierce and not someone even I would be willing to fuck with.

"Esme, I saw when he decided to take her and nothing bad would have happened. I told him to take her," Alice said defending me. "He was in control the whole time. If I would have thought for even a second that he might hurt her you know I would have told him not to do it."

"Never again, Jasper Whitlock-Hale! You will never put your sister in danger like that again. Am I understood?"

"Yes ma'am," I said.

Hearing Esme call Bella my sister left a bad taste in my mouth. It didn't fit the relationship we were developing and the last time I checked normal people did not have thoughts about their sister like I had been having about Bella. No, sister would not do at all.

"Jazz," Rosalie called, getting my attention.

"Sorry, spaced out there for a minute."

She looked at me suspiciously and her emotions were curious but she didn't voice anything to give me a hint as to why.

"How have you been around her?" Carlisle asked. "Has it been difficult dealing with the bloodlust?"

"You know, Carlisle, it's the damnedest thing. I haven't really felt anything since I got here. Maybe a slight tickle in my throat but nothing like before. Now, I haven't exactly been exposed to her free flowing blood but even if I was I'm pretty sure I'd be fine."

He looked thoughtful but seemed satisfied with my answer and let the subject drop.

"We heard from Edward on our way here," Emmett told me. "We didn't tell him we were coming back here but he did say something about coming home soon."

"Better later than sooner. I have a bone to pick with that little prick the next time I see him and it may not end well."

I was surprised when Carlisle and Esme said nothing. I knew how they felt about Bella but Edward was their first son and Carlisle's first companion. They almost always took his side and defended him any time one of us questioned him or called him to the carpet. Apparently he fucked up badly enough this time that they finally realized he wasn't as perfect as they had thought.

Once we had finished catching up Carlisle and Esme set to work getting the house back together. Emmett headed off to hook up his game system and I was accosted by Alice and Rosalie.

"Come on," Alice said. "We're going hunting."

I panicked at the idea of leaving Bella. I had been with her every second since I got back and I wasn't sure I could leave her, even if there would be three others here to keep her safe. The idea of not being under the same roof as her was almost causing physical pain.

"I don't need to hunt. I just went and I know you guys did too before you got here."

She rolled her eyes and huffed in annoyance.

"She'll be fine, Jazz, I promise. We need to talk and I don't want to do it here."

They had to all but drag me out of the house and into the forest. We had mapped it out years ago that once we jumped the river we were out of earshot of the house. As soon as my feet hit the ground I stopped. There was no way I was going any further than absolutely necessary. I sat down on a nearby bolder and waited for them to spit out whatever it was they had to say.

"What's going on?" Rosalie finally asked.

"Gonna have to elaborate a little bit, sister dear. I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Don't play stupid with me, Jazz. We've been pretending to be twins far too long for you to think you can get away with lying to me. You like her, don't you."

"I had a vision while we were hunting earlier," Alice chimed in. "Rose could tell there was something up when I came out of it and she made me tell her. You know how persuasive she can be."

I wasn't entirely convinced that Rose wasn't gifted. That girl could talk her way into or out of just about anything.

"And what vision did you have, Alice?"

She gave me that cat that ate the canary grin of hers and I knew what she had seen before she even said the words.

"Bathroom," was all she said and I knew that had I been human my face would have been as red as a fire truck.

"I saw how you looked at her. That was more than just a man looking at a naked woman, Jazz. We both know that. And you didn't tell her that we aren't together anymore did you."

"I didn't exactly think that was the right time to mention that I was single, Alice. What was I supposed to say? 'Oh hey naked Bella! Did I mention yet that Alice and I split up?'. Not likely!"

She rolled her eyes at me again and crossed her arms.

"I didn't mean you should have said it then. You guys have been talking pretty much nonstop since you got here and you never bothered to mention it. If she's having feelings for you, and I'm pretty sure she is, then she's going to feel all kinds of guilty about it if she thinks we are still together."

I sighed and stood, beginning to pace in front of them. I wasn't ready to admit my feelings. Hell I didn't even know what they meant yet. All I knew was that I wanted Isabella Swan in a way I had never wanted anyone else. Alice and Rose stood patiently as I paced and tried to work through everything going on inside me.

"I don't understand what's happening," I blurted out. "She's Edward's and I have no right to feel the things that I do for her. What would even happen if I told her? She has so much to deal with already and the last thing I want to do is complicate things even further. Yes I like her. I more than like her. God help me I'm pretty sure that in the short time I've been around her I've started falling in love with her."

I looked at my sisters pleading with them with my eyes to help me. I was so far out of my depth with all of this and I needed them.

Alice squealed and launched herself at me, nearly knocking me down as she hugged me fiercely. I looked at Rose in confusion and she just smiled and shook her head. Alice backed away and the smile on her face was the first genuine one I had seen from her in so long I couldn't help but return it.

"She's not Edward's,' Rose said. "I'm not sure she ever was, but now? No,not anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"Things are different now. She's been through a lot in the time we've been gone. Tragedy like that changes a person.

"I'm aware of this, Rose. What's your point?"

"My point, brother dear, is that SHE is different now. She's shifted from being the girl that Edward was destined to be with into something else; someone else."

I replayed her words again and again in my head attempting to see what it was she was trying to tell me. It didn't take too long before it all clicked together. When Alice and I split up she had told me that everything that was happening was meant to and that eventually all would be as it should. I had no idea what she meant at the time but it made sense now. She sent me here under the guise of being the only one who would be able to help Bella with the emotional turmoil she would be in, but that wasn't the real reason at all.

"She's my mate," I whispered, not sure I believed my own words.

"What was that?" Alice asked. "I'm not sure I heard that right."

A huge smile broke out across my face as I looked at the two stunning vampires before me.

"She's my mate!" I said again, this time with conviction, actually believing the words I spoke.

I picked my sisters up and spun them around, laughing as I did so. I had always been happy with Alice, there was no denying that, but I had longed to have what I saw between Esme and Carlisle and Rosalie and Emmett. I had always felt that being denied my mate was the universe's way of punishing me for the horrible things I had done in my life. I was never so happy to be proved wrong.

My happiness at this revelation was, unfortunately, short lived. While I was able to accept the fact that Bella was my mate with ease, she was still human and might not be as receptive to the idea. I put Rose and Alice down and resumed my pacing. They looked on with concern at my quick change of mood.

"How the fuck am I supposed to tell her this? How do you tell someone that you tried to eat that they're your soul mate and you're meant to spend eternity together? Fuck! She's still in love with my brother! She's never going to accept me as her mate."

I was about to resume my pacing when a voice I hadn't heard in far too long came from just inside the tree line.

"Jesus Christ, Major! Stop acting like Edward and man the fuck up! That little firecracker sleeping in that house already has a pussy, she doesn't need another one!"

My smile returned as my Captain, best friend, and brother in all the ways that matter stepped out into the open, followed by his beautiful mate.

"He's right, sugar. Now, how are we gonna get you your girl?"

I approached them, snatching Charlotte off of her feet and hugging her tightly. Peter held his hand out to me once I put her down. I took it and he pulled me in for a much more manly, one armed hug.

"It's been too long, brother" he said.

"It really has. But as happy as I am to see you both, what are you doing here?"

"Because you need help," he said as though it should have been obvious.

In all reality it should have been. Peter was gifted like Alice, Edward, and I were. He just knew things. It was odd the way his gift worked. He didn't get visions or hear thoughts or get a feeling about something, he just knew. The things he knew were absolute. It wasn't like Alice's visions that could change if someone made a different decision or changed their mind about something.

"You're not wrong about that," I said through a sigh. "Do you _know_ anything useful?"

"Of course I do, Major!" he exclaimed as he threw his arm over my shoulder and started to walk back toward the house, pulling me along with him. "Before I tell you anything though I think I'd like to meet my new sister. Or would she be my new mommy? You are essentially my dad since you are the one who changed me."

I rolled my eyes at his asinine train of thought. I loved this man as though he was my own blood but he could be infuriating at times. He was so much like Emmett in the sense that he rarely took anything seriously. If Pete was serious about something then you knew it was time to be concerned.

"Let's go with sister. I'm not sure she'd appreciate a grown man that's about one hundred years her elder calling her mommy!"

I shoulder checked him and took off past him and jumped the river. He caught up and as we ran he said, "In all seriousness, Jazz, I'm happy you finally found her. Your situation sucks on so many levels but know that once the dust settles everything will be just fine. I _know_ it _._ "

"Thanks, man. Knowing that definitely helps ease some of the tension I'm feeling from all of this."

"Have you decided when and how you're gonna let the little one know you're her mate?"

"No fucking idea, dude. Wanna help me out with that since I know you already _know_?"

He laughed and shook his head, "Where's the fun in that? I will tell you this though, only because I know if I don't you'll put this off for as long as you can because you still think she's in love with Edward. You have to tell her before he comes back."

"Do you know when that will be?"

We had made it back to the house and were walking at a human pace through the back yard.

"Yes, but I'm not telling you. The more you feel like there's an axe hanging over your head the quicker you'll tell her how you feel about her."

"Oh and Alice," he continued, "don't you say anything either."

"I don't even know when he's coming yet, Peter," she said from behind us. "He hasn't decided anything yet. Oh!"

I turned at the noise of surprise that came from her and saw that she had been sucked into a vision. I looked at Peter who simply smiled and shrugged.

 _Damn know it all!_


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello my lovelies! Let me start by profusely apologizing for the epic break I've taken from this story! I didn't mean to be gone this long but as we all know, real life happens. In any event I'm back with chapter 10 for your reading pleasure. Please remember I do my own editing and if any mistakes are found I apologize in advance. Enjoy!**

The sun wasn't even up yet when my eyes fluttered open. I saw immediately that someone had opened the shutters on the back of the house. The room was still blanketed in darkness and since there was no clock I had no idea what time it was. I stretched and groaned when I felt a small amount of pain from my ribs but they didn't hurt nearly as bad as they had the morning before. They must not have been broken after all. I stood from the bed and padded to the bathroom, closing the door behind me. Once I finished washing my face and brushing my teeth I debated on whether or not to get dressed before I made my way downstairs. My stomach rumbling decided for me that it could wait until after breakfast.

I opened the door and before I could take two steps my tiny best friend was standing in front of me with a warm but sad smile on her face. Her eyes shone with the venom tears that would never fall. She looked so sad and in that moment it didn't matter that she had abandoned me. All that I cared about was that I needed her and she was here. The tears that had gathered in my eyes the second I saw her began to fall and she launched herself at me, hugging me as tightly as she dared.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. You have no idea how much I wish I could take it all back, but I can't, and I'm so sorry," she sobbed.

I hugged her back just as fiercely. I didn't want to let go. I was terrified that if I did she would disappear.

After a few minutes of us embracing and crying I pulled away, my eyes never leaving her.

"I'm sorry I didn't see any of this sooner," she said referring to Charlie I'm sure. "Edward made me promise when we left not to look into your future. I tried to respect his wishes but sometimes the visions just come to me. That was why I didn't see what was going to happen until it was too late to prevent it. I hope you know that I would never ignore a vision like that on purpose. Regardless of what my idiot brother says."

"I know you wouldn't Alice. Please don't blame yourself for this. It's not your fault. Any of it!"

She nodded but it didn't look like she believed me. I knew the members of this family well enough by now to now that they would blame themselves, at least partly, for the death of my father.

"Come on. Esme is making you breakfast."

"What time is it?"

"It's eight-thirty."

"There's no way. It's dark outside. The sun should have come up more than an hour ago!"

She giggled lightly as she led me down the stairs.

"It's eight-thirty at night."

I stopped moving, almost falling over since she had an iron grip on my hand.

"Why did you let me sleep all that time?"

"Because you needed it, darlin'."

The sound of Jasper's voice startled me and I jumped about a foot into the air. He was standing so close to me I could smell him. I loved the way he smelled; like honeysuckle, leather, and just… man. It was warm and comforting, which is why I think I felt so at ease being close to him.

"What the hell, Jasper? You scared the shit out of me!" I yelled at him when I came back to myself.

He chuckled and brushed a stray lock of hair from my face that had fallen when I jumped. I was completely conscious of the fact that his wife was still standing there holding my hand but I couldn't control the way my heart fluttered in my chest at that simple gesture.

 _Stupid, traitorous, human body!_

"I'm sorry," he said with sincerity. "I didn't mean to scare you."

The way he was looking at me was making it difficult not to turn into a puddle of goo at his feet. I shook my head and closed my eyes.

"It's alright. Just make some noise next time."

He followed behind us as we finished our descent of the stairs and made our way to the kitchen. I could smell bacon as soon as I opened my bedroom door and now that I was within hearing distance I could hear the sound of the grease crackling in the pan as Esme pushed it around with her spatula.

I was surprised to find everyone sitting around the large table that adorned the Cullen's kitchen. I knew some kind of important conversation was coming. That was the only time this table was ever used. Carlisle sat at the head of the table as always. The seats on either side of him were empty. The one to his left was where Esme would sit; Edward sat in the one on the right. When we entered the room Alice took the vacant chair next to Edward's. Directly across from her was Rosalie with Emmett to her right in the seat beside Esme's empty one. Jasper took a seat at the foot of the table and it was then that I realized there were two vampires I didn't recognize sitting at the table. A blonde woman was sitting next to Alice with an empty seat between her and Jasper. On Jasper's left was a man that reminded me so much of Emmett they could have been brothers. Their red eyes made me slightly wary but I knew that the Cullens wouldn't let anything happen to me. They never would have allowed these two into their home with me sleeping upstairs if they didn't trust them.

The click of the knob turning to shut the burners on the stove off drew my attention away from the inhumanly beautiful group of people in front of me. Esme approached me carefully, like one would a startled kitten. She sat my plate and a coffee mug down on the table in front of the empty seat beside Jasper. She stood there for a moment fidgeting with her hands. It was such a human thing for her to do and I wondered if she even realized she was doing it.

She looked at me with hope in her eyes as she held her arms open, silently asking for a hug. There was no way I could resist and flew into her arms. She closed them around me and held me tightly; whispering soft words of comfort to me as I wept on her shoulder. I wasn't even sure why I was crying. There were too many events of late to choose from.

"I'm so sorry, precious girl. I'm sorry about what we did to you. You must have been so hurt by our actions. I promise you here and now that I will never do anything to cause you pain like that again. You are a part of this family and we treated you so poorly. What we did was awful but I hope someday you can find it in yourself to forgive us for our behavior. I'm also very sorry about Charlie. I wish there was something we could have done to keep this tragedy from happening but fate had other plans I suppose. We will get through this, my daughter. Together. As a family."

I pulled away and smiled as she placed a soft kiss to my tear soaked cheek. She pulled my chair out and motioned for me to sit. I did as she requested and breathed deeply, bringing the smell of bacon, French toast, hash browns and coffee into my nose. It smelled amazing and I was famished. I picked up my fork and before I could take a bite I realized I was being stared at… by ALL of them.

"Any particular reason you're all watching me like I'm a monkey using tools for the first time?" I asked.

Jasper's lips twitched and Emmett guffawed loudly, breaking the tension in the room. I giggled as the looks of shame on everyone's faces morphed into ones of amusement.

"No, but seriously, what's up? I know you guys don't use this table for every day chit chat."

"Eat first, Bella and then we'll discuss what needs to be done," Carlisle said, sadness creeping into his voice toward the end of his sentence.

I nodded and dug in to my food. I moaned quietly at the taste. For someone who hadn't eaten human food since the twenties, Esme was a genius in the kitchen. As I ate I looked around the table to see that everyone had started talking amongst themselves rather than stare at me and I was grateful for it. Well, everyone except Jasper. He was looking at me again with those dark intense eyes with emotions I didn't understand at the time swimming in their depths. I was having a hard time trying to look away but the sound of my name broke me from my haze and I focused my attention on Emmett, which is who had said it.

"Does that actually taste good?" he asked.

"Of course it does. I wouldn't be eating it if it didn't."

"It smells nasty," he said wrinkling his nose in disgust to further demonstrate his distaste for the smell.

"Yes and I'm sure the bear with flea infested fur that bathes in the fishy river water would smell scrumptious to me," I replied, rolling my eyes for good measure.

"Good point, Bells. Still stinks though."

"Then it's a good thing you don't have to eat it," I said, shoving the last bite of French toast into my mouth and smiling with my mouth closed.

I got up to take my plate to the sink but Esme took it from me and told me to sit. She sat the plate in the sink, which she had filled with soapy water and returned to the table.

Everyone looked to Carlisle and waited patiently for him to speak. He took a deep breath and looked at me with sorrow filled eyes.

"Bella, on behalf of my family I owe you quite an apology. What we did in leaving you was a huge mistake on our part and I don't have words enough to describe just how sorry we are for that. We accepted you as a part of this family and as such it was our duty to protect you. As my daughter it was MY duty and I have failed you miserably in that regard. I can only hope that, as Esme said, one day you will find it in your heart to forgive us. Being away from you these last months has shown us that we need you in our lives in whatever way you will have us. If you still want us around then please know that you have my word that we will never leave you behind again, unless you wish it. If you want us to go, then we are prepared to do that as well. All you have to do is say the word. That being said we won't be going anywhere until the threat of Victoria is handled and we can do so knowing you will be safe."

The tears were coming again as I listened to his heartfelt apology and I felt the wound in my chest begin to close a little more with each word that left his mouth. I wanted them to stay. I wanted them to continue being a part of my life because I loved them and with Charlie and Renee gone they were the only family that I had left. I had a few things I needed to say to them before I told them that though.

"Thank you for apologizing and thank you for coming. I know it couldn't have been easy defying Edward's wishes and coming back here for me. Leaving me behind without so much as a goodbye made me feel as though none of you cared for me at all. It broke me in a way that I will never be able to describe to you. I mourned the loss like you had all died rather than just moved away. Of course now that I have experienced it I think mourning a death is easier. When someone dies you know that their leaving you wasn't a choice they made. They're gone from the world and there's nothing you can do to change that. You grieve that person but eventually the pain lessens and you learn to move on without them knowing that no matter what happens they will always be with you. When you left it was a choice. You CHOSE to leave me behind and never look back. I knew you were out there in the world somewhere and it pained me to think that your lives were moving on like nothing had happened while my entire world stood still. But I can't hate you, any of you, for it. Being that you all thought I was Edward's mate you went along with what he thought was best for me even if you didn't agree and Jasper has informed me that most of you didn't. I already know that I will be able to forgive you because right now, when I need you all the most, you're here. That's what really matters. So, I want you to stay. You are the only family I have left in this world and I hate the idea of carrying on with my life without you in it."

I stood from my seat and, with blurry tear filled eyes, went to Carlisle and wrapped my arms around his neck. He pulled me down into his lap and wrapped his arms around me, hugging me back. He lightly stroked my head as I cried, telling me everything would be ok and that I was his daughter and he loved me.

"Awww… I think I'm gonna cry," came a sarcastic voice I didn't recognize. I turned just in time to see Jasper smack the red eyed male in the back of the head and call him a dick.

"I'm sorry, little one. I just can't take all this heavy emotional crap. It brings me down and I needed to lighten the mood a bit."

He smiled at me and I couldn't help but smile back. I shifted in Carlisle's lap so I could look at everyone, not ready to move from the comfort of his embrace just yet. When I looked at Jasper I saw what I thought was a flash of jealousy as he watched me with Carlisle but it was so fleeting I thought I must have imagined it. Besides what could he possibly be jealous about?

"Who are you?" I had asked the question rather rudely and slapped my hand over my mouth in embarrassment for asking it that way. "I'm so sorry. That was rude."

He chuckled and shook his head. "No apology necessary, sugar. I'm not offended in the slightest. I'm Peter Whitlock and that there is my mate and wife Charlotte. We're old friends of this pain in the ass." He jerked his thumb toward Jasper who just rolled his eyes but he was smiling.

"It's nice to meet you both. Japer told me a bit about you guys yesterday when he told me his story. I owe you a thank you for rescuing him from that awful woman all those years ago."

"Oh? And why would you be thanking us for that?" Peter asked.

"Because I would have missed out on one hell of a friend if you hadn't."

I smiled at Jasper even though calling him my friend didn't feel right.

I had lay awake in bed the previous night for what felt like hours thinking about him. We had known each other for quite some time now but up until his return we had never had much interaction. I knew that if we had then we would have become quite close. Now that I knew him better I could see why Alice had fallen in love with him. He was charming and witty, not to mention absolutely gorgeous. He was self conscious about the scars he carried but I found them beautiful and they just showed one more amazing quality to add to the very long list. He was a survivor. I felt so guilty for the fact that I had started to develop feelings for him that were very much outside of the realm of that of siblings. I had chalked it up to a small crush or some type of hero worship since he had saved my life but deep down I knew it was more than that.

I was falling for him and the fall was quick. Unfortunately I knew he wouldn't be there to catch me.

"You're more than welcome, sugar. He is a pretty great guy, isn't he?"

 _You have no idea how right you are, Peter._

"Yeah, yeah, I'm great. Carlisle please feel free to continue at any time," Jasper said looking a bit like he would be blushing if he could. I felt Carlisle's body shaking with silent laughter, completely forgetting I was still sitting on his lap. I moved and took my original seat next to Jasper, waiting for whatever was next on the agenda to be discussed.

Rather than Carlisle it was Esme who spoke.

"Bella I contacted Charlie's attorney this morning. He will be here tomorrow morning at nine to go over his will with you. Since you are his only child he left everything to you so this is really just a formality at this point. I also spoke with the funeral director. We have an appointment with him tomorrow as well but not until one o'clock. I thought it best to get all of this out of the way quickly. We'll need to go to the house beforehand to pick out something for him to wear."

"His uniform," I said. "I want him buried in his uniform. He loved his job. It was who he was and I think it's only right that that be what he wears forever."

Esme gave me a watery smile and nodded. "Ok, sweetheart. They also said something about pictures. Did you guys keep family photo albums that we could go through?"

"Yes. He has several that he kept in a locked fireproof cabinet under the couch in the living room. I don't know where the key is though."

"That's not an issue, honey."

I realized that after I had already said the words. She would just break the lock if she had to. It's not like the box itself was important.

"Billy probably has some too," I said. "Dad spent most of his free time on the reservation with him so there's bound to be pictures somewhere. I can call him and ask."

"That's a good idea," she agreed.

I hated the idea of having to go through all those pictures to make memory boards. Looking through all of those memories, knowing that there would be no more, was making me want to throw up and I hadn't even started yet.

 _No more fishing trips._

 _No more baseball games._

 _No more cookouts at the Blacks'._

 _No more._

 _No more._

 _No more._

I was starting to breath heavily and my eyes were quickly losing focus. I knew what this was. I was having an anxiety attack. I tried and tried to bring air into my lungs but it just wasn't enough. The tears were flowing again and I was losing it, not knowing how to make it stop. I stood from my seat and made to go outside; hoping the fresh air and the cold would calm me down. I didn't make it three steps before my legs gave out and I was falling.

Cold, stone arms caught me before I hit the floor and I immediately recognized that it was Jasper that had caught me. I had spent most of the last two days in his arms so they were familiar. As soon as I registered his scent I started to calm but I still couldn't catch my breath. My heart started to calm itself and my vision began to regain focus.

"Breath with me, Bella," he said holding me against his chest so I could feel the movement.

His breathing was exaggerated so that I could feel it better and I tried to do as he asked.

"That's it. Slow and steady, darlin'. You're ok. That's my girl. Keep breathing like that."

After a few minutes I was able to breathe normally. I felt better but I was exhausted. Who knew that freaking out like that could be so exhausting?

I could hear everyone's quiet murmurs as they talked at a pace and frequency my human ears couldn't pick up on. I couldn't find it in me to care what they were saying.

"Are you alright now, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

I nodded in response.

"Ok, enough for right now. We have other matters to discuss but it can wait. Jasper, please take Bella to the living room while I get my bag. I still need to take care of that hand."

Jasper stood with me in his arms and walked to living room. He sat down on the couch and maneuvered me so I was still in his lap but in a more comfortable position. I should have moved, thinking that Alice probably wouldn't appreciate me being so cozy with her husband, but I didn't. I was tired and honestly I didn't want to be anywhere else.

Carlisle entered the room and sat himself on the coffee table in front of us. He looked at my hand and grimaced. He poked and prodded and moved my hand this way and that trying to get a sense of where exactly it was broken. It hurt like hell. He looked up at me and sighed.

"We're going to have to go to the hospital, Bella. I need an x-ray to see the extent of the damage. There's a good chance you're going to have to have surgery to fix this. It might have been fine with just the broken fingers from your visitor but punching that wolf caused quite a mess."

"So worth it," I mumbled.

My comment was met by loud laughter from Emmett and Peter. Jasper was shaking with his own laughter and I could see the smirk on Carlisle's face that he was trying, and failing, to hide.

"How have you gone all this time without taking care of this?" Carlisle asked. "This must be terribly painful."

I opened my mouth to give him an answer but realized I didn't have one. In all honesty I kept forgetting my hand was even broken. It would hurt every now and again, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that, with the exception of just a few minutes ago, it only ever really hurt when I was alone. I turned slightly in Jasper's lap and looked at him questioningly.

He gave me a sheepish grin then looked at Carlisle to give the answer that I could not.

"I'm afraid that's my doing," he said. "When she refused to go have it looked at I started absorbing as much of her pain as I could as often as I could."

Our trip to the ER was, as far as hospital visits go, fairly quick. Jasper had wanted to come along but I refused. The emotional climate in a hospital was probably terrible at best, not to mention the possibility of free flowing blood. It was needless pain and I wouldn't allow him to put himself in that predicament because I was stubborn and hadn't done this when I should have.

I took the time to call Billy while we waited for the results of my x-ray. He promised to go through all of the pictures he had tonight and said I could pick them up in the morning before I went to the funeral home.

When the doctor came in to give us my results the news was actually good and I didn't need surgery. I would have to wear a cast but I wasn't going to complain. That was much better than the alternative. Once they finished with my cast the doctor brought in a prescription for pain medicine, along with after care instructions, and then sent us on our way.

Japer was waiting on the porch when we pulled into the driveway and was at my door before Carlisle came to a complete stop.

"What did they say?" he asked

"Oh it's very broken," I answered. "But I don't need surgery, just this lovely new accessory for awhile."

I held up my arm to show him my shiny new hot pink cast.

Jasper nodded and helped me out of the car.

"Did they give you anything for the pain?"

"They did but I can't fill it until tomorrow."

Once I was inside I said goodnight to everyone and headed to my room. I had slept the day away but I was still exhausted. My attack earlier hadn't helped matters and all I wanted to do was fall into bed. I still had my pajamas on so that's exactly what I did.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello again, my lovelies! I decided to give you chapter 11 early as an apology for my long absence. Thank you to those of you who reviewed/favorited/alerted this story and welcome to all of my new readers! You're all rock stars!**

JPOV

The next few days were an emotional whirlwind.

Charlie's lawyer showed up on our doorstep at exactly nine o'clock the next morning. Just as we had known everything was left to Bella. It was what the "everything" entailed that had us all reeling. The chief had taken out some pretty hefty life insurance policies on himself since he knew what he did for a living was dangerous. There were three, two that he had purchased himself plus the one he had through work. The one that he had through work paid double since he was killed while on duty. Between them, Bella had enough money to pay for his funeral and live comfortably for, quite possibly, the rest of her life.

Once that meeting was over, Esme fed her some lunch and then she and I took her to the funeral home. I sent Peter to her house while we were gone to retrieve the photo albums so she didn't have to do it.

I was less than thrilled at the idea of her going to the reservation by herself but none of us could follow. Peter offered to go since he hadn't made any promises to the mutts but Carlisle wouldn't allow it.

I wore down the grass in the front yard with my pacing waiting for her to return. After Jacob had tried to force her to go to the reservation with him that day I didn't trust him and I was concerned beyond belief when, after two hours, she still hadn't returned.

Alice's inability to see her made me more anxious but Peter kept assuring me that he _knew_ she was fine.

When she finally made it home she was a mess and it took me hours to get her calmed down. I knew someone had said something to upset her but she refused to tell me.

"Just let it go, Jasper. It doesn't even matter," she had said.

It mattered to me but I didn't want to piss her off so I didn't ask her about it again.

The next day was spent going through all of the pictures Bella and Charlie had acquired over the years. I could feel her sadness as she flipped the pages of the photo albums, but it was trumped by the love she felt as she remembered and the happiness that the memories brought. She was healing bit by bit and I liked to think that I had a little something to do with that.

Most of the time we were together. I didn't have it in me to be too far away from her for too long. Sometimes we would just sit quietly together and read. Other times we would talk, allowing us to gain more and more insight into each other's lives and who we were as people. I still had yet to get her to tell me what Edward said to her the night he left but I knew that, given time, she would eventually be able to say the words.

The following day was spent cleaning and getting Bella's house back in order. She had insisted that we hold the wake there, mainly for the comfort of the pack. We had offered to hold it at our house but she had refused, arguing that the wolves and probably even Billy Black would not come if we had it here.

The day before the funeral was the hardest by far. The realization of what would be happening the next day weighed heavily on my Bella and she kept to herself, refusing even my company, most of the day.

Esme kept busy in the kitchen, cooking massive amounts of food to feed the mourners that would be present at Bella's the next day. Emmett and Peter attempted to help but they were more of a hindrance than anything so Esme eventually kicked them out.

Alice and Rose spent the day in Seattle shopping for what everyone would wear to the funeral.

Peter and Charlotte decided not to attend. Victoria was still on the loose and they decided they would be of better use keeping watch for her. Honestly it would be just Bella's luck to have her attack at her father's funeral.

That left me, sitting in a chair in the living room staring at the ceiling, willing Bella to call for me or give me some kind of indication she wanted me with her. It was killing me to sit here and listen to her cry, being able to do nothing to comfort her.

After a few hours I grew restless and took off into the woods by myself to hunt. I hadn't gone since the day I took Bella and I would be surrounded by humans the next day so I needed this. I didn't pay much attention to where I was going, instead honing in on the sounds and smells to find an acceptable meal.

I came to a sudden stop when I caught a scent, but it wasn't an animal. I had crossed the very fresh scent of a vampire; one I didn't recognize. I followed the scent in the direction it was the strongest and before long I found myself standing in Bella's back yard. I hid myself in a tree at the edge of the yard and watched for any sign of movement inside. I couldn't see anything but the sound of extremely light footsteps coming from the second floor told me that whoever I had smelled was still in the house. My military brain kicked in as I assessed the situation, going through every possible way to subdue the intruder before they could sense my presence and get away.

I settled on a plan but before I could execute it a male vampire exited the back door. I jumped from my perch and tackled him to the ground, pinning him beneath me. He looked at me wide eyed and I could feel his fear rolling off of him in waves.

"Who are you and what the fuck are you doing here?" I said in a deadly calm voice.

I sensed Peter's presence before I saw him break through the tree line.

"Well, well. What do we have here, Major?" he asked me.

The vampire just stared at me, the fear all but gone, replaced with anger and a little bit of embarrassment at getting caught.

He was taking too long to answer me and I growled, low and menacing. I grabbed him by his hair and slammed his head into the ground.

"I asked you a question, boy."

"I'm not telling you shit!" he yelled. He turned his head and sunk his teeth into my arm yanking a chunk of my arm out. I hissed in pain but didn't let go of him. I'd had much worse and this little shit had no idea who he was fucking with.

"See, now that was a really bad idea," Peter said from beside me. "I once watched this man kill a coven of twelve vampires after his arm had been torn off. I would suggest you not try anything like that again."

His fear returned but he didn't let it show outwardly. Instead, since sometimes fear makes people do stupid shit, he laughed and spit in my face.

I wanted to tear him to pieces but I needed information. I decided instead to fill him with the cocktail of emotions I used to use to bring the newborns I trained into submission. I stood up and brushed the dirt off of my clothes as I watched him writhe in agony and despair.

"Ok, I'll talk. Just please stop."

"We need to move him, Major. Little one has neighbors and they could walk outside and see us at any minute."

I nodded and lifted the male up off the ground by his hair and dragged him into the forest. When I felt we were far enough to not draw attention I dropped him and drew back enough of my influence that he could talk but not enough that he could get far if he made a run for it. As I looked down at him a bit of pink fabric from inside his jacket caught my attention. I reached down and yanked it out of his inside pocket, growling as the scent of my mate hit me full force. This was one of her shirts.

"Start talking!" I yelled at him.

"Riley," he whimpered. "My name is Riley."

"What are you doing here? Who sent you?"

"Victoria, my mate. She sent me here to get something with the human girl's scent on it. She needs it for the others."

"Mate?" I asked, laughing at him. "Oh, Riley you poor fool. Victoria isn't your mate. Her mate was killed last year."

"Liar!" he yelled.

I pushed more of my influence on him. His back arched off the ground as he begged me to stop. I pulled it back again.

"What's her plan?" Peter asked. "How many others are there?"

"More than you can handle," he gritted out through his teeth.

"I think you're gonna have to step it up, Major. I don't think he's had enough to loosen his lips just yet."

Riley's eyes widened as I descended on him and his scream could probably be heard for a mile as I tore his arm from his body. I tossed it to Peter and crouched down next to him, leaning in close.

"I will tear you limb from limb if you don't start telling me what I want to know. Now, you are going to tell me everything and when you are done I MIGHT just let you live. Talk!"

"She's wants revenge because one of you killed her coven mate. She made a bunch of us so she wouldn't be out numbered when she comes for your coven."

"Why did she want Bella's scent?"

"She's giving it to the others as incentive. She told them that the human girl would be with you and whoever got to her first could have her."

"How many of you are there?"

"Twenty five counting the two of us."

I looked to Peter and I knew that he was thinking the same thing I was. Newborn army. That's exactly what Victoria had done. I found it odd that there wasn't anything in the news about a mass of missing persons reported but she was probably being smart about it. She would most likely be turning people that no one would miss. Then again that many newborns would be wreaking havoc wherever they were. That would not go unnoticed by the humans.

"This is bad, Major."

"It's nothing we can't handle, Captain. Now what do we do with this?" I asked kicking Riley's foot.

"Burn it," he shrugged.

"I was thinking the same thing. Care to do the honors?"

"Wait!" Riley yelled. "You said if I talked you would let me live!"

"I said I might let you live. Given what you told me I don't think you deserve to."

I stood from my crouch and reached into my pocket, pulling out the Zippo I always kept on hand. I debated on pulling off another limb but there was no need as the place where his arm had been torn off was still seeping venom. I flipped the lighter opened and used my leg to light it. I tossed it at him, feeling a satisfaction as his body burst into flames.

As I watched the flames burn out I thought about what was coming. There were twenty three newborn vampires coming for us and my mate and we were severely outnumbered. As much as I hated to admit it we needed Edward home. Of course calling him home would mean that I needed to tell Bella how I felt.

Ever since I realized she was my mate I was having a hard time keeping it from her. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops but I kept quiet, giving her time to grieve her father's death before I decided to spring this on her. I was worried she would reject me.

It was then, standing in the middle of the forest, the stench of Riley's death burning my nose, that I realized my fears were unfounded. Yes she was human but she would still feel the mating pull. Not to the extent that I felt it but it was still there. That's why she sought comfort in me and enjoyed being in my arms just as much as I enjoyed having her there.

I took off into the forest with a laughing Peter hot on my heels.

"Took you long enough," he said

I didn't respond. I just smiled and pushed myself harder and faster than I ever had before. Desperate to get to my mate.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello, Lovelies! Here it is, the chapter you've all been waiting for. I hope you enjoy! Thank you for the reviews, alerts, and favorites!**

BPOV

I flopped onto my back and sighed heavily. I had isolated myself from everyone in the hopes of clearing my head but it was all in vain.

I'm sure that everyone thought I was up here all alone due to the fact that I would be saying my final goodbye to my father the next day. If I was being honest I didn't even want to go to the funeral. I had said my goodbyes before I left the hospital that day and had been working through letting him go in my own way. Why did I have to put on a show for the rest of the town? In truth that was the only reason I was doing this. It wasn't me that needed to say goodbye it was everyone else that loved, cared for, and respected the man that had devoted his life to protecting them. I didn't even know if this is what Charlie would have wanted. It's not like we ever sat down and talked about any of this.

No, that was not why I was up here all alone.

Pain shot through my broken hand, telling me that the reason for my self-inflicted quarantine must have left the house. I hadn't felt the pain from my injuries since the day I went to the reservation and I had forgotten how badly it hurt. I sat up, reaching for the little orange bottle of pills I had yet to touch and opened it. I held the oblong white pill with red flecks in between my thumb and forefinger and marveled at the fact that something so small and unassuming could do so much for someone in pain. This made me return to my previous thoughts about Jasper.

He was like that little pill in a way. Where it was small he was just quiet and had done wonders for the pain I had been experiencing, and I don't just mean physically. The moment he had returned I had at the very least started to feel better. Every day the darkness I was living in seemed to get a little bit brighter. He was like my own personal flashlight, giving me a means to find my way out of such a dark and hopeless place.

I sighed again, coming back to the reason I was up here all alone. I had to stop thinking of him in such a way. He was married to my gorgeous best friend and I had no right to be thinking of him in the way I had been. Alice hadn't seemed to give much thought to our closeness over the last few days. In fact she seemed happy about it but I chalked that up to the fact that she was glad that her husband and best friend were finally able to forge some kind of relationship.

A soft knock on the door to my room pulled me from my musings. I wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone so I hoped whoever was on the other side of the door was only here to check on me and leave rather than want to have a conversation.

"Come in," I said softly, knowing whoever was there would hear me.

The door opened and Alice stepped into the room, followed by Charlotte. The fact that she closed the door behind her revealed that they were not just checking on me.

"Hi, Bella!" Alice greeted cheerfully as she skipped across the room, gracefully flinging herself onto the bed next to me.

Charlotte took a less flamboyant approach, simply giving me a small smile and sitting lightly on the edge of my bed.

I tried to fake a smile but I'm not sure how convincing it was.

"Hey, Alice."

"Why are you sitting up here all alone?" she asked.

"I just needed some time to myself." I wasn't lying. She just didn't need to know the reason why.

"I get that. I spent a lot of time by myself after Jasper and I split up. I mean I knew it was time but that didn't make it any less hard. We were together for like fifty years."

My head jerked up, my eyes no doubt the size of dinner plates. I heard what she said but I was having a hard time believing it.

"Come again? Did you just say you and Jasper split up? When? Why?"

"It wasn't long after we left Forks. Nothing significant happened. It was just time."

"But I thought vampires mated for life. The way that Edward explained it made me believe that you guys didn't go around dating all willy nilly like we meager humans do."

She shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"No that's just Edward. He refused to settle for anything less than his mate. Not all vampires are like that. Some of us choose to spend time with others to pass the time until our mate comes along. Eternity is a long time to spend alone."

I was far angrier at that statement than I should have been. The way she said it made it seem like Jasper was nothing but a place holder until something better came along. I doubted that was how she meant for me to take what she said but the fact was I had and I didn't like the idea of anyone using Jasper for any reason. It was wrong and cruel and just… NO!

"Oh, sugar, don't be upset." Charlotte said, obviously sensing my mood. "She didn't mean it the way it came out. She and Jasper loved each other very much. Still do I'd wager. It's just not that forever kind of love you're so used to seeing."

When Alice realized her mistake she rushed to explain.

"We were never meant for forever, Bella. We were meant to spend the time together that we did simply to prepare him for his mate. Up until he found me in that diner that day he didn't understand what it was like to be in a relationship. At least not a loving one. If I had just allowed him to go on like he was he would have eventually found his way to the lifestyle he's leading right now but it would have taken much longer. He also never would have been forced to understand how to be gentle and he would have killed you by accident just trying to touch your face. He owes me big time for that I think. Maybe I can get him to buy me a Porsche. I've always wanted one…"

She continued chatting away but I wasn't paying attention. I was stuck on the fact that she had said "he would have killed YOU by accident". I had no idea if she meant to say that or not but in my experience vampires didn't do anything by accident.

"Umm… Alice?" I asked, interrupting her monologue. "What did you mean just now? When you said Jasper would have killed me by accident?"

She looked at me like I had grown a second head.

"That's what you said. You said '…he would have killed YOU by accident…' and I doubt that was a slip. What have you seen, Alice?"

She looked at Charlotte and they both seemed to panic for a minute before regaining their composure.

"Well, I just meant that since you guys have been so close, ya know?"

"Right, well that makes sense," I said, my heart deflating as the hope I hadn't realized her words created left my body in one fell swoop.

I wanted to slap myself. I knew that my feelings for Jasper had been developing at break neck speeds but that didn't mean he felt anything at all in return. There were signs that maybe he did. The way he had held me, the way he looked at me when he saw me naked, how worried he seemed to be when Carlisle and I had returned home from the hospital. I shook those thoughts away as quickly as they came. After spending fifty years with someone like Alice there was no way he'd ever be interested in little old plain Jane, clumsy, nothing special, human me. Or could he?

They both looked relieved that I seemed to accept her explanation. Part of me had believed her words without question since that was what made the most sense. Another part wanted to call bullshit but I let the subject drop.

"Was there something in particular you wanted, Alice?" I asked. "I had to take one of those pain pills and I'm a little sleepy from it."

"No," she said with a sad smile. "We just wanted to hang out with you for awhile. We'll go though so you can take a nap. Maybe when you wake up we could watch a movie or something?"

"I'd like that," I replied smiling at them.

I was awake in less than an hour. I was still drowsy from the medicine but I refused to even attempt to go back to sleep. My heart was racing and I was tingling all over from my latest unconscious encounter with the blonde southern man I was falling for.

The clock told me it was just after four in the afternoon and I was starving. After I made myself presentable I headed downstairs to find some food.

Charlotte, Alice, and to my extreme surprise, Rosalie, joined me in the kitchen while I made some fried chicken.

The task itself was a nice distraction. The company made it all the more enjoyable even if they all complained about the smell.

Once I had finished eating we all settled in the living room to watch a movie. I honestly had no idea what they had chosen since I wasn't really watching it; more just looking at the TV. My mind had once again drifted back to Jasper.

Now that I no longer had to feel guilty about my feelings for him I was able to focus more on how I actually felt rather than chastising myself for having any feelings for him in the first place.

I liked him, that much was a given. Could I be in love with him? We had only known each other on such a personal level for a short time. Was it too soon for that to be the case? It was possible. I knew pretty quickly that I loved Edward but as it turned out that was a sham of a relationship and I wasn't really sure that what I felt for him was actually love or just some kind of fascination. Why did this need to be so hard? Was it really necessary for feelings to be so damn complicated?

The sound of Jasper's voice yelling my name startled me back into reality. In fact it startled me right out of my seat. I was so deep in my thoughts that my body automatically reacted without my permission. I was understandably on edge given the fact that Victoria was still after me. I jumped up, scanning the room for what my subconscious mind thought was some type of threat, and prepared to run.

Within seconds, Jasper was standing in front of me, smiling like I had never seen him smile before. There were so many emotions in those mesmerizing amber eyes that I couldn't have named all of them if I had tried.

"For the love of God, Jasper! How many fucking times do I have to tell you not to scare me like that! I'm human, with a beating heart that can stop at any given moment-"

My tirade was cut off abruptly as Jasper grabbed the back of my head and crashed his lips against mine.

I was sure that, just for a second, my heart really did stop.

The shock of what was happening registered in my brain but my lips were all too happy to comply with his and I kissed him back. I was only vaguely aware of the catcalls and cheering going on around us, not caring that my first kiss with this amazing man was witnessed by our whole family.

It's hard to describe how it felt to kiss him. It was so different than it had been with Edward. His kisses had always been so chaste and cold. With Jasper, there was a heat that I had never experienced and given that he was a vampire and had no body heat that was saying something. His lips were hard against mine but still pliable and molded perfectly with my own. His tongue brushed against my bottom lip lightly, asking for permission to deepen the kiss. How could I deny him? I parted my lips and he slid his tongue into my mouth, gently stroking mine.

Much sooner than I would have liked, he slowed the kiss and pulled away. He rested his forehead against mine, his smile still in full swing and uttered one word.

"Wow!"

I simply nodded in agreement. My brain didn't have the capacity to form words just yet.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting to do that," he said, pressing his lips lightly to the end of my nose.

I looked up at him and just stared. I had questions, lots of them, but I didn't even know where to begin.

"Jasper, I-"

"Before you say anything let me say what I need to say. Bella, I love you. I'm not sure that your human mind can even begin to fathom how much. I know it seems sudden and with everything happening the last thing I wanted was to cause you more drama but I couldn't wait anymore. I needed to tell you. I kissed you before explaining anything because I'm terrified that you'll reject me and I couldn't go on with the rest of my existence without ever having my lips on yours. Even if it was just once. You, Isabella Swan, are my one and only. My soul mate. My forever. I know that since your human you might not feel the mating pull like I do, or at all for that matter, but I needed you to know. I love you! With everything in me, I love you."

I was stunned. What do you even say to something like that? I stood there and stared, seeing the rest the family from the corner of my eye waiting with bated breath for my response.

"Did you fall down and hit your head?" I asked. "Carlisle, is it possible for vampires to get brain damage?"

"Ummm, no sweetheart, it's not." Carlisle replied sounding just as confused as Jasper looked.

"Well, that's the only explanation I have for you thinking I would ever reject you, Jasper. I'm sure you're correct in assuming I don't feel the pull like you do but I do feel it. I have for awhile I just didn't have an explanation for what it was until now. All I knew was that I had feelings for my best friend's husband and the guilt over that ate at me. I tried to squash them but nothing worked. I remember thinking that I was falling so hard for you but you wouldn't be there to catch me."

"I'll always catch you, baby. I promise you that."

I smiled and kissed his lips lightly. "I love you, Jasper. I know in human society it's too soon to be saying that but I know what I feel. I don't want you to go another day not knowing that."

"I'm so happy!" Peter said in a voice that sounded like he was crying as he wiped a fake tear from his cheek.

Jasper and I rolled our eyes simultaneously and smiled as everyone around us started laughing.

Unfortunately, since my luck seemed to be that of someone who opened an umbrella in the house and shattered a mirror with it only to later walk under a ladder and trip over a black cat on Friday the 13th, the light and happy mood didn't last very long. My euphoria quickly took a nose dive into fear.

"Not to ruin everyone's day," Peter said, "but we have some news about Victoria."


	13. Chapter 13

JPOV

I could have punched him in the face. I knew that what happened at Bella's needed to be discussed but did it have to be RIGHT NOW? I sighed and sat down on the couch, pulling Bella down onto my lap. I needed her close while we talked about the psycho that wanted my mate dead. I needed to be able to touch her and know she was ok. It would keep me calm.

"What happened?" Carlisle asked.

"She isn't working alone," I said. "We found someone at Bella's. I caught his scent while I was out hunting and tracked him to her house. He said that Victoria has created an army of newborns and she's coming for us."

"Why didn't I see any of this?" Alice said mostly to herself as she got that far away look she always had when she was scanning the future. "I'm not seeing anything. I've been watching her like a hawk since we got back."

"She must have found a way around your gift," Carlisle said.

"But I would still see something that significant that involved our family."

We all sat quietly, contemplating Alice's blindness to the situation when my Bella spoke up.

"Not if the wolves are going to be involved."

Peter smiled that all knowing smile of his and everyone else looked at her like she was nuts. Why would the wolves be involved with anything that had to do with us?

"It actually makes sense if you think about it," Emmett said after a minute. "How many does she have?"

"Riley said there were twenty five including the two of them." I answered.

"Then that means we're outnumbered. It would make sense to ask the wolves for their help. This entire area is in danger with that many hungry newborns on the war path and I don't think the wolves would sit idly by and risk so many human lives; even if that means a truce between us to eliminate the threat."

Emmett was so much smarter than everyone gave him credit for.

"I can call Jake," Bella offered. Her emotions told me that was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Let's not worry about any of that right now," Esme interrupted. "I know these things need to be discussed and a plan put together but it can wait until after the funeral. Let's get through one thing at a time."

She was right and no one dared argue.

Bella yawned and laid her head on my shoulder, closing her eyes. I glance at the clock told me it was probably time to get her to bed. She had an exhausting day ahead of her.

"Sleepy, baby?" I asked her as I ran my fingers up and down her back.

She nodded. "I could sleep."

I placed an arm under her legs and one behind her back and stood, lifting her bridal style and carried her to her room.

I placed her in the bed and since she kept a tight hold on my shirt I slid in beside her, wrapping my arms around her as she laid her head on my chest.

"How are you feeling?" I asked her.

She turned her head and looked at me, smirking and raising an eyebrow at my question.

I laughed lightly. "I can feel what you're feeling but I don't know the reason behind it. I guess a better question is why are you feeling like you're feeling?"

"There's so much going on in my head, Jasper, that I'm not entirely sure I know the answer to that. I'm terrified of Victoria, I'm anxious about tomorrow. I don't even want to go. I don't want to deal with the nasty looks from Jake and the bullshit lectures from Billy. I said goodbye to Charlie already. Why do I have to put on a show for the whole town?"

"Darlin', you don't have to do anything. Do you remember what I told you the day I came home? No one is expecting you to act a certain way. If going to the funeral is not something you want to do then we won't go. I don't think Charlie would hold a grudge against you because you didn't want to sit and watch the town weep over a body he isn't in anymore anyway."

We lay quietly as she thought about what she wanted to do. I wasn't going to push her one way or the other. I wanted her to go but at the same time I wanted to take her away for the day and spend time doing everything I could to make her forget about everything that was going on in her life right now. Even if it was just for a little while.

She used her index finger to absently trace nonsensical patterns on my chest as she thought. I wasn't sure she even realized she was doing it but I was certainly enjoying it. I had never really been touched by a human before Bella. When I fed on them they would fight but I was always so lost in my need to feed that their clawing and hitting had never really registered with me. It was amazing that her fragile flesh was able to elicit such a reaction in me. Each stroke of her finger was comparable to what it felt like to have very hot water dripping down my body. It didn't hurt but it was a pleasurable heat that made me tingle all over.

She stopped and looked up at me. "I'll go to the service but I don't want to go back to the house after."

She offered no explanation as to why and I wasn't going to push. I simply nodded my head and she snuggled deeper into my chest; a content sigh escaping her lips. There was, however, something we needed to discuss. I was dreading broaching this subject with her but it had to be done.

"Bella, I have something I need to tell you."

"What's that?" she asked, sitting herself up a little so she could look at me.

"Edward will be coming home soon. We need him here with everything that's going on and Alice has seen his decision to return. He doesn't know we're here and he's more than likely going to be pretty angry that we went against his wishes and came back to Forks"

"I'm surprised his _distractions_ have bored him so much already," she scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Besides, you all made the promise to him that you wouldn't return because you all thought I was his mate and it was ultimately his decision. Well, I'm not his mate so his opinion doesn't matter."

She was right and I told her as much. In all honesty we should have known Bella wasn't his mate the moment he made the decision to leave her. Hell, when he risked her life to stop the change even! It just wasn't possible for us to be away from our mate for any length of time. The pull to be with them was too strong and caused actual physical pain if we ignored it. Why none of us realized this then is a mystery to me. We should have known. Her mention of his distractions intrigued me and I thought now might be a good time to bring up what she had thus far decided was a forbidden subject.

"Baby, what did he say to you that day?"

She sighed deeply and sat herself up completely. She pulled her legs up against her chest, resting her chin on her knees. Her position caused an overwhelming amount of anxiety in me. I knew from experience that this was the way she sat when she was trying to hold herself together when discussing something upsetting. I had a feeling when this conversation was over Victoria wasn't going to be the only vampire I would have the need to tear to pieces for hurting my mate.

She sighed once again and with tear filled eyes told me the story of how my asshat of a brother completely shattered her heart. I was appalled by the things she was saying. How could he do something like that to someone he claimed to love? We now knew that they were obviously not mates as we had all thought but that doesn't excuse the way he handled the situation. It was wrong on so many levels and he and I would definitely be having a discussion when he got home. I just hoped Esme would forgive me for the damage I would no doubt inflict on him when said discussion was had.

One lone tear escaped her left eye as she finished her story. The low growl that came from me, unbidden, caused her to brush it away quickly, shaking her head at herself.

"I don't mean to cry," she said apologetically. "I know now that Edward and I weren't meant to be but it still hurts to be told those things. No matter whom they come from."

"Darlin', never apologize for how you feel. I'll admit that I'm a little bothered that you're so visibly upset over another man but I can't help that. Mated vampires are possessive of their other half and since I'm new to this I don't know how to control it. I think you'll be able to understand a little better once you've been changed. As a vampire you'll feel everything so much stronger than you ever have as a human."

She didn't say anything, just looked at me in shock. I went back over everything that I had just said, worried that I had said something to upset her in some way.

"Bella? Baby, what's wrong?" I asked when I came up with nothing.

"You… you want to…" she was struggling to say what she needed to and I was still completely fucking lost.

She took a deep breath and smiled at me. "You want me to be changed?" she finally asked.

I knew I was looking at her like she was a mental patient. I couldn't help it. That had to have been the most ridiculous question anyone had ever asked me.

"What the hell kind of question is that?" I asked incredulously. "Of course you're going to be changed. You're my mate Bella. How else would this even work?"

"Edward was always so set on keeping me human so I just assumed…"

I cut her off. "Bella, stop. First of all I am not Edward. I don't have the same moral code as he does. I'm not afraid to admit that I am extremely selfish and I'm not a martyr. Second of all, Edward wasn't your mate. There was no way he would allow you to remain human if he was. A human lifetime with you isn't good enough for me. I want you forever. Now that I've found you, living without you just isn't an option, so yes, my Bella, my mate, I want you to become a vampire."

She didn't respond with words. Instead she crawled into my lap, straddling me and gently pressed her lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her as tight and close as I could without hurting her. She felt so good in my arms.

Our kiss quickly morphed from gentle and loving to heated and passionate. Without hesitation she allowed me to deepen the kiss. My tongue did to her mouth what my cock was dying to do to her pussy. She moaned into my mouth and ground herself down onto my nearing painful erection. I wanted her more than I could even begin to describe but I wasn't sure she was quite ready for that. That didn't mean I couldn't make her cum another way.

I broke our kiss, remembering that she needed to breathe, but my lips never left her skin. I trailed kisses across her cheek to her ear, taking the lobe into my mouth and sucking lightly, and then moved down her neck. Her head fell back to allow me access and she whispered my name in breathy moan. The sound made my cock twitch which in turn made her grind harder against me. I used the hand that wasn't holding her against me and slid it slowly up her shirt toward her breasts. I had noticed earlier that she wasn't wearing a bra and we both moaned as my cold hand came in contact with her heated flesh. I was right; they fit perfectly in my hands.

I claimed her mouth again as I rolled her nipple between my fingers, pulling on it just a little. The smell of her arousal was driving me crazy and I knew if I didn't slow this down I wasn't going to be able to stop and I would take her right here. Then again I didn't want to leave her hanging in the state that she was currently in.

Her movements sped and I could tell by her emotions that she was going to cum soon. I decided to help her along and I fed her a cocktail of emotions that never failed to do the job. Within seconds she was crying my name as she wrapped her arms around me tightly, trembling from the force of her orgasm.

Her breathing was heavy as her body calmed and I smiled into her neck, happy to have brought pleasure to my mate.

"Jesus, Jasper," she said breathlessly. "That was just…"

Her words failed her and I beamed with pride. _That's right baby, and there's plenty more where that came from._

Her emotions had calmed down drastically from what they had been when we started and I could tell she was sleepy even without my gift.

"Did you..?" she cut her question off as a bit of embarrassment seeped into her emotions. _So innocent._

"No baby and it's fine." I answered, knowing what she meant. "That was so much more about you than it was about me. You can get me next time," I joked, winking at her for good measure.

She giggled and laid her head on my shoulder.

"I love you, Jasper," she whispered as she placed a kiss to my neck.

My heart swelled at hearing her say those words. I'd never tire of hearing that.

"I love you too, Bella. More than anything."

It was just a few minutes before she was sound asleep. I maneuvered her off of me as gently as I could to avoid waking her. I stood from the bed and covered her with a blanket, placing a feather light kiss to her cheek. I stood there for a moment just watching the rise and fall of her chest and listening to the steady beat of her heart. Her emotions were peaceful and I reveled in them as I thanked God for this amazing blessing he had brought into my damned existence. If I hadn't believed there was a God, finding my mate in this amazing woman most definitely would have been what changed my mind. She was absolutely perfect as a human and I could only imagine how much better she would be as one of us.

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 **A/N: I had intended to have this chapter up yesterday but my boyfriend confiscated my laptop for his fantasy football stuff. I haven't written anything lemony in a VERY long time so I'm nervous. I hope you all enjoyed it. Leave me a review and let me know what you thought :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you for the reviews, favorites, and alerts! I'm humbled by how many of you are enjoying this! I would have had this out sooner but I myself recently had a death in the family and it's difficult to write about a funeral when you've just been to one. Not to worry, we'll be ending this one on a citrusy note ;) Enjoy!**

 **And just since I haven't said it in awhile... I don't own it!**

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BPOV

I stood there in the black designer dress Alice had put me in that morning and stared at the offensive brick building with white shutters, and the words _Lane Funeral Home_ written in black fancy script above the front door. Esme stood on my right, holding my broken hand gently in hers. Jasper was on my left, also holding my hand but much more tightly than his mother figure.

He looked amazing dressed entirely in black; jacket, shirt, tie, slacks, and shoes. It contrasted nicely against his pale skin and blonde hair and made me think thoughts that were just not appropriate given the theme of the day.

When I saw him after he was dressed I flashed back to the night before and wished more than anything that we hadn't stopped. Yes it was early in our relationship for the physical part by human standards but there was nothing about us that was normal. He was a vampire and I was a human. The norms didn't really apply to us.

"Are you ready?" Carlisle asked from his place behind me. I felt like they were my bodyguards with the way they were all gathered around me and I couldn't say that I wouldn't be grateful for it when others started to arrive. _Normal_ humans naturally had an aversion to vampires, an instinct to stay away because they knew they were dangerous. Being surrounded by them would keep people from lingering too long and hopefully keep the Quileute wolves away altogether.

I had hated how Jacob acted toward me when I had gone to the reservation. The things he said hurt me and pissed me off at the same time. The fact that Billy agreed with him and never once came to my defense while his son belittled and berated me made it all the more heartbreaking. That man had been like a second father to me but because of his long ingrained prejudices against the Cullens and others of their kind it was like all of that didn't even matter to him.

Now that I knew Jasper wanted me changed I was grateful for the falling out. As much as I loved Jake and appreciated everything he had done for me after Edward had abandoned me I knew that a friendship with him wasn't something I would be able to continue with. Once I was a vampire we would be enemies and I don't think any amount of history between us would be able to override either of our instincts to kill each other. My change however was something that had to be kept from him until after the threat of Victoria and her army had been eliminated.

Carlisle's hand on my shoulder brought me back to the present and reminded me that I hadn't answered his question.

"No," I replied, "but let's get this over with."

The moment we opened the door my nostrils were assaulted by a very strong, overwhelming, floral scent. It made my stomach turn and for a moment I thought I was going to throw up the very small breakfast of toast and orange juice I had had at Esme's insistence before we left. I remembered that smell from my mother's funeral and I decided that just must be what all funeral homes smelled like.

To the right of us was an office and a staircase that led to the second floor where I knew more offices were located. To the left was an elevator and next to that was one of their two viewing rooms. Today this room was being used to display the memory boards and memorabilia we had put together in Charlie's honor. Directly across from where we stood were the bathrooms and a small table in between them that held coffee, water, and a few plates of cookies for the mourners coming to say goodbye to my father.

We were greeted by the funeral director. He took my hand and once again offered his condolences. He spoke very briefly to Esme about something but I didn't hear what he said or her response. My attention was focused on the door to the right. The room where Charlie's body laid waiting for us.

We stopped outside the door so everyone could sign the guest book or whatever it was called in this situation. We stepped inside and the sight in front of me made my eyes instantly fill with tears and a sob to escape. It wasn't the sight of Charlie laying there that did it. In fact I hadn't really looked at him yet. It was the flowers. There were literally flowers _everywhere_! They were piled on pillars on both sides of his casket. All four windowsills held as many arrangements as they were able to fit. When they ran out of room they had placed them on the floor along the outside edge of the room. I turned around and saw that there were even some in the other room.

Obviously it wasn't the flowers themselves that made me so emotional; it was that in that moment I realized just how loved my dad really was. There had to have been an arrangement from everyone in town.

At the sound of my sob, Jasper wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly to his chest. I couldn't even begin to imagine what everyone's emotions were going to do to him today and I was glad he took the opportunity to hunt while I slept the night before.

"Apparently being loved by everyone they meet is something that runs in the Swan family," he whispered to me. I smiled up at him through my tears and leaned up on my tip toes to kiss his cheek.

Slowly, we approached the casket. When I looked at Charlie I covered my mouth as another sob escaped. He looked… amazing. They had done an incredible job with him and I was overcome with gratitude that, somehow, they were able to hide the hideous bite mark I knew was under his collar.

His closed eyes no longer had the dark circles he usually carried from lack of sleep, worrying over a case. Every wrinkle he had acquired over the years was gone, leaving only smooth skin making him look twenty years younger. The cut on his forehead from the accident had been covered extremely well and was all but unnoticeable. I probably wouldn't have even seen it if I hadn't known it was there.

I stood there for what felt like days staring down into the face of the man who had loved me, raised me, and done everything he could to ensure I had a good life, and cried. I was ashamed of myself for not wanting to do this. I was ashamed for not wanting to be here to say goodbye one more time. I was a horrible daughter.

"Baby, no," Jasper said. "Don't you dare do that you yourself!"

I sobbed harder at his words.

Before I even realized my legs were giving out a chair was placed behind me and Jasper guided me into it before I could fall.

"What's wrong?" Emmett asked. "Don't do what?"

"She's ashamed of herself. She told me last night she didn't want to come today because she had already said goodbye and didn't want to put on a show for everyone. Bella, look at me."

When I didn't move my hands from my face he did it for me but I still didn't look at him.

"I'm a horrible daughter," I sobbed.

"Isabella, look at me," he said more forcefully. His use of my full name made me look without even meaning to.

"Stop it. I told you last night and I will tell you again, there is nothing wrong with you not wanting to come here and do this. You are not a horrible daughter. You took care of that man from the moment you stepped foot into that house. You made sure he was fed and had clean clothes. You kept the house clean. You never got into any kind of trouble and he never had to worry about what you were up to. You are an amazing daughter. You are an amazing _person_!"

"He would be so disappointed in me," I said once I got the sobbing under control.

It was Carlisle that knelt down in front of me this time. His soft eyes looked into mine; his four hundred years on this earth evident in their wisdom.

"Bella, the last thing Charlie would feel toward you is disappointment. I may have never fathered children in my human life but I know a thing or two about being a dad. I have been the father to four eternal teenagers for longer than you have been alive. I can tell you now beyond a shadow of a doubt that if it was me lying in that casket and they didn't want to be here I would _never_ be ashamed or disappointed in them for it. Do I believe you would have one day regretted that decision? I certainly do, but that doesn't mean it would have been wrong. Charlie loved you so much, Bella and he was so proud of the young woman you have become. His biggest regret was that he wasn't a bigger part of your life when you were young. You meant everything to him. From a father's point of view I think as daughters go, you're a pretty great one."

I wrapped by arms around him and cried into his shoulder. He held onto me, running his hand up and down my back in comfort. This really was the most amazing group of people I had ever known and I was truly the luckiest human on the planet that they had accepted me into their family.

Everything went smoothly after my little breakdown. When the Quileute wolves arrived the tension in the air was palpable but I was assured by Sam that everything would be fine. They weren't all present since they couldn't leave the reservation completely unprotected so Jared and a few of the younger ones were left behind. It was Sam and to my extreme surprise, Paul that were the most cordial with the Cullens. They even went as far as to shake hands with the men of the family. I found the gesture odd since there was no reason they had to do that but I was sure I'd get the opportunity to ask about it later.

Jacob hadn't spoken to me since he arrived and I had a feeling Sam might have had something to do with that since he seemed to be keeping Jake on a short leash. Pun intended. Billy was very formal with me and again it broke my heart. I wished that he would just accept my choices and stop being such a dick.

I got to hear some great stories as people shared their memories of Charlie. The former Chief of Police's recollection of a prank they pulled him when he was a rookie was particularly entertaining and caused an uproar of laughter from everyone there. It definitely lightened the mood for a minute and I think we all needed it. When the last person to speak took their seat Pastor Webber looked to me and smiled kindly.

"Bella, was there anything you wanted to share with everyone before we close?" he asked.

I hadn't prepared anything but I thought I should say something. I hated being the center of attention but I thought I owed it to my dad to at least try to speak on his behalf to his friends and coworkers. I at least needed to thank them all for coming. Jasper squeezed my hand and sent me some peaceful feelings as I stood and made my way to the podium that was situated just to the left of Charlie's casket. I had no idea what to say so I took a second to gather my thoughts.

"First I just wanted to thank everyone for coming today to pay your respects. I know that he would have been embarrassed by all of the attention but would have appreciated it nonetheless."

Those that knew him well chuckled quietly. I think Charlie may have hated attention even more than I did.

"From the time we are old enough to understand what death is, most of us were taught that you never speak ill of the dead. So when someone dies you hear people say 'he was a good man' or 'she was a good woman' regardless of how they actually lived their lives and treated others. I've heard a lot of people say that today and in the case of my dad, no truer words could be spoken. He dedicated his life to serving and protecting the people of this town. He probably would have taken a bullet for every one of us in this room today without a second thought. He wouldn't have done it because it was his job, he would have done it because that's just who he was. He was a good man and I'm going to miss him more than I can say."

I turned slightly to look at Charlie as tears once again filled my eyes.

"I love you, daddy," I half whispered half sobbed.

I left the podium and took my seat once again between Carlisle and Jasper. Jasper put his arm around me and pulled me into his side and Carlisle took my hand in his and held as tightly as he dared given it was the broken one as I let the tears flow. There was no point in trying to stop them anymore.

The graveside service was the hardest part. As I stood there watching by father's casket being lowered into the ground it hit me. This was it. It was really over; he was really gone. I held on to Jasper as tightly as I could as I cried again and said my final goodbye.

I decided that I should go to the house after all for two reasons. One, I was absolutely starving! And two, I decided to talk to Sam about helping with the Victoria situation and this seemed like as good a place as any to do it.

When I walked in the front door I was amazed at what I saw. Esme had really outdone herself. There was enough food there to feed the entire town and the rez twice. It was a good thing some of the guests were werewolves with substantial appetites or so much of what was there would have gone to waste.

Once I had eaten my fill I went in search of Sam. I found him in the back yard with the rest of the Quileutes that were in attendance.

"Hey, Bella," Emily, Sam's fiancée greeted me sadly as I approached them. She walked around Sam and hugged me, telling me how sorry she was.

"Thank you," I replied sweetly. "Sam, can I speak with you for a minute?"

"Of course," he said.

I didn't want to risk anyone overhearing our conversation so I led him around to the side of the house. No one would see us here and from where we stood, one of us would see if someone was coming.

"Sam, we need your help."

"We? Who is we? And what's going on?"

"Short version? Victoria has built herself an army of newborn vampires. The Cullens are outnumbered and we need the pack's help to take her out. Will you help?"

He stood there looking for all the world like a fish. His mouth opening and closing as he searched for the words to respond to my request.

"What are you asking?" he finally asked. "Why didn't Carlisle come to me?"

"Because it isn't a favor for them, Sam. It's for me. _I_ need you to help get rid of this threat to keep me safe; to keep everyone safe. She killed my dad, Sam. She killed Charlie. If Victoria brings her army to Forks everyone will be in danger. That's a lot of constantly thirsty, out of control, newborn vampires, They could wipe out three quarters of this town before anyone even noticed there was anything going on."

He stood there for a moment just looking at me. His eyes told me he wanted to say yes but his instincts were having a hard time agreeing to an alliance with his enemy. When he still hadn't given me an answer after some time I shook my head and looked down. I was disappointed that even though this put his tribe in danger, he still couldn't let go of his hatred long enough to defend them.

"It's ok, Sam. Thanks anyway."

I turned to walk away and ran right smack dab into Jacob. For someone so big you would think you would hear him coming. You would be wrong.

"Sam, why aren't you answering her?" Jake asked. "Why wouldn't you immediately say yes?"

To say I was shocked would be an understatement of epic proportion. If any of the wolves were to put up a fight about helping the Cullens with anything, it would have been Jacob. His hatred for them went beyond that of the prejudices of his tribe. His was personal and he seemed more than willing to help.

Jake registered my surprised expression and he rolled his eyes.

"I may hate _them_ Bella but I don't hate you. I would never risk your safety regardless of how angry you are with me, or how I feel about your _family."_ He spit out the word family like it left a bad taste in his mouth. "Besides, at least we'll get to kill _some_ vampires. Even if it isn't the ones that I'd prefer."

It was my turn to roll my eyes. I hated it when he said things like that and he knew it.

"If the safety of the tribe and the town is at risk then we will do what we can to help. We need to keep them as far away from the reservation as we can. The presence of so many of them will begin to trigger the gene in more of us if we allow them too close even for a short time. We've already had a couple of very young ones phase in the last few weeks and I'd prefer not to have anymore if it can be helped."

Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett approached us then, followed closely by Paul and Quil who was pushing Billy's chair. Billy was filled in on what was going on and even he seemed to agree that the wolves and the Cullens should join forces to eliminate Victoria. I had no idea if it was because he cared about my well being or if it was more that he felt a need for someone to carry out what he himself would have done if he were capable. This was the monster that killed his best friend and he wanted her dead as much as I did.

It was decided that we would all meet later that night to discuss everything in greater detail. Carlisle insisted that Charlie's wake was not the time or place for that discussion and everyone agreed.

When the last of Charlie's friends had gone and the house was empty I realized just how tired I was. It wasn't that I hadn't slept well. Emotional distress took a toll on a person and I wanted nothing more than to curl up in my comfy bed and, at the very least take a nap. I tried to help with the clean up but Esme shooed me away and told Jasper to take me home. I refused at first and insisted I help. She gave me that infamous 'mom' look, leaving no room for argument, and I did what I was told.

A shower was the first thing I wanted. I had taken one that morning so I didn't need it to get clean. It was done more as a symbol. I needed to wash the day away and I honestly felt so much better when I was done. I put on a pair of comfy sweats and one of Charlie's old Forks PD t-shirts.

Jasper was waiting for me when I exited the bathroom. He had changed into a pair of red lounge pants and a white t-shirt and was lying on his side facing the bathroom door. He looked beyond scrumptious and for a moment I forgot about the fact that we had just left my father's wake. I forgot that I was supposed to be sad. Instead I was almost instantly turned on and I had to struggle not to pounce on him. He really was too good looking for his own good.

I was a little embarrassed at where my train of thought had gone and it only grew when I realized he would have felt that spike of lust.

"Fell better?" he asked once I was in his arms.

I nodded. "It's amazing how much taking a shower can make you feel better after a day like today."

He hummed in agreement as he buried his nose in my hair and breathed deeply. I felt every muscle in his body relax as he repeated the action a few more times. It amazed me how just a few short months ago he had attacked me over something as small as a paper cut and now he was lying in bed with me breathing in lungful after lungful of my scent and he was fine. It just further solidified my theory that he had only done it because he had been feeling the bloodlust of the others and he couldn't control his actions because of it. I had to wonder now how many of his supposed slip ups had more to do with his power than his actual control.

"It must have been a stressful day for you as well," I continued. "I wouldn't imagine dealing with all of that emotion would have been easy for you."

"It's definitely not easy but it's bearable. I've been feeling everyone's emotions for so long that over the years I've learned to think around it. It's always there and I always feel it but when I try to block it out it becomes this small nagging thing in the back of my mind instead of something right there in my face that I'm focusing on."

"Thank you for being there for me today, Jasper. I don't know how I would have made it through the day without you there; without all of you there."

He leaned down and captured my lips in a kiss that ended far too soon for my liking. "There's no need to thank me, darlin'. I am exactly where I was always meant to be."

Before I could say anything he was kissing me again. I moaned at the taste of him as he slid his tongue against mine inside my mouth. I was certain that nothing that would ever pass my lips would taste as good as he did. He wound his fingers into my hair and tilted my head to the side to further deepen the kiss. I was quickly losing my ability to form coherent thoughts and I knew that the lack of oxygen had a big part to do with that. I needed to breathe but I didn't want to stop kissing him. I may die from suffocation but oh what a way to go!

He broke the kiss and I sucked in a deep breath. He continued giving me soft sensual kisses starting at the corner of my mouth and working his way up my jaw line to the spot just behind my ear. I moaned again when he ran his tongue lightly over the shell of my ear. I shivered but it had nothing to do with being cold.

"Baby, as much as I want to continue this, and trust me I do," he thrust his hips forward, pressing his hard cock into my hip to prove his point, "everyone is going to be home soon and you need to get some rest before we have to meet with the wolves tonight."

"I'm not tired," I said as I grabbed his hair and kissed him roughly. He didn't stop me. His lips moved with mine with just as much enthusiasm. He rolled over so I was on my back and he was hovering over me. He allowed just enough of his weight to rest on me so I could feel him but not enough to hurt me. I hitched my leg up and wrapped it around him allowing me to grind myself onto him. We both moaned at the contact and his kiss became even more frantic. One of his hands went under my shirt and he began to softly knead my breast. I loved how his icy touch felt in contrast to my overheated skin and couldn't help but wonder how it was going to feel when he was inside me.

I could feel my body begin to tremble with my impending orgasm. I didn't want things to end the way they had the previous night. I wanted to make him feel good too. As much as my mind was screaming in protest I stopped moving my hips and pulled away from him. He looked at me with concern but before he could ask I wrapped my arms around him and used my leg as leverage to push. He got the hint and rolled over onto his back.

I straddled his legs and reached for the drawstring of his pants. I was beyond nervous since I had no idea what the hell I was doing and I was afraid he would stop me just like Edward always did. Of course we had already gone so much further than Edward and I ever had but maybe this was where he would draw the line.

His hands shot out and grabbed mine, just as I had feared, stopping me from undoing the tie. I waited for his rejection. For him to tell me we couldn't do anything more because it was dangerous.

"Bella, why are you so nervous?" he asked.

Well that wasn't what I was expecting but at least he wasn't telling me I couldn't touch him.

"I've never done anything like this before, Jasper. I'm nervous because I want to make you feel good but I don't know what I'm doing."

"You'd be surprised how much of this is instinct, baby. Just do what feels natural."

He moved his hands and allowed me to untie his pants. I slid my fingers under the waistband and pulled. He lifted his hips to help me and when his cock sprang free from its confines I swear I almost fainted.

 _Oh no fucking way, Swan!_ My vagina screamed at me. _Hot as a campfire in hell or not, he is NOT putting that anywhere near me! EVER!_

He was, in a word, huge! I didn't really have much basis for comparison, not up close and personal anyway. I had stumbled onto a porn site once and I had been terrified by the size of some of the men I had seen. None of them even came close to what was currently staring me in the face.

I reached out and lightly ran my finger up his shaft and around the head. The skin was so soft and I was slightly mesmerized by it. Jasper sighed as I touched him and I hoped it was a sigh that meant he was enjoying it rather than one of impatience.

Once I had finished my exploration I wrapped my hand around him, as much as I could anyway, and gave one long, slow stroke. He moaned and bucked his hips a little, urging me on. I continued my movements speeding up a little and squeezing lightly when my hand came to the head. I noticed a drop of liquid escape the tip and without even thinking about what I was doing I leaned down and licked it up. He gasped as my tongue made contact and moaned long and loud when he realized what I had just done. He tasted amazing; just like he smelled.

I took his moan to mean that I should continue and wrapped my lips around the head of his cock, sucking lightly. I remembered listening to girls in school talk about doing this so I relied on what they had said to get me through this. I ran my tongue along the underside of his shaft, placing pressure against the vein that ran there.

"Fuck, Bella that's amazing. Don't stop, baby!"

His words and the noises he was making did wonders for my confidence. He wrapped my hair in his hands and pulled lightly causing the wetness to pool between my legs.

He used his hands in my hair to guide me, setting a pace he liked. He never pushed for more than I was willing to take and I found myself thoroughly enjoying what I was doing to him even though my jaw was beginning to tire and it was becoming painful.

"Bella, fuck, you have to stop. I'm gonna…"

But I didn't stop. I knew what he was trying to say but I didn't want to stop. He could have stopped me if he really wanted to. His hips bucked and he called my name as he came hard in my mouth. I swallowed as much as I could but there was so much and I knew some of it had to have escaped.

I released him from my mouth and couldn't help but smile at the totally blissed out look on his face. I crawled up beside him and rested my head on his chest. It took a minute for his breathing to return to normal and when it did he pulled me up and kissed me long and hard.

"Jesus, Bella! That was incredible. Are you sure you've never done that before?"

I rolled my eyes. "Just a natural I guess."

"How about I return the favor," he said wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. He rolled me onto my back again and just as his hand made it to the waistband of my sweats a loud knock sounded on the bedroom door.

"Put your clothes on, Major! I'm coming in!"

* * *

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	15. Chapter 15

JPOV

 _This motherfucker!_

The sound of Peter's voice forced a feral growl to emanate from my chest. It's not like he didn't know what the fuck was going on in here.

"Someone better be dead," I said for only him to hear.

He was amused and I quickly ran through all of the different ways I could cause him pain!

I pulled my pants back up just in time as the door flew open revealing my extremely unwelcome brother. I glared at him as he walked into the room and sat down on the bed like he hadn't just interrupted us. I wanted to tear his face off.

"Something you need Peter?" I asked as I pulled Bella back into my arms.

"I figured you'd want report from today's patrolling," he said with a shrug. He continued at a frequency and speed Bella couldn't hear. "Everyone is back and with the way things were going... well I didn't think Bella wanted to experience losing her virginity in front of a crowd so to speak."

He had a point and I was grateful that he had the forethought to stop that from happening. I had been so wrapped up in what was going on that I hadn't even given that any thought. Her mortification would have been epic if that had happened and I knew Emmett would have teased her mercilessly about it.

"Did you find anything?" I asked.

"She's definitely around, or has been anyway. We caught a few scent trails but the strongest one was about a day old. Char followed it as far as she could but it stopped about thirty miles north of here. She must have had someone waiting in a car. Her pattern was erratic, like she was trying to confuse whoever may have been following her. If it had been anyone else she would have succeeded. She's smart, Major and this isn't going to be easy."

I sighed and rubbed my hands roughly over my face. This would be so much easier if we knew where she was keeping her army. There had been nothing to indicate that a mass of newborns were attacking anywhere. We had been keeping an eye on every news channel from Canada to Nevada to North and South Dakota. If there were that many newborns loose near a human population there would have been _something_ that would have alerted us to their presence. Smart she most certainly was and it was more of a hindrance than I wanted to admit.

"How close did she get?" Bella asked. I could feel her fear and I sent her some calming vibes to keep her from getting too worked up.

"Close enough," Peter stated without giving too much away. "Don't worry, Bells we won't let her get to you. Between all of us and your smelly friends you'll be safe from her. I promise."

Her emotions told me that she believed what Peter said but there was still an undercurrent of worry and fear. I held her a little tighter to my side and kissed her forehead. I hated that she was scared and I couldn't wait until all of this was over.

I didn't need to be an empath to know that Peter had more to say. Vampires didn't fidget and he was sitting there picking at nonexistent lint on the comforter and his leg was bouncing slightly.

"Peter?"

He looked up and briefly made eye contact with me before looking to Bella and giving her an apologetic look. "Edward will be home in two days," he said.

Bella's anxiety escalated so quickly and hit me so hard that had I been standing it probably would have knocked me on my ass. I rubbed small circles on the skin of her back with my thumb in an attempt to calm her. This was inevitable and we knew that but I thought we would have a little more time.

"When it rains it pours," Bella said, mostly to herself. She sighed deeply and buried her face in my chest.

"I'll leave you two to talk," Peter said before quickly exiting the room and closing the door behind him. Everyone in the house would hear every word we spoke but a closed door at least gave the illusion of privacy.

"Well, I suppose it's better to get everything over with at one time," Bella said giving me the world's fakest smile.

"You don't have to pretend with me, Bella. I can feel what you're feeling and that smile isn't fooling anyone."

She didn't say anything more. She seemed to be lost in her thoughts and I allowed her the time she needed to come to grips with what was coming. Honestly I needed a few minutes to gather my thoughts as well. I had a lot of animosity toward Edward and I was concerned about what my reaction would be to seeing him. What I did know is that it wasn't going to be a pleasant reunion.

We were still sitting in silence when I sensed Carlisle coming up the stairs. For Bella's benefit he knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in," she said distractedly.

He opened the door and stepped into the room. "I just wanted to let the two of you know that we will be leaving shortly to meet with the wolves. Bella, Esme has prepared a small meal for you since you have not eaten in some time."

She nodded and I relinquished my hold on her so she could stand up.

"Is she okay?" Carlisle asked once she was out of the room.

"I think so. She's anxious about Edward coming home. I think at this point we all are for various reasons. This isn't going to be a happy reunion Carlisle."

"I know, son. He will be less than thrilled about recent events and it causes me a great deal of concern when I think about how he will react when he becomes aware of what has happened between you and Bella."

"You know that if he tries to hurt her I'll kill him." I wasn't asking. As a mated vampire Carlisle was aware of the lengths I was willing to go to in order to keep my mate from harm. Brother or no, I would have no issue with tearing Edward apart if he hurt her.

"I don't think it will come to that, Jasper. He has done some questionable things to showcase it, but he does love her. He would never intentionally cause her physical harm."

Half an hour later found us all in the clearing we used to for our baseball games. We hadn't been back here since the day we had met Laurent, James, and Victoria and I could tell that being here was making Bella a little antsy. Her weak human eyes would never be able to detect an approaching vampire but her eyes scanned the tree line every now and then anyway, looking for potential threats. It made me smile when she would do it. It was such a "soldier" thing to do and the more time I spent around her the more I realized just how perfect for me she actually was.

When the pack arrived they we immediately ran into a problem. Without Edward we had no way of communicating with them in wolf form and none of them trusted us enough to phase. It took a good bit of time for Carlisle to convince them that we meant them no harm. Even then it was only Sam that ducked into the woods and returned in his human form.

Once everyone was settled Carlisle stood in the center of the clearing and spoke to the wolves.

"As you have been made aware, there has been a threat on Bella's life from one of our kind. We have received intelligence that she has created an army to aid her in accomplishing her need for vengeance. My son Jasper and his brother and sister have much experience in dealing with these types of vampires. While I believe that all of you have the ability to help us eliminate this threat I think it would be wise for them to give all of us some pointers on how to fight them."

Every wolf snorted at Carlisle's last sentence and their annoyance weighed heavily in the air.

"We know how to kill vampires," Sam said. "It's what we were made for."

"Newborns are different," I said. I felt myself slipping into the role I knew so well as I stepped into the center of the clearing taking Carlisle's place. "In the first year of this new life vampires possess unparalleled strength. They are volatile and run purely on instinct. The sole thought to a newborn vampire is to hunt and feed."

Several menacing growls echoed through the air at the mention of these vampires feeding.

"An untrained newborn will always rely on brute strength in a fight. Because of this their attacks should be easy enough to counter. There are three things you must remember when fighting these vampires. Never go for the obvious attack. They will be expecting that and you'll be put on our ass before you can blink. Do _NOT_ allow them to get their arms around you. That will almost always end badly. And most importantly, never turn your back on the enemy."

We spent the next couple of hours sparring in small groups around the clearing. I had been keeping a close eye on Bella and she seemed completely engrossed in everything that was going on. She was taking it all in and I could tell that she was cataloguing everything I had said and everything she was seeing for future reference. I hoped that she would never need these skills but I was more than proud of her for having the foresight to pay attention. She was a danger magnet and even though she would be a vampire someday soon I had a feeling that would always be a part of her.

When I noticed she was starting to doze off I decided to end the session and call it a night. My mate was cold and ready for bed and her needs would always take priority over anything else.

Bella stood as I approached her and she smiled. "Hey, Major."

The thrill that shot through me when she called me major was borderline inappropriate and my pants started to become uncomfortable as my cock swelled. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her long and deep, relishing in the way her body melted into mine. When I pulled away her eyes stayed closed and she smiled again.

"Mental note: he likes it when I call him Major."

I chuckled at her and kissed her lips again lightly. "Come on, baby. Let's get you home where it's warm."

It was almost three in the morning when we made it back to the house. As much as I wanted to take advantage of the empty house I knew Bella needed sleep. I placed her in the bed and wrapped a blanket around her before climbing in next to her. We lay quietly, exchanging chaste kisses every now and again while we waited for sleep to take her.

The next night was spent the same way. Some of the wolves stayed behind for safety purposes. We worked out a training schedule, alternating groups every other night so that all of the wolves got the practice they needed without leaving the reservation vulnerable. Alice was still unable to give us a clear timeline on when the fight would take place. We weren't sure if it was solely due to the wolves' involvement or if it had to do with Victoria intentionally working around Alice's gift. Peter simply knew it would take place sometime within the next two weeks. He assured me that the closer the time came the stronger his _feeling_ would get.

Bella was becoming more and more anxious with each passing hour and it was making me jittery. She was dreading Edward's return and I was right there with her. I felt like we were strapped into a guillotine that was on a timer and we didn't know exactly when that rope would break and the blade would fall. It was with this thought I decided I needed some alone time with my mate and I cut my involvement in that night's training short.

"Why are we leaving?" Bella asked as I slung her onto my back to prepare for the run home.

"Because I want to spend some time with you," I replied as I kissed her hand and took off into the forest.

The others were aware of my intentions for the evening. I needed this time alone with my Bella before Edward came home so they were planning an overnight hunting trip so we could have the house to ourselves for the night.

"What would you like to do?" I asked her once we were inside. "How about a movie? Are you hungry?"

"I'm not hungry, Jasper and I don't want to watch a movie."

"Oh? Well what would you like to do then?" I asked again.

She stepped closer to me. So close that her breasts brushed against me when she inhaled a ragged and almost nervous breath. She reached up and wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling herself closer and she gently pressed her lips to mine. She hesitantly ran her tongue over my bottom lip. I was all too happy to give her what she wanted. As our tongues danced together sensually I lifted her off of the ground. She wrapped her legs around my waist and we both moaned as our bodies made contact. I slowly made my way up the stairs and into her bedroom.

I kicked the door closed with my foot and laid her down on the bed. I didn't have any expectations of her but I wanted to take my time with her and let things unfold naturally. I kissed the corner of her mouth, then her cheek, then her chin before running my lips down the column of her throat.

I slid my hand just under her shirt and ran my fingers lightly over the skin of her stomach. I loved the way her soft skin felt and I would have been completely content just touching her all night. I slid my hand higher, taking her shirt with me, as I placed open mouthed kisses on her neck. She pushed against me, an indication she wanted me to sit up. I did as she asked and was shocked when she grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head. She then reached behind her and undid the hooks on her bra. She held the front while she slowly slid the straps down and off of her shoulders one at a time.

She bit her bottom lip and looked up at me through her lashes. She really had no idea how sexy her innocence was. She was nervous and while I wouldn't manipulate her emotions at a time like this I would do what I could to erase her insecurities. I reached my hand out and ran the tips of my fingers over the skin of her chest and the swell of her breasts.

"Beautiful," I whispered.

I leaned down and captured her lips in a searing kiss, lacing my fingers in her hair as I did so. She did the same; her bra all but forgotten. I laid her back down and kissed her breathless, conveying with my lips just how much I wanted her. I kissed down her throat again but I didn't stop there this time. I continued down and across her chest. I paused briefly when I made it the swell of her right breast. I looked up at her and she nodded to let me know it was ok.

I kissed my way down and gently took her nipple between my lips. I ran the tip of my tongue over it then blew my cool breath on the damp skin. She moaned loudly and I smiled at her reaction. I switched sides and gave her left breast the same attention as I slid my hand down her stomach and between her legs. Her hips bucked as I made contact with her clothed pussy. I rubbed her through her jeans a few times before popping the button and sliding the zipper down. There was nowhere near enough room for my hand in those tight jeans so they would have to go. I stood up and grabbed the waist band of her pants and tugged. She lifted her hips to help and I slid them off.

I stood there for a moment just admiring the view. My beautiful mate lay before me in nothing but a pair of white lace panties. Her lips were bright pink and slightly swollen from our kissing. Her skin was flushed and it almost glowed in the dim light that filtered into the room from the full moon outside. She was beyond beautiful in this moment and I knew that I was one lucky son of a bitch.

The pink tinge to her skin deepened the longer I looked and she tried to cover herself. I quickly put a stop to that shit by grabbing her hands and placing them above her head.

"Never hide from me, baby. I love you and you're beautiful."

I back away again and she left her hands where I had put them.

 _That's my girl!_

I knelt down at the foot of the bed and lifted her foot to my lips, placing a gentle kiss to the top just above her big. She leaned up on her elbows and watched as I trailed kisses up to her knee then ran my tongue over her inner thigh.

Her moans and sighs excited me further as I gave the same attention to the other leg. I didn't stop my ascent this time. I ran my nose over the thin barrier between me and her soft skin and breathe din deeply. The scent of her arousal made my cock twitch and a small growl to escape my chest. She moaned louder at the sound and her scent grew stronger.

I slipped one finger inside her panties and rubbed her slick flesh.

"Jasper," she sighed.

She was absolutely soaked and I my mouth watered at the thought of tasting her.

"Mmmm, so wet for me, baby. Do you like it when I touch you like this?" I asked as I found her clit and rubbed it gently.

"Yes!" she moaned.

I slid her panties down her legs and threw them behind me. Her pussy glistened and I could literally see her arousal dripping out of her. I leaned forward and ran my tongue from her opening to her clit and flicked it before wrapping my lips around it and sucking it into my mouth.

"Oh my God!"

I grinned and continued to suck on her clit as she moaned and writhed above me. I coated my index finger in her wetness and slowly slid it inside her. She was insanely tight and I knew I wouldn't last long once I was inside her.

"Fuck! Oh, Jasper!" she yelled.

She sat herself up on her elbows again and looked down at me. I watched her watching me as I licked her pussy and slowly fucked her with my finger. Keeping eye contact with her, I withdrew my finger and replaced it with my tongue. Her eyes snapped shut and her head felt back and more delicious sounds escaped her lips.

I slid my finger back inside and then slowly added a second one. I pumped my fingers in and out, curling them slightly to hit her g spot while I worked her clit with my tongue. Much sooner than I would have liked I felt her muscles start to contract indicating her impending orgasm.

"That's it, baby. Cum for me."

"Oh, God! Jasper, I… Oh!..."

Her pussy clamped down on my fingers and she came hard. I lapped up everything she gave me and slowed my fingers as she rode out her orgasm and I moaned at the taste of her.

I lay down on the bed and held her as she attempted to control her breathing.

"Jasper, that was just… I have no words."

I chuckled and kissed her lips. "I'd have to say I agree, baby. You taste amazing!"

She blushed and I ran my fingertips over her cheek then down her body as far as her blush reached.

"Why do you have so many clothes on and I'm completely naked?" she asked.

"That doesn't seem fair at all does it?" I replied playfully. "Would you like me to remove them?"

"Well in the spirit of fairness…" she trailed off.

I stood from the bed again and removed all of my clothes. I did it slowly so she could enjoy the view as I had when I finally had her completely naked.

"Jesus Christ!" she breathed.

"You're doing wonders for my ego, darlin'."

I lay down on top of her and kissed her, swirling my tongue around hers. She moaned and I grew impossibly harder when I realized she was tasting herself on my tongue. I felt her apprehension when my cock brushed against her and I pulled back.

"We don't have to do anything," I said though I would be lying if I said I wouldn't be disappointed.

She didn't say anything. Instead she pulled me back to her and resumed our kiss while she raised her hips and brushed her pussy against me. I reached down between us and rubbed her clit, testing to make sure she was wet enough. The more turned-on she was the easier this would be for her.

She was still dripping.

I rubbed the head of my cock up and down her slit, coating the tip in her juices. I lined myself up with her entrance and used my free hand to run her cheek to get her attention.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

She nodded and turned her head to kiss my hand. "I love you."

"I love you too, baby."

I slowly slid the head in and I damn near came right then and there.

 _Do it and die!_ My subconscious screamed.

I slid in slowly and monitored her emotions to make sure she wasn't in too much pain. I had never had sex with a virgin before and I didn't know how bad the experience was going to be for her. I didn't feel anything to alarming so I kept going until I was all the way in. I stayed still, giving her time to adjust.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded. "I'm good, baby. You can move."

I pulled halfway out before sliding in all the way again. I did this a few more times keeping the pace slow. When she started moving her hips to meet mine I took that as a signal to speed up my movements.

Our moans and labored breathing was all that was heard and I slid in and out of her, thinking about everything I could to stop from coming too soon. She was so tight and wet and I wasn't going to last too much longer. I knew orgasms weren't a common occurrence for virgins their first time but I was not an ordinary man and I wanted my girl to cum while I was inside her. My movements sped up as I felt my orgasm approaching and right before it hit I hit her with my patented, orgasm inducing cocktail of emotions. I felt her muscles clamp down on my cock and she screamed my name as she came. Her pleasure hit me like a freight train and I buried myself as deep inside her as I could go and came hard, shouting her name.

It was the longest and most satisfying orgasm I had ever experienced.

I rolled over onto my back and pulled her with me.

"Fuck, Bella. That was incredible!"

She hummed in agreement.

She hadn't bled but I knew she would be sore in the morning. I wasn't sure if it would help but I decided to draw her a bath so she could soak in the warm water for awhile. When the tub was full I carried her into the bathroom and placed her in the water. She hissed as the water hit her and there was a spike of pain but it waned quickly so I wasn't concerned. She insisted I join her so I climbed in behind her and just held her as we both relaxed and reflected on what had just happened.

When the water cooled I dried her off and took her back to bed. Neither one of us bothered to dress as we were enjoying the skin on skin contact far too much.

"You might have some bruises tomorrow," I said as I ran my hands over a few red marks on her skin.

"They'll heal," she shrugged. "It's a small price to pay for what I just experienced, Jasper."

I smiled at her and kissed her. The kiss quickly became anything but innocent. She hitched her leg over my waist and slid herself on top of me.

We made love again though the second time was a bit more rough than the first. The first time had been about us. It was a way to show one another with our bodies how much we loved each other. The second time was my vampiric need to claim and mark my mate as mine. My scent needed to be on her inside and out. From the second I realized what she was to me I had felt the need to claim her. Had she been a vampire already I would have taken her away and done it then. She would have understood because her instincts would have been telling her to do the same.

Peter informing us of Edward's return increased that instinct ten fold. I knew I had nothing to worry about on Bella's end. She was my mate, my perfect match, and I knew she would never leave me. Edward was what I was worried about and he needed to know who she belonged to. He needed to know before words were even spoken that she had chosen me.

* * *

 **Well, lovelies what did we think? I was up until 3AM working on this so that I could get it out to you this morning. I reread this twice but if you find any mistakes please feel free to PM me and I will fix them. Thank you for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! You guys have made writing this so much more fun for me :)**


	16. Chapter 16

BPOV

I was in heaven. My body hummed and I had never felt more content in my life. This man had awakened things in me I never thought possible and I loved him all the more for it.

As we laid wrapped in each other's arms I couldn't help but think about the events that led up to where we were now. I almost felt the need to thank Edward upon his return for breaking my heart the way he did. Had he not overreacted to the events that occurred on my birthday I wouldn't be where I was now. That would have been a tragedy in and of itself. I was blissfully happy; far happier than I could ever remember being when Edward and I were together.

As I laid curled up with my forever, he shifted and his cock brushed against my hip. It was hard and as much I had enjoyed being so close to him in such an intimate way there was no way I'd be able to withstand a third round. The dull throb between my legs flared at the thought.

"Really, Jasper? Again?"

He chuckled quietly and brushed his lips against my forehead.

"Baby, I'm a vampire. I'm _always_ at least a little hard. The fact that we're still laying here naked and those perfect breasts of yours are on full display has a lot to do with my current situation though."

I blushed as I realized I wasn't covered and reached for the sheet. Jasper's hand shot out and grabbed mine stopping me.

"Covering that amazing body is damn near a crime. You don't want to be a criminal do you baby?"

"No I suppose not," I sighed, rolling my eyes. He smiled and leaned in, capturing my lips in a searing kiss.

One hour and another amazing orgasm courtesy of Jasper's extremely talented tongue found me curled up on the couch with him while we watched a movie. The others began to arrive back at the house when we were about halfway through.

"How'd it go?" Jasper asked Peter when he and Charlotte walked through the front door.

"I don't want to talk about it, Major," he growled, fleeing up the stairs and away from everyone. Char giggled before following behind him and Emmett was laughing so hard sound was barely escaping.

"What did we miss?" I asked.

Rose was giggling a bit as well but was able to answer. "Peter made the mistake of underestimating the wolves abilities. He was acting all tough like the seasoned soldier he is but he got taken down in about twelve seconds by the wolf he was sparring with."

While I found it slightly funny I didn't see why Emmett was laughing as hard as he was. Before I could voice this Jasper spoke up.

"Not that I don't find this humorous, but why is Emmett impersonating a hyena right now?"

Emmett's laughter just got louder and I couldn't help but giggle along with him. It was infectious.

"Because...(laughter)... It's because... (LOUD laughter)... Oh my God I can't. It's that good."

"Spit it out, Em," Jasper said with a slight roll of his eyes. He was trying to seem irritated with Emmett but the small smile on his lips proved he was anything but.

"What my husband finds so hilarious isn't so much _what_ happened to Peter but _who_ did it." Rose answered for Emmett giggling at her husband's antics.

Jasper and I said nothing waiting for her to continue. She opened her mouth to speak but Emmett had gained enough control over his laughter to blurt out the last name I had expected to hear.

"SETH!" He yelled. "It was Seth!"

Seth was by far the smallest of the pack and the youngest that was allowed off the reservation. There were two more that were younger than him, Colin and Brady, but Sam kept them at home and didn't allow them to be involved in patrols just yet. They were far too young at only twelve years old to be risking their lives just yet.

"You're shitting me!" Jasper exclaimed as his own humor at the situation finally took hold and he started laughing just as hard as Emmett.

I found it just as funny as they did but I did my best to control myself. I had no doubt that Peter's being bested by a fourteen year old had wounded his ego enough. I didn't want to laugh at him and make it worse. Apparently I was the only one that seemed to care.

Once the laughter had died down Peter and Charlotte came back down the stairs. I could almost feel Emmett's amusement as he sat quietly while Jasper was briefed on the training session he missed.

According to Peter the wolves would fair quite well against the newborns. Their individual abilities lacked discipline but when they worked as a unit the seven of them would be able to bring down even the strongest of vampires. I was comforted by this knowledge. I was worried for the wellbeing of my Quileute friends and I was glad that Peter thought they would all do just fine.

Once everyone else had arrived home they started talking battle strategy.I was beyond bored since there was nothing I could do to help so I escaped to the kitchen to make myself something to eat. The familiar task was enough to keep my hands occupied for awhile but my mind was all over the place. This is why I never heard the back door open. My mental preoccupation kept me from realizing there was someone else in the room until strong cold arms wrapped around me from behind. I knew immediately that those arms did not belong to Jasper and my heart flew into a frenzy from my fear.

"I always did like the way my touch affected you, love. I've missed you so much."

Edward's velvet voice washed over me and I relaxed but only a fraction. I was glad that it was him and not some other random vampire but I was still in the wrong arms. He leaned in, burying his face in my neck and breathed deeply. A deep growl, the likes of which I had never heard from him, rumbled through his chest. The fear came back tenfold and before I could register what was happening I had been ripped away from Edward's embrace and had three very angry male vampires standing between the two of us.

"You better get control of yourself little brother or you and I are going to have an even bigger problem than we already have," Jasper growled.

Edward crouched low and bared his teeth growling back at my mate. I half expected Jasper to mirror Edward's threatening position but he never moved. He stood between Peter and Emmett, the three of them a wall blocking his view of me.

"Who are you to talk to _me_ about control, Jasper? Remind me again which one of us lost it over a paper cut and almost killed my mate? And while you're at it, why don't you explain to me why she reeks of you?" Edward's voice held so much anger and if I wasn't mistaken maybe a hint of hurt as he questioned his brother.

I knew that Edward would be able to smell Jasper on me. I had a feeling that his return played a large part in the fact that Jasper and I had made love so soon into our relationship. That should have bothered me but if I was being honest I liked the idea of Jasper marking me with his scent, showing the world that I was his. Edward, however, didn't seem to like it at all. His eyes kept darting back and forth between Jasper and me and I swear I actually heard the click when what he was seeing and smelling fell into place and he understood what as going on.

I blinked and I was standing in the living room as I heard what sounded like two _very_ large boulders colliding.

"How could you do this to me?" Edward screamed.

More crashing followed by growling and snarling could be heard and I was getting pissed that Alice and Charlotte were blocking the way and wouldn't let me through.

"You guys are gonna piss Esme off if you destroy her kitchen," Emmett said. "Take it outside."

I knew when they were outside because Alice and Charlotte relaxed their stance in front of me. I pushed passed them and ran through the kitchen and out the back door. They appeared beside me but I had no intention of going any further than the porch. I may have very little survival instinct but there was enough there to keep me from getting in between two fighting vampires. I watched Edward attack Jasper again and again, only to be thwarted and put on his ass almost every time. Jasper wasn't even really fighting back. It seemed to me that he was simply giving Edward an outlet for his frustration and anger. I could see from where I stood that Jasper was quickly losing patience and the more times I watched as Edward attacked my mate the angrier I became. He was doing no damage but the _intent_ was enough to set me off.

"Are you done?" Jasper asked as he put Edward down yet again.

Edward stood up but didn't attack again.

"You took her!" Edward accused.

"Of course I did, Edward. She's mine and it's instinct to mark her any way I can to prove that to anyone that comes in contact with her."

"She wasn't yours to take! She's mine, Jasper! Her scent calls to _me_. Her mind is silent to my gift. You even agreed that her being my mate was the best explanation for that!"

"I was wrong," Jasper shrugged.

Edward pounced again and this time Jasper was caught off guard. As they crashed to the ground Edward began punching my mate again and again. The sound was deafening and I cringed as I covered my ears. When Edward grabbed Jasper's arm and I heard the God awful sounds as he attempted to remove the limb I had had enough.

"God damn it, Edward stop it!" I screamed as I ran down into the yard.

Jasper took advantage of the distraction and threw Edward off of himself, sending him flying into the woods. I knelt beside my mate and ran my hands over his arm at the shoulder joint. Edward hadn't managed to do much more than dislocate it but that was enough. My eyes watered at the idea of Jasper being hurt. It tore at my insides and I had a sudden urge to hurt Edward in any way I could. Physically I could do nothing, not that that had ever stopped me before, but I could hurt him in other ways.

"I'm fine, baby," Jasper said when he noticed my tears. He reached up and cupped my cheek, using his thumb to wipe away the tears that I hadn't even realized had fallen.

"He hurt you," I whispered as I ran my fingers as gently as possible over the damaged joint.

I leaned down and brushed my lips over the path my fingers had just taken. Jasper grasped by head with the hand that had been on my face and pulled me to him, kissing me sweetly, almost reverently. When I pulled away I leaned my forehead against his and sighed.

"All better," he whispered before placing a few more chaste kisses to my lips.

A low growl caught my attention and I spun on my heel, still hovering over my injured mate and my gaze locked with the man I used to want forever with. I narrowed my eyes and if I wasn't mistaken my own small growl could be heard by those that were close enough.

"Jesus Christ," Peter muttered from somewhere behind me. I didn't have time to worry about him or his comments. Right now I had a score to settle.

"Stop. Fucking. Growling at him!" I gritted out through my teeth.

I don't know if it was my tone or the anger I knew was evident in my eyes but Edward immediately fell silent. I stood up and made my way to him, stopping when my face was mere inches from his.

"How dare you?" I seethed. "How fucking dare you come back here after all this time and try to stake claim on me after what you did. Do you have _any_ idea what I have been through since September? Did you even bother to ask any questions before you started acting like a child who's favorite toy was take away? Of course not because everything is always all about Edward and what he wants and thinks and feels!"

My voice was eerily calm as I spoke.

"Love, I..."

"Shut. Your. Mouth. Do not call me that. You lost the right to that endearment when you left me alone in the woods that night. You got to talk that day and now it's my turn."

I was breathing heavily and the next words spilled out without thought.

"It's all your fault. Everything that has gone wrong in my life is because of you and your ridiculous need to be right all the fucking time. I pushed all of my friends away because _you_ hurt me so badly when you left and I was like a zombie. Charlie was at his wit's end with me and called my mom and Phil to come and get me and take me back to Florida with them. They never would have been on that road from the airport that night if it wasn't for what _you_ did and that drunk driver never would have hit them and killed them. Victoria is out there because _you_ wouldn't listen when Jasper told you she was a threat. Charlie is dead because _you_ walked away from me and left us unprotected.

"You broke me in a way you can never begin to understand and yet here you stand with the nerve to be angry because someone else came along and picked up the pieces. That's what you wanted right? For me to move on from you? Well I did!"

"With a human!" he interrupted. "I wanted you to have a normal, happy, _human_ life!"

"When will you learn, Edward? I'm not normal. I never have been. That should have been more than obvious when the first man I ever had any real feelings for ended up being a vampire. This is the life I am meant to live and I once thought it was supposed to be with you. I was wrong. Jasper is my forever. He wants me in ways you never did. He wants me to become one of you so we aren't limited in the time we have together. He isn't afraid to touch me or kiss me or make love to me. He knows deep down that even if he wanted to hurt me he could never do it because I am his mate and it's not possible. If you and I were meant to be then you would have felt that way too."

He was quiet for a second as my words registered in his vast vampire mind. He knew I was right but I also knew Edward and he was stubborn. He was trying to find an argument to make me see things his way. It didn't matter what he said now. I was tired of talking and I missed Jasper's arms. I turned around to go back to my love when Edward finally spoke.

"I lied to you that day. I have never stopped loving you. Not even for a second."

I turned and looked at him. He looked so sad and defeated but I didn't have it in me to care.

"I know," was all I said as I made my way back to Jasper.

"You know?" he asked.

"I don't keep things from her, Edward," Jasper said as he wrapped his arms around me tightly. "It may take me a minute to tell her things that I'd rather she not have to hear but I tell her nonetheless. She's my partner in life, my equal, and she has a right to know everything I do."

Edward said nothing and hung his head. Those words seemed to hit him harder than anything I had said and Jasper was right. The entire time Edward and I were together he hid things from me all the time and I had always hated it.

Jasper hugged me to him and kissed the top of my head.

"Baby why don't you go inside and get something to eat. Esme finished whatever it was you were cooking and I know you're famished."

He smirked at me and I couldn't help the blush that broke out all over my face and the heat that seemed to ignite in other parts of my body from his insinuation. I knew he had more to say to Edward and I would do as he asked to allow him the time he needed. I wanted everything out and over as quickly as possible since we had more pressing matters to deal with and we couldn't focus on that with the Edward issue hanging over our heads.

I nodded and reached up on my tip toes to kiss Jasper's lips then headed inside.

* * *

 **I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Two weeks wasn't terrible to wait for an update right? Working two jobs has put a serious dent in my writing time but as soon as this chapter is posted I will be starting chapter 17. Thank you or the reviews/alerts/and favorites! It makes me so happy to know so many of you are enjoying this. Leave me a review and let me know what you think will happen when Edward and Jasper have their little chat!**


	17. Chapter 17

As soon as Bella was safely inside and out of ear shot I rounded on Edward. He put his hand up before I could even open my mouth to stop me from speaking.

"Save your breath, Jasper. I have already heard what you want to say. There's no need to say it aloud."

He tapped the side of his head, indicating he had read my thoughts. All this accomplished was to piss me off further. I already wanted to rip his face off and feed it wild dogs. He was well aware of how we all felt about him poking around in our heads. Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

I shook my head and scoffed at him.

"Edward, you are my brother and I love you, but you are by far the most arrogant little fuck I know."

His body language and emotions told me he was going to lash out at me but I stopped him before he could start.

"Stop," I said. "Just stop. We're not going to keep fighting. You know how much it bugs Esme when any of us are fighting and I won't have Bella worked up all the time worrying about it because you know she'll blame herself. Let me say what I have to say and then this is done."

He studied me for a moment before nodding his head in agreement. He walked over to the tree line, taking a seat on a large boulder. He gestured with his hand for me to take a seat beside him. Standing above him made him look all the more like the child he truly was so I obliged him. I didn't look at him as I spoke. Being able to read emotions, I didn't have to.

"I understand why you're angry," I said,

"I'm not angry, Jasper I'm hurt! You're my brother and you stole the only reason I had to continue existing!"

"Ok, fine. I understand why you're HURT. What you need to understand is that while there may have been a chance she was actually your mate at one time, you leaving her changed that; you changed HER. She doesn't belong to you anymore Edward and with some time you'll come to see that. I don't expect your approval but I do ask you to respect that she is mine now. If you had intentions of coming back here and attempting to get her back then you need to forget that shit right now. Like I said you are my brother and I love you but I will not hesitate to tear you apart and bury the pieces in every corner of the world if you try to take her from me. Are we clear?"

I looked at him and saw him nod.

"After seeing the way she reacted earlier it doesn't leave much question as to who her mate really is," he said.

I smiled as I remembered her looking for all the world like a vampire as she crouched over me and growled at Edward for, in her eyes, hurting me. It was an odd reaction given her status as a human but it's not like there was a lot to go on in regards to human/vampire relationships. For all I knew it was completely normal but I would file it away as something to speak to Carlisle about later after everything had calmed down.

"I doubt he'll know much more than you do," Edward said, interrupting my thoughts. "She never had that kind of reaction with me though. Not to that extent anyway. I'm sure if she could have managed it I would currently be fusing my arms back onto my body."

I couldn't stop the laugh that escaped as I pictured her tearing his arms off. I saw Edward smile out of the corner of my eye as he shook his head.

"I'm going hunting," he continued. "I forgot just how strong her scent is and I need to make sure my thirst is as sated as possible if I'm going to be around her."

"Good idea," I agreed.

He took off into the forest without another word and I made my way inside.

I found my mate seated at the table with Carlisle and Esme. She and Esme were making a grocery list while Carlisle examined the fingers on her broken hand. It seemed like forever ago that I had busted in on the beginnings of Victoria's slow torture but in reality it had been barely over a week.

"Just a check up or is something wrong?" I asked gesturing toward her hand.

"Carlisle was concerned about the coloring of my fingers. I repeatedly told him I'm fine but you know how he is."

She rolled her eyes but smiled fondly at our patriarch. She loved the parental attention they lavished on her whether she wanted to admit it or not. It was something that she had sadly missed out on as a child and it made me happy to know that being a part of my family would allow her to experience what she had missed in spades. The youngest of us could have great grandchildren but that didn't stop Carlisle and Esme from doting on us like the teenagers we so often pretended to be.

I kissed the top of her head and breathed in her scent.

"Humor him, baby. He has to play doctor with someone and I don't mean in the fun way."

I waggled my eyebrows at her when she looked up at me and Carlisle and Esme both laughed quietly when her cheeks turned a deep pink.

"Jasper," Esme admonished. "Stop embarrassing her. Go find something to do until your father is done here. In fact, I believe you and my youngest son have a wall to fix."

I glanced over toward the wall in question and noticed that, while there was no hole, the plaster was cracked and there were small pieces and dust all over the floor.

"Shit, sorry Ma. I thought Emmett got us out of the house before we could do any damage."

"Well as much as I appreciate his effort he was unsuccessful. There are supplies in the basement."

She stood up and kissed my cheek before pushing me toward the basement door.

It took far longer than it should have for me to find the shit to fix Esme's wall. Emmett would have found it in a heartbeat since he was usually the one doing the fixing since he was usually the one doing the breaking. When I finally emerged from the basement Edward had returned and was seated at the table with Carlisle and Esme. Bella was gone.

"Where's Bella?" I asked.

"She went upstairs when I came in. Apparently she's angry enough at me that she can't even be in the same room with me," Edward answered.

"Give her time, Edward," Esme said as she placed her hand over his. "She has every reason to be angry with you right now but she'll come around. She has a penchant for forgiving even those that don't deserve it."

"Ha! That's the understatement of the fucking century," Carlisle mumbled under his breath.

"CARLISLE!" Esme, Edward, and I all yelled in unison. He rarely, if ever, swore and it just sounded weird coming out of his mouth.

"I'm just saying what we were all thinking," he defended.

I couldn't argue and the silence from Esme and Edward told me that they couldn't either.

Edward helped me fix the wall and between the two of us we managed to get it done fairly quickly. Once we had Esme's nod of approval I went in search of my mate.

It wasn't hard to find her since all I had to do was follow the sound of her laughter. She was with the girls in Alice's room and the carefree, happy feelings that were coming from all of them made me stop and turn around. I didn't want to impede on their girl time so I decided to go for a quick hunt instead. Emmett agreed to join me when I asked and Carlisle followed us out. To my extreme surprise, Peter joined us as well.

"The red eyes freak her out," he said by way of explanation. "I don't want her to be afraid of me."

"She isn't," I told him.

I couldn't help but smile at the fact that Peter was willing to change his diet, even for a short time, to make my mate more comfortable around him. He already loved her and I loved him all the more for that.

* * *

Over the next few weeks things seemed to both calm down and tense up at the same time. Bella had sat down with Edward and after an epic screaming match they worked things out to a point that Bella was at least civil towards him and didn't flee the room every time he walked in.

Charlotte had taken up the animal diet along with Peter and both of them now sported the golden eyes of a vegetarian. A look that was rather becoming on both of them if you asked me. This made the wolves a bit mote comfortable in their presence which helped them become more comfortable with our truce. Without the worry of them feeding on the locals it allowed the wolves to relax and we actually found ourselves enjoying our time together during out training sessions.

I spent as much time as I possibly could with my mate during the day but it was difficult with everyone around wanting the attention of one of us for one reason or another. It was because of this that I informed our family that, barring an extreme emergency, we were not to be disturbed at night. That was our time together and I refused to allow it to be interrupted.

We spent the time together in a number of ways. We would lie in bed and spend our time talking, learning everything there was to know about each other. On particularly stressful days she would ask me to read to her. I never questioned it and just did what she asked, though I didn't understand why it was only on those days. She finally admitted that it was because the sound of my voice kept her calm and helped relax her. We would watch movies or some TV show on Netflix and almost every night I had the extreme pleasure of making love to my mate or making her feel good in some way.

It was easy to forget sometimes that we had the threat of Victoria looming over our heads. We were still pretty much in the dark about when she and her newborns were going to pop up in Forks and honestly I was tired of waiting. It had been a little over two months since I returned and she still hadn't made a move.

"I can't wait anymore," I announced to the house.

I was sitting in the kitchen looking on as Carlisle and Edward attempted to help Bella with some science homework she had for her correspondence classes. She had decided she didn't want to go back to school but she still wanted to try to graduate on time. Given recent events the school was allowing her to do all of her work from home. She was only required to go into school for tests and of course finals when the time came.

All movement immediately came to a stop when I spoke and before I could blink everyone was standing in the kitchen staring at me, waiting for me to continue.

"This has gone on long enough. We've waited months for Victoria to make her move and nothing. It's time to take the fight to her."

"I agree with you, Major," Peter spoke up after a second. "The only problem is we don't know where she is."

"She has to be close," I said. "She's not going to be able to travel very far with a horde of hungry newborns. The devastation they would leave in their wake would surely draw the attention of the Volturi and that's not something anyone would want. Especially given how they feel about the practice of creating these armies in the first place."

The sound of a car approaching the house made everyone stop. With the exception of Bella every person in the room stopped talking, stopped moving, and even stopped breathing. We weren't expecting visitors and it didn't take long for us to realize that our visitors were not unsuspecting humans that had made a wrong turn into our driveway.

* * *

 **So as I read back through this story I realized that far too many of these chapters have apologies for lengthy absences. Sadly I have to say it again. I am, from the bottom of my heart, sorry for the extremely long wait. I promised a reviewer that I was not abandoning this story and now I'm making the same promise to the rest of you still reading. I will do my best to get the rest of this out in a more timely fashion. I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Leave me a review and let me know :)**


	18. Chapter 18

**Welcome back, my loves! I hope that all of you enjoyed the last update and you have come to forgive me for the extraordinarily long break I took from writing this. Enjoy chapter 18 and don't forget to leave me a review! :)**

 **I don't own it...**

* * *

I was beyond happy that Jasper had finally decided enough was enough and it was time to seriously start looking for Victoria to take the fight to her. I was tired of being afraid of walking into a room and finding her there waiting for me. Finding her was going to prove difficult but in all honestly we hadn't really been looking that hard. Yes, Carlisle and Edward were forever watching the news from all over looking for signs of a possible newborn army but it was obvious they were only half paying attention. The training sessions with the wolves had also become lax as of late and had turned into more of a good time than anything else. We had all become complacent and I feared that was exactly what she was waiting for.

In the middle of the conversation everyone just stopped. There was literally no movement from anyone for about ten seconds before Alice starting freaking out.

"Shit! How did I not see? What the fuck, Peter! How did you not know?" She was speaking so fast I almost didn't catch what she said.

"I don't even know how this shit works, Miss Cleo! Don't yell at me for not knowing shit that you didn't see either!"

"What is happening?" I asked.

"We have to get her out of here," Charlotte said in a panic, completely ignoring what I just asked.

"It won't matter," Rose said. "This house is saturated in her scent. They already know she's here."

Obviously a conversation had been had at vampire frequency and I was not being let in on what was going on. Someone was coming, that much was obvious, and whoever it was wasn't exactly welcome.

"Carlisle, call the wolves," Jasper said as he made his way to me and wrapped his arms around me as though he was shielding me from something. "Tell them to stay away from the area. They can't know about them."

"Jazz, if Aro is here," Alice began but Carlisle cut her off.

"He isn't. It's just Marcus and a few of the guard."

There was a flurry of activity for a moment and then everyone was still again. I was afraid to break the silence but I didn't want to be kept in the dark about what was going on anymore.

"Jasper," I whispered. "What's going on?"

"Shit, baby I'm sorry. We have unexpected guests. One of the three Volturi brothers and a few of their guard are here."

"You remember what I told you about the Volturi, right love?" Edward asked.

His term of endearment irritated me but I kept my mouth shut. He didn't even seem to realize he was still using it so I had long since stopped yelling at him for it and so had Jasper.

"I remember," I said as my body filled with dread.

There was one very, very important rule that vampires had to follow. They had to keep what they were a secret from humans. Any human that knew had to be turned or killed and I didn't want any part of either at that moment. Obviously becoming a vampire was an inevitability for me but I wanted it to happen on my terms. I didn't want to be changed because some millennia old vampire said I had to. I didn't see this visit ending well for me at all.

We all stood back while Carlisle and Esme went to the door to greet our guests. I hadn't realized it but my family had created a kind of cage around me with the way they were standing and even in the midst of this horrible turn of events I couldn't stop myself from smiling. It felt good to be that loved.

"Carlisle, it's good to see you, old friend." I assumed it was Marcus that spoke as the voice sounded happy yet bored at the same time. If I remembered correctly, Edward had said Marcus was the member of the Volturi family that had lost his mate many, many years ago and had since lost the any real will to be alive let alone enjoy life. He said that's what happens when a vampire loses a mate and the only reason the man wasn't dead was because his brothers would never allow him to take his own life.

"Marcus, it's wonderful to see you as well. Felix, nice to see you again. Please come in."

I still couldn't see anything but I watched as the cage of bodies around me shifted ever so slightly backward as the two new vampires entered the house. I knew when they entered the living room because everyone shifted again to the left. This must have been instinct because it didn't matter if they kept me from sight. Like Rose had said, my scent was all over the house and they would have known before they even pulled up that I was there.

"To what do we owe the pleasure of your visit?" Carlisle asked when I assumed they had all been seated.

"First I think I'd like to meet your family," Marcus said. "Last we heard from you there were five of you but it seems you have added a few more since then."

I saw Alice tense for a moment but then she relaxed and let out a quiet, shaky breath. I paid special attention to Edward and Jasper's body language since they would both be aware if anything was amiss. They seemed as relaxed as the situation would allow and since Marcus had entered the house Jasper's grip on me had loosened a bit. I hoped that meant Marcus did not have any ill intentions with his visit.

Everyone moved, almost as one, into the living room. Jasper took a seat as far away from Marcus and Felix as he could and pulled me down into his lap. Peter and Charlotte stayed close and chose seats on the floor near us. Everyone else found a place to sit or stand and Carlisle began the introductions.

When he got to us I held my breath. I was absolutely terrified of what Marcus would have to say to or about me.

"And this is my newest son, Jasper and his mate Bella. The two sitting with them are his brother Peter and his wife and mate Charlotte. They served together in the southern wars under the command of Maria."

"Ah, yes. I have heard a great many things about you and your abilities as a soldier, young Jasper. Your reputation precedes you but I am glad to see that you have chosen to live out the remainder of your existence in a peaceful fashion rather than stay in the south and fight with that horrible woman. I never did like her very much. That is no way for a lady to behave."

"Lady," Peter repeated the word and snorted out a quiet laugh. This earned him a kick from Jasper and a look from Charlotte I never wanted to be on the receiving end of. He mumbled an apology and stayed quiet.

The entire time Carlisle was speaking Marcus stared at me. It was starting to make me feel very uncomfortable and I couldn't help but to shift under his gaze. There was nothing menacing about the way he looked at me. He seemed curious.

"Miss Bella, I must say you intrigue me."

"And why is that?" I asked. My voice holding a bravado that I didn't really feel.

He smiled at me and I couldn't help but return it. He was so nice and there was something about him that was vaguely familiar to me. I knew I had never met him but being in his presence wasn't nearly as scary as I would had thought it was going to be. Of course that could just be him lulling me into a false sense of security only to drop the ax later when all of these formalities were over and he revealed the real reason he was here.

"You remind me of someone I knew several hundred lifetimes ago; my human wife Isobel. You have the same eyes."

I wasn't sure we were meant to hear the last part as he trailed off and seemed to get lost in his memories for a moment. He shook his head and his smile returned as he continued.

"As I'm sure your family had explained humans tend to keep a distance from us as part of some basic survival instinct. They know we are dangerous without knowing what we are. Yet here you sit in the lap of, quite possibly, the most dangerous vampire alive today, surrounded by a large number of others and you seem quite at ease."

"Is there a question in there somewhere?" I asked.

Jasper squeezed me arm lightly and used his emotions to convey a message for me to stop being rude. I wasn't trying to be I just didn't understand what he was getting at.

Marcus laughed. "Oh my, she is a feisty little human isn't she? No my dear, there is no question. I am simply making an observation. Although now that you bring it up I do have something to ask. Why is it that you are still human? Any instance I have ever heard of where a vampire finds his or her mate in a human they are almost always immediately changed."

"Bella has been through some rather traumatizing events as of late," Carlisle spoke up. "We would prefer to give her the time to heal from those things before she is changed. As you are aware we feel everything so much stronger than humans do and I would hate for her to carry any of that grief over into her vampire life and have to endure feeling it as we might. She will be made a vampire, Marcus, I assure you."

He nodded, seeming satisfied with the answer Carlisle had given. The air in the room seemed to get lighter with that small movement of Marcus's head and everyone seemed to perk up even if only by a small fraction.

"Well now that we have, what is the expression, addressed the elephant in the room? I am here because I had some business in the area regarding one of my descendants. While traveling I heard through others that there was some trouble brewing here and that your coven was the reason for it. Can you tell me what is going on, Carlisle?"

I laid my head on Jasper's shoulder and closed my eyes. I tried to think about anything and everything to distract me from what Carlisle was saying. He was going to have to tell Marcus about Victoria killing Charlie at some point and I didn't want to relive that. I knew when he got to that part if the story because Jasper's arms tightened around me and Charlotte reached out and placed her hand on my leg as a form of comfort. I was broken from my inner musings when Marcus stood from his seat and began shouting in Italian. I had no idea what he was saying but what I did know was that he was pissed.

He paced back and forth muttering to himself, his hands flying this way and that. I looked around the room and the shocked looks on everyone's faces told me that they either knew what was going on or they were just surprised at the showing of emotion. He stopped his pacing in front of Jasper and I and knelt down to he was eye level with me. He took my face delicately between his cold hands and kissed my forehead.

"Cara mia, I am so sorry for what has happened to you. One so young should never experience the loss that you have and I promise I will do whatever is in my power to help in avenging the death of our family."

"Wait, OUR family?" I asked in shock. What the hell was he babbling about?

"The business that I had was to pay my respects to what I thought was my last living descendant, your father, Charles Swan. I hadn't checked up on him in a very long time. I had no idea you existed. When any member of my human bloodline passes I make it a point to attend their funeral and assist the family in any way I can if it is needed. I did not hear about his passing until much too late to attend the funeral, as you can see, but I still wanted to make the trip. I never imagines that I would find another living member of my family but I am so happy that I have."

I stared at him in a stupor for far longer than was acceptable. Was he fucking with me? This had to be some kind of fucked up joke. There was no way that I was blood related to a member of the vampire royal family.

"Well this has become a much happier occasion hasn't it?" He said, his smile returning. "Felix, please bring the others inside while I make some calls. We have a vampire to find and I need to formally announce to my brothers that young Bella and her family are now under my personal protection."

He turned back to me and replaced his hands on my face.

"I will personally see to it that you will never experience loss at the hands of a vampire for as long as I walk this earth. You will always be protected. Even when you are less fragile and no longer really need it."

He kissed my forehead and disappeared in the direction of the kitchen leaving a room full of stunned vampires and one very happy human in his wake.


	19. Chapter 19

**Hello, Lovelies! This chapter would have been out much sooner but my computer crashed and I lost EVERYTHING! It's taken me some time to get back into writing after losing all that work but I'm trying. Thank you all so much for sticking with me and being so patient. To any reviewers that I didn't respond to from the previous chapter, I apologize and thank you so much for taking the time to review :) Enjoy chapter 19!**

 _Is this real fucking life? Seriously?_

I wrapped my arms tighter around my Bella as we watched Marcus exit the room to make his calls. For reasons I couldn't explain I just needed her close. I felt a little bit like now that my family wasn't all she had maybe she wouldn't want to stay with us. Maybe she would want to return to Italy with Marcus when he left. It was ridiculous, of course. She was my mate and could never leave me. Besides, I didn't think Aro and Caius would appreciate Marcus bringing a human girl home, regardless of her status as his family.

I reached out to Bella with my gift to get an idea of what was going on in her head as she sat motionless in my lap. I bypassed the emotions I always felt coming from her and focused on the new ones. Confusion and fear were prominent but the one that surprised me the most was the anger. What could she have been angry about? I wanted to ask her about it but I didn't think she would want to discuss it in front of everyone so I kept my mouth shut and filed it away for later.

She shifted in my lap so she was sitting sideways and laid her head on my shoulder, burying her face in my neck. She took a deep breath and sighed a contented sigh. Her tense body relaxed in my arms and the flurry of emotions she had been feeling calmed significantly.

"Better, baby?" I asked her.

"Mmhmm," she hummed as she nuzzled deeper into me and closed her eyes.

"When this is all over I'm going to take you away," I whispered to her. "Some place warm and secluded so we can be alone and lay out in the sun all day. How does that sound?"

"Like heaven," she replied, smiling against my skin.

She placed a soft kiss on my neck and the warmth of her lips almost made me shiver. I wished in that moment that everyone around us would just disappear. I wanted her all to myself. With a few exceptions we had been surrounded by our family since their return and it seemed it was only going to get more crowded in the Cullen household until Victoria was taken care of.

The idea of taking her away for the night to a hotel crossed my mind but I saw alice shake her head from the corner of my eye.

"It's too dangerous." She spoke quietly enough that Bella couldn't hear. "You guys need to stay close to home."

"I wasn't planning on whisking her away to Paris, Alice. I was thinking more like Port Angeles for one night."

She shook her head again and I let the subject drop. As much as I hated her meddling sometimes I trusted her and I would never go against her council.

"Alice," Carlisle said. "Has anything changed in regards to our native friends?"

Her expression went blank as she began scanning the future. We all knew what he was asking. Would the pack still be involved in taking down Victoria and her army now that Marcus was getting involved?

"No," she finally said after a few moments. "I'm not sure how that's going to work but I still can't see much so that means they have to be involved.

"There is no need for cryptic talk," Marcus said as he entered the room again. "I know about the wolves on the reservation. I'm not sure how they will feel abut me given that I do not share your dietary restrictions but I am willing to be peaceful with them if they are helping to protect our Bella."

I didn't like him referring to her as _ours_. My inner beast started rattling his cage at the thought and a deep, possessive growl rose from my chest without my permission.

 _MY BELLA_ the demon in me screamed inside my head. _MINE! MY MATE!_

It took all of my strength not to tear her clothes off and take her right here in front of everyone to remind them just who she belonged to. A small, warm hand touched my face and I looked down at my mate who had fallen asleep in my arms.

"Yours," she whispered.

Her breathing was deep and even. She wasn't awake. I must have been projecting and even in her unconscious state she could feel it enough to reassure me and bring me back to myself. I grabbed her soft hand and brought it to my lips, placing a kiss to her palm and then replacing it against my cheek.

 _Mine_ the beast said more calmly.

"You alright, Jazz?" Emmett asked from across the room.

When I looked up I saw that everyone had moved further away from my seat, giving us a wide berth. They were all as still as statues as they awaited my answer.

"I'm fine," I said. "I apologize for that, Marcus."

"It is I who should apologize. I did not realize how new the mating bond was between you. It is quite strong and resembles that of a mated pair that has been together for centuries. What you have is very rare and quite special."

I looked down at my sleeping mate. Her lips were parted slightly and her warm breath hit my skin and surrounded me in her scent with each exhale. Her skin was slightly flushed and I couldn't help but wonder what she was dreaming about. I hoped it was me.

"I agree that what I have is very special," I said without looking away.

"You have no idea," Peter said cryptically.

Everyone looked at him but he offered nothing more but that fucking grin he uses when he knows shit other people don't. I hated that damn grin.

"Now," Marcus said clapping his hands together. "Shall we discuss this nasty vampire situation?"

"Wait until Bella wakes up," Edward said. "She'll be upset if we make plans without her."

It shocked me that he was the one to speak up. He was the king of secrets when it came to Bella. I sent him my gratitude and thanked him with my thoughts.

I took Bella to her room and placed her in the bed gently so as not to wake her. She tossed and turned a little when I put her down but she eventually settled and stayed asleep. While we waited for her to wake up we discussed hunting boundaries with Marcus and the others. We insisted they give a wide berth to the area so as not to arouse suspicion and not to piss off the wolves. It had been nice having this truce with them and I hoped that it would hold out even after Victoria had been dealt with.

"I wouldn't mind trying it your way," Felix said. "If that's ok with you, Marcus."

"By all means, Felix, do as you please. I'm afraid my brother will insist you return to a human diet once back in Volterra. You know how he feels about Carlisle's strange way of feeding."

"I'll take you hunting if you want," Alice spoke up. She said it quietly, almost shyly. That was not normal for her and I wondered if maybe she had a little bit of a crush on him. I reached out with my gift and sure enough…

Felix was having some of the same feelings but they weren't very strong yet. I had a feeling that would change over the course of their visit and I wasn't sure how I felt about it. If it happened that Alice and Felix were mates I didn't know how that would end for the family. It would devastate all of us if Alice left and I doubted that Felix would be allowed to remain here.

I was jumping the gun with those thoughts. The feelings I was getting from them could have been fleeting and nothing would come of them. Of course there was always a chance that they weren't.

The sound of my mate beginning to stir pushed all thoughts of Alice and Felix from my mind and I flew up the stairs and into her room. She was barely awake. Her eyes were just opening as I slid into the bed beside her.

"Have a nice nap, baby?" I asked her as I leaned in and placed a few small kisses on her neck.

"The waking up part is, so far, much more pleasant," she replied with a small smirk.

I trailed my kisses up to her ear and across her cheek before capturing her lips with mine. I tried very hard to keep my kisses innocent but she was having none of that. She ran her tongue over my bottom lip and I opened my mouth to her. Our kisses remained slow as she had to pay careful attention to my sharp teeth, but there was plenty of passion.

The slow pace was becoming like some kind of fucked up torture so I chased her tongue back into her own mouth so we didn't have to be so careful. I grabbed her by her hips and rolled over pulling her on top of me. She immediately began rocking her hips, grinding herself against me. I let her continue for awhile since it felt fucking amazing but eventually I had to stop her.

"Bella, baby we have to stop."

"No we don't," She replied, covering my mouth with hers again.

I pulled back as best as I could with her being on top of me and stilled her hips.

"Everyone is still downstairs, Bella."

"I don't care," She said as she kissed long my jaw line. "I want you."

She reached down between us, unhooked my belt, and yanked it through the loops. She went to work on the button and zipper of my jeans and I was too shocked and far too turned on to stop her. She wasn't usually this brazen but I had to admit that I liked it. I was well aware that she wanted me but it did something for my ego that she was being so forward about it. I would do my best to let her stay in control. It wasn't in my nature to allow that but given what had happened earlier I was afraid my instinct to REALLY claim her would take hold and I'd hurt her, or kill her.

A small huff caught my attention and I realized that while I had been lost in thought she was attempting to take my pants off. She crawled back up so she could reach my lips and started kissing me again only this time it was frantic.

"Jasper, please. I need you, baby. I need you."

She was begging and that I did not like. Not like this anyway. Her voice sounded desperate and dare I say pained. She was feeling a lot of fear and a pretty extreme amount of possessiveness. Her eyes were shining with tears that I knew would fall any second. I had no idea what was going on in her head but I knew I needed to make it stop.

I grabber her face between my hands and shushed her.

"You don't have to beg, baby. I could never tell you no and mean it. I want you all the time, darlin'. I only suggested that we wait because everyone is here. Please don't cry."

Her tears were already falling so I kissed her long and hard and gave her what she needed.

Afterward we lay in the bed tangled up in each other. I had wrapped a blanket around her as best as I could to keep her from getting too cold. We hadn't spoken yet. I was waiting for her to tell me what that was all about but it didn't seem like she was going to come forth with the information on her own. She was feeling so many emotions and I was having a hard time keeping up. It was when I felt the embarrassment and guilt that I decided she was going to talk whether she liked it or not.

"Bella, would you like to tell me why you're feeling the way you're feeling right now?"

She shook her head and buried her face in my chest. I felt the heat from her blush on my skin and I chuckled.

"Baby, do you feel guilty for seducing me?"

As soon as I said it her guilt flew to new heights and she covered her head with the blanket.

This time I outright laughed. I felt bad for laughing at her but I couldn't help it. She had absolutely no reason to feel that way and I told her as much.

"It's not really that," she said. "I had a dream and when I woke up I was just, I don't know, I guess desperate for you. I needed to feel you. I needed to know you were here and that you were mine. I feel guilty because you said no and I pushed anyway and I'm embarrassed because of the way I acted."

"Bella, the only reason I tried to stop you is because I know how you feel about the family being able to hear what goes on in here and we have new people in the house right now. I already told you, I want you all the time and I could never deny you anything. Don't feel guilty or embarrassed for wanting me the same way. Now what did you dream about?"


	20. Chapter 20

I felt so stupid. It was just a fucking dream! I knew it was a dream but it all just felt so real. I couldn't help that the feelings I had carried over to my conscious self. I was a woman possessed and I had to have him.

"There were these women," I began. "They were vampires and they kept telling me I wasn't good enough for you. They were trying to take you from me and they were succeeding. Then Marcus came and said I had to go with him and you didn't try to stop him. When I woke up you were there and I just felt this weird urge to… I guess _claim_ you? I think that's the best way to describe it. I'm sorry, Jasper. I sound like a complete lunatic right now, I know but it scared me and I just couldn't think of any other way to make those feelings stop, and..."

He cut me off with a kiss. He poured so much love and understanding into me with that kiss that I could have, quite literally, melted. When he pulled away he was smiling like I had never seen him smile before.

"You look like the Cheshire Cat right now," I said giggling.

"I'm happy," was all he said.

"You're happy that you're possibly mated to a mental patient?"

"You're not a lunatic or a mental patient, my Bella." He sat up and pulled me into his lap, tucking the blanket around me to keep me warm. "That, what you felt in the dream and when you woke up, is completely normal. That's the mating bond. When we feel that bond threatened in anyway it's instinct for us to solidify it and sex is the most basic way to do that. It outs our scent all over each other so there's no mistaking who we belong to. There is absolutely nothing wrong with what you just did."

His explanation made me feel a little better. The part that I didn't understand is why I was feeling this way before becoming a vampire. I was a human being. Regardless of who I was in a relationship with I should not feel the need to _scent_ him to keep away potential threats. Especially when said threat was two random women in a dream. I felt like an animal.

"Come on," Jasper said. "Let's go take a shower and then we'll go talk to Carlisle. I know hearing that you're completely sane from him will mean much more than it does coming from me."

"First of all, that's not true. Second, I am NOT talking to Carlisle about how I pretty much just molested his son. Third, no shower. My lunacy is showing again by admitting this but I just need you to smell like me for a little while."

"Whatever you want, darlin'."

As I got dressed I considered Jasper's suggestion of talking to Carlisle. While I found it strange and a just a tiny bit unsettling that I was feeling the mating pull, bond, whatever it was called, so strongly I decided that it wasn't really a big deal. If I was being honest I knew that Carlisle wouldn't be able to offer much on the way of an explanation. My relationship with Jasper wasn't normal by human or vampire standards so really what could he tell me? We had more important things to concern ourselves with. Besides I would be changed soon and it wouldn't make a difference why I felt the way I did as a human.

"What are you thinking about so hard?" Jasper asked as he wrapped his arms around me from behind and placed a kiss to my jaw. I smiled and leaned back against him.

"Nothing important. Come on let's go join the others. I want to hear what the plan is for dealing with Victoria."

"We haven't discussed it yet," he said. "Edward suggested we wait until you were awake so that you could be involved."

"EDWARD suggested it?" I asked shocked. He was the last person I would have assumed would want me involved. He had always been so adamant about keeping me out of things like that. I was starting to realize just how controlling he had been over the course of our relationship and just how unhealthy it really was.

"He's trying, baby. I think he's finally staring to realize just how much he held you back and these little gestures are his way of attempting to make amends for that."

The phrase too little too late flashed through my mind but I had to give credit where credit was due. He WAS trying. He stuck up for me when Alice would insist on playing Bella Barbie when I wasn't really in the mood. He had also stopped trying so hard to assert himself into my daily life like he had when he had first returned. If he was hoping these things would change my feelings about him then I hoped he enjoyed disappointment. In a very short time Jasper had become my everything and I couldn't imagine even a small part of my future without him by my side.

When we entered the living room I immediately noticed that there were two new additions to our ever growing household; a male and a female. They looked in my direction when we entered and I simply smiled and nodded by way of greeting and took a seat on the sofa next to Esme.

"Ah good," Marcus said with a smile. "Now that the two of you are here we can begin making plans for this...Victoria is her name?"

"Yes," Carlisle answered.

"Would you mind telling us why this vampire has decided to come after your human?" the female asked.

"I'm afraid we may have provoked her." Carlisle answered.

He continued telling them of our meeting with the small coven in the clearing. Edward took over, explaining James' thoughts during the confrontation.

"It was a game to him," he said. "He saw how we all reacted when Bella was threatened and it intrigued him. He was positively delighted at the prospect of pursuing a target that was so protected. He was confident that regardless of how many of us there were he would be able to get to her and kill her. He was so focused on Bella and his game that Jasper and I both missed the connection he shared with Victoria. We had no idea that they were mates then.

"You killed a mated vampire?" the new male asked. "That is a grave offense."

"We are aware and understand that," Edward said. "However at the time it was thought that Bella was my mate and I did what I thought was necessary to protect her."

"Did you think to explain to this vampire that he was attempting to kill another's mate? Even if she was human surely he would not have broken one of our most sacred laws," the female stated.

"You clearly don't realize what kind of sick and twisted creature we were dealing with," Jasper spoke up. "Had there been a more peaceful option to resolve the situation we would have chosen it."

"I agree with young Jasper on this," Marcus said. "My friend Carlisle is a peaceful man and is against taking the life of another living being. If there had been another way I have no doubt he would have found it. Also, the Cullens are not on trial for their actions, Chelsea. Please stop acting as such."

Now I knew the annoying female's name. Her need to question the actions of my family was starting to grate on my nerves and I found myself wishing, not for the first time during the conversation, that she had kept her sparkly ass in Volterra.

"I apologize, Master. It wont happen again."

"See that it doesn't. Please, Carlisle, continue your story."

Everyone stayed quiet and kept their questions and comments to themselves as Carlisle continued to speak. That was until he got to the part abut the family leaving me. Marcus was furious and most of his ire was directed at Edward. He had been, after all, the one that made the final decision to leave me behind.

"Stupid child!" Marcus' voice boomed throughout the large room and I found myself shrinking into Jasper's side. "How could you just abandon the one you thought was your mate?"

"She wasn't safe being a part of our world. I did it so she would have a chance at a normal, happy, human life."

"You left her unprotected and put her in even more danger! Not safe in our world indeed! I'm sure that given your relationship status your scent was all over her house. That in itself would have drawn the attention of others passing through the area to her home and therefore her and her father. Not to mention you left a human with knowledge of our kind. How could you be so careless, Edward? How could you be so HEARTLESS? Were it not for the fact that she has mated with Jasper I would take Bella away from all of you."

I heard the words he spoke. I knew he wasn't taking me away and had no intention to do so but with my dream still fresh in my mind his words made me panic. My heart rate sped up to a dangerous pace and my breaths started coming in short and shallow. I felt Jasper's arms tighten around me as he lifted me into his lap and I felt his lips brush against my ear as he spoke quietly/

"Bell, darlin' relax. You're not going anywhere. Marcus isn't going to take you away from me, He would never do that to you. I need you to calm down."

His words were doing nothing for me. They went in one ear and out the other. He maneuvered me so my back was against his front.

"Just like before, baby. Match your breaths with mine. Breathe with me."

I did as he asked and tried to focus on his deliberate breaths. Each time he exhaled a new wave of his scent surrounded me and so I focused on that as well. I was safe and in the arms of my forever and just like that day in the dining room, it worked. My breaths slowed until they were nice and slow and deep. My heart was still beating a bit faster than I would have liked but it too had slowed.

"I apologize, cara mia," Marcus said once I had relaxed. "I did not mean to frighten you. I would never take you away from your mate and your family. Please forgive me."

I smiled at him. "There's nothing to forgive, Marcus. I apologize for my reaction. It's just that the thought of being without Jasper on top of a dream that I had… it was just too much."

Once everyone had recovered from Marcus' outburst and my moment of panic they began discussing the best way to deal with Victoria. The problem still remained that we had no idea where she was. No amount of planning would do anyone any good if we didn't have that most basic information.

"I'm already taking care of that," Marcus said when I brought it up. "We have a member of our guard that is a gifted tracker. He should be able to find her with ease and then we can take this fight to her. I am slightly concerned with our numbers, however. Alice, dear can you see how many we will be up against?"

"I have been trying to see something for awhile and I'm just getting small snippets here and there and it's nothing useful. It's like she's found a way around my gift and I'm blind."

"Does she know of your abilities?" Marcus asked.

"After our first meeting, one of her coven decided to seek out our friends in Alaska. He was intrigued by our lifestyle and wanted no part of what was happening here with Bella and his coven mates. If he managed to stick with them I would imagine they told him some information regarding our family which he could have passed along to Victoria," Carlisle answered.

Everyone was quiet for a moment as they contemplated this. The answer to why Alice couldn't see anything was beyond obvious to me so when the silence remained I decided to speak up.

"Someone else is making decisions for her," I said quietly.

Every head turned in my direction, some looking perplexed while some, namely Peter, looked almost proud that I was the one to have figured it out.

"What do you mean, sweetie?" Esme asked.

"Think about it. Alice's gift works based off of the decisions people make. The Denalis would know this and if Laurent became privy to that information then Victoria knows about it if he's kept in touch with her. Alice is watching Victoria's decisions like a hawk so it stands to reason that she's not seeing anything because Victoria herself isn't the one behind the wheel. Knowing what I know about newborns it's obviously not one of them so she must have enlisted an older, more controlled vampire to help her. Someone to make all the decisions regarding her attack."

"If it was Riley then that explains why she hasn't attacked yet," Peter said. "When we killed him she lost her puppet and would have to take the time to find a new one so that we stayed blind to what she's planning."

"Then we have an advantage," Marcus said. "If she had to create a new consort then she will need the time to allow him or her to gain some semblance of control over themselves to be able to hold a position of authority over the others. I can't imagine that many, if any, older vampires in this part of the world would have anything to do with an attempt to take out your family, Carlisle. Everyone that knows of you is aware of your peaceful nature."

Everyone stayed silent, absorbing everything when Alice was pulled into a vision. It seemed to last far longer than any other I had ever seen her have. Her face was a mixture of anger and pain as she came out of it and the low, guttural growl from Edward told me that whatever she had seen was not good; to him at least.

"Alice, what did you see?" Jasper asked. He was tense and I assumed it had a lot to do with the emotions coming from our resident psychic in regards to her vision.

"I don't want to say just yet," she answered. "Not until I have a solution."

That made me angry. My life and the lives of my family were in danger and she was obviously withholding vital information.

"Oh for fuck's sake, Alice stop!" I yelled, standing from my position in Jasper's lap. "I want to know what you saw and I want to know now! I get that sometimes the things you see can be scary and you don't always share your visions for obvious reasons but this time? This time we need to know what you know. Our lives are on the line here. MY life is on the line. I have always trusted your visions and never questioned your need to keep shit to yourself but not now. You may not have a solution but someone else might, so spill!"

I felt bad for speaking to her that way. She was my best friend and I loved her but I was also terrified and I wanted to know even if it was only one possible outcome of many. She was pulled into another vision causing an even stronger reaction in Edward this time.

"NO!" he bellowed. "Alice if that is the outcome just keep your mouth shut! That isn't an option."

"It's not your decision, Edward. Not anymore." She spoke this last part quietly and I wasn't sure if I was even supposed to hear it.

"Alice, please," he begged. There was venom shining in his eyes and I knew that if he could, he would be crying.

She shook her head and looked up at me.

"Maria," she said. Just the name caused a round of growls to sound behind me and my own noise of anger and disgust escaped me.

"That's who Victoria has gone to for help. I saw her speaking to Laurent. The Denalis told him everything and he relayed the information to her. She'll go look for her and Maria will agree to help her. She wants you back, Jasper. She's been biding her time, waiting for the right moment to strike and Victoria is giving her the perfect opportunity. This isn't going to end well for our family."

I stumbled backward and fell gracelessly back into Jasper's lap. Tears sprung to my eyes and no matter how hard I tried to beat them back it was no use. I was going to die and in the process some, if not all, of my family would die with me. Maria would take my mate and force him back into the life he worked so hard to escape and overcome. I was powerless to stop it. Or was I?

"Change me," I said, turning in Jasper's lap so I could see his face.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Edward roared.

I spun around glaring dagger at him.

"You shut the hell up," I seethed. "Your opinion on this ceased to matter when you fucking walked away from me. You have no say, Edward. NONE!"

"Darlin'," Jasper said pulling my attention back to him. "You know that I want nothing more than to make you a vampire so that I can spend eternity loving you but I agree with Edward."

I opened my mouth to argue but he put his fingers to my lips to quiet me.

"Let me explain why before you freak out on me, yes?"

I nodded and he removed his hand.

"You know the drill by now, Bella. You've heard us talk enough times about what being a newborn is like and how they fight. Changing you now wouldn't be helpful in this situation. Maria has too much experience and she could get ahold of you and kill you faster than you would be able to register what was happening. I can't allow that to happen."

I stood up again and began pacing.

"I can't, no I REFUSE, to allow those sadistic bitches to hurt my family and be left with no way to protect any of you. We don't know that I'll be anything like a normal newborn because I have knowledge going into it. I'm already aware of what the change will be like. I know it will be awful and when I wake up things won't look or feel the same, including me. What I also know is that I have a mate that fought alongside the threat that is coming for us now and knows better than anyone how she fights and how to take her down. Jasper, you lived Maria's way of life for decades. You were her right hand and you trained the newborns that decimated huge covens of vampires and wiped out entire cities and you did it when they were brand new to their vampire lives. Do you have so little faith in me that you think I wouldn't be able to learn enough in the next few months to be able to do my part to protect our family?"

"Oh, baby no," Jasper said softly, reaching for me and pulling me back to him. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and kissed my forehead. "I know that when you are turned you will be a force to be reckoned with. How could you not be when you were destined to be mated to someone like me? I don't want your change to be something that is rushed and forced upon you and that's how I see this. Obviously I know that this is ultimately what you want but there were things I know you wanted to do and experience as a human beforehand. I don't want to take that away from you."

I ran my fingers through his hair and leaned my forehead against his, placing a gentle kiss to the tip of his nose.

"Plans change, Jasper. The fact that I am sitting her in your lap instead of Edward's is proof of that. I can still do the things I wanted to do I'll just have to postpone them for a decade or so. The world isn't going anywhere."

"It'll work," Peter said. "I can _feel_ it."

"Of course you can." Edward scoffed.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Peter asked. I looked to him and saw the seething hatred he was directing at Edward. Peter was not a fan of my former boyfriend, that was for sure.

"It means you'll say whatever you think Jasper wants to hear because you're his lap dog. Sitting at his feet begging for scraps of attention and doing whatever he says because you think it makes you more important. I'm not even sure you have an actual gift since your _feelings_ never seem to come to you when it's actually important. You're a fraud."

"EDWARD ANTHONY THAT IS ENOUGH!"

All conversation, movement, and I'm pretty sure time, stopped as Esme's voice sounded through the room like the roar of a lioness. I was afraid to breathe and I curled in on Jasper getting as close to him as I could.

"You are my son and I love you but I have had it up to here with you and your snobby attitude. You have always treated Peter and Charlotte as though they were beneath you and that stops now. They are family just as much as the Denalis are REGARDLESS of their food source. Which, if you hadn't noticed, they CHANGED to make Bella more comfortable around them. The only reason I am not shipping you off to Alaska right now is because we need you here to keep Bella and the rest of this family safe. We will hear no more of your opinions unless you are specifically asked, do you understand me?"

"Yes, ma'am." Edward's head was hanging down and I had to try very hard to stop from giggling at the fact that he was over one hundred years old and had just been scolded like a child.

"Now I won't ask you to apologize because I know you won't mean it but so help me Edward if I hear you talk to any member of this family like that again I will personally remove your tongue and keep it hidden until you learn to speak to people with a bit respect."

"Well that was different," Emmett murmured, effectively breaking the tension in the room.

"Keep breaking her shit and you're going to be on the receiving end of that," Jasper snickered.

I looked to the Volturi vampires, curious to see their reactions to our family's interactions. Marcus and Felix seemed amused while Chelsea and Afton looked confused. I was sure that the Volturi, while calling themselves a family, did not really interact as one.

"As fun as that was to watch," Felix said, "shall we get back to the original conversation regarding Miss Bella being changed? Peter says it will work. Alice can you see anything?"

Her eyes lost focus and she scanned the future. Edward's head snapped up and while he still wasn't thrilled with the idea, when Alice looked at him with an almost evil grin he returned it.

"Oh it will work," Alice answered. "Better than you can imagine."

She looked at me and her smile grew, making it look even more devious.

"I can't wait!"

* * *

 **Leave me some love! :)**


	21. Chapter 21

I stood in Bella's room staring out the window into the night. I was conflicted about the turn of events regarding her change but as her mate it was my job to give her what she wanted and what she wanted was forever. Who was I to argue when I wanted it just as badly as she did.

After Esme's epic freak out on Edward and Alice's revelation that it would all work out there was little resistance from anyone about Bella's decision. I knew what was ahead of me in regards to training her to fight and while I was looking forward to her being less fragile I didn't relish the thought of teaching her how to become a killer. I would need everyone's help due to the fact that neither of us would be able to look at the other as a potential enemy. Having members of the Volturi guard here would be most helpful since my Bella had no relationship to them. It would be easier for her to spar with them than any member of our family.

The only obstacle we had to face came in the form of the Quileute wolves. Our relationship with them was on great terms and I worried that this would be a deal breaker.

"All we can do is ask their permission," Carlisle had said. "If they say no it will be a huge problem. We will have to leave the area and that will leave the people of Forks unprotected from Maria and Victoria. The wolves are strong but they will never be able to protect the town from that many vampires on their own."

"We do not need permission from anyone," Marcus said. "I have not agreed to any treaty so I can be the one to change, Isabella."

I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I wanted to be the one to do it. I wanted it to be _my_ venom running through her veins for the rest of time. I would allow Marcus to do it if that's what Bella truly wanted but it wouldn't be an easy thing to watch.

We still decided that we would discuss it with them. If they didn't have any objections then I would be the one that brought my mate into this immortal life.

I heard my love begin to stir and watched her sleeping refection in the glass of the window. She wasn't waking up, she was dreaming. She moaned quietly and my name fell from her lips like a prayer. I smiled, knowing that she was dreaming about me. Her emotions were telling me that this dream was far from innocent and that just made my smile grow; along with other parts of me. I contemplated waking her so that I could ravage her but I decided against it. In a few day's time she would never sleep again and I wanted her to enjoy it while she could.

"Jasper, Sam is on his way," Alice said.

I sighed and made my way downstairs and out the back door to meet him. I didn't have a good feeling about my upcoming chat with the alpha wolf.

I took a seat on a boulder at the edge of the river than ran behind the house knowing Sam would easily find me by following his nose.

Within a few minutes I heard the sound of massive paws pounding against the forest floor. There was more than one set which I had expected. Even though we were on good, dare I say friendly, terms they still didn't trust us enough to meet with any of us one on one. I should have been more cautious and had someone out here with me. There was potential for this to turn violent given that I was essentially about to ask if they would allow me to kill a human that they were all rather fond of.

The running stopped and a quiet rustling could be heard before Sam and Jacob stepped out of the trees in human form. Of course Jacob would be with him. The universe couldn't have made this even a tiny bit easy by sending one of the wolves that _wasn't_ in love with my mate.

"What's up, leech?" Jacob said as the approached. "News about the red head I hope."

"Actually I do have some new information regarding Victoria and her plans. It seems she has enlisted an old enemy of mine to help her carry out her revenge."

I filled them in on what Alice had seen. They had heard my story before and were aware of the sadistic shit Maria was capable of. They were good actors and outwardly they appeared not to be phased by the added threat but I could feel their concern. I could only assume it was not only for their pack but for their people and the people of Forks as well.

I also filled them in on the development with Marcus and Bella.

"With the threat on her life they'll be sticking around until it's taken care of. Because she's kin, Marcus feels obligated to extend his protection and help eliminate the threat. He's aware of your presence here and is willing to fight alongside you if you're still willing to help."

"Of course we are," Sam replied. "We can't allow a bunch of crazed baby vamps to come into the area and not do what we can to stop them. I'm almost insulted that you think we would abandon this."

"It's because of what I'm about to ask you that I think you might."

Sam looked at me with confusion while Jacob just looked suspicious. He knew what I was going to ask before the words were even out of my mouth.

"I knew this was coming," he said.

Sam looked at him, reading something in his eyes and I watched as the light bulb came on and he realized what Jacob was referring to.

"You want Bella changed." It wasn't a question.

I nodded, preparing myself for an argument but I was met with none.

"As Jake said we knew this was coming. We will not stand in the way of you making Bella one of you. I have spoken to Carlisle on more than one occasion about your bond as mates and it's not unlike what we experience when we imprint. Given that, if you want to get technical, Jake here broke the treaty first by telling Bella the legends of our tribe regarding your kind and you didn't declare war on us it's the least we can do."

"When?" Jacob asked.

"As soon as possible. I appreciate your understanding about this. I hated the idea of doing anything that would have prevented my family from returning to this area in the future."

"So you would have done it even if we had said no?"

"I wouldn't have done it personally but we had a back up plan just in case."

Sam laughed and shook his head. "Why does that not surprise me?"

I just grinned in response.

We stood out by the river for a short while longer and discussed plans for a new training schedule. The wolves were more than ready to take on Victoria but they would have to spend some time around the Volturi vampires, as well as Bella once she was turned, so that they could become acclimated to their scents and not rip them apart by accident. Although if Chelsea or Afton happened to lose a limb or two in the fray I wouldn't be too upset.

Once they left I decided to go on a quick hunt to clear my head. I had been thinking far too much over the last several hours and my brain needed a break from everything. Giving myself over completely to my vampire instincts was the only way I knew how to do that. A small herd of deer was just close enough for me to sense and I took off in their direction. I would have preferred a predator but this hunt wasn't about sating my thirst.

I leaped into a tree and watched the family as they munched on the local flora. I could appreciate the beauty of these creatures and tried to take the time as often as I could to do so. One of the few memories I had of my life as a human was of deer hunting with my father. He was a wealth of knowledge when it came to the practice and I found myself using some of what he had taught me even now.

I leaped gracefully from the tree and swiftly snapped the buck's neck while simultaneously grabbing the doe and doing the same. The two fawns that were with them looked on as I sunk my teeth into their mother's neck but they didn't stick around long. They turned and bolted into the trees before I could swallow my first mouthful of her blood.

I had both deer drained quickly and with my thirst as sated as animal blood would allow, I buried their bodies and headed back to the house. I didn't make it more than a few steps before I realized I was not alone. I looked up and found Marcus sitting on a fallen tree about twenty yards away.

"Marcus," I greeted, bowing my head respectfully.

"None of that," he said waving his hand. "As far as I'm concerned we are now family and there is no need for such displays. Carlisle informed me that you met with the shape shifters while we were out."

"I did," I answered.

"How did that conversation go? Since I did not see any dead bodies on the lawn I assume it went well?"

I chuckled. "They agreed to allow us to go ahead with our plans to change Bella."

"Excellent. This makes the situation much less messy."

I nodded in agreement and waited for him to continue but he remained silent. His emotions were telling me there was more he wanted to say but he was struggling with it. The slight under current of fear running through him had me more than a little intrigued. What could he possibly be afraid of?

"That's obviously not the only reason you came out here, Marcus. We could have discussed this when I returned or you could have gotten this same information from the others. I can feel that whatever it is you have to say is important though I can't understand the fear you're feeling."

He grinned and shook his head. "That part of your gift must be very frustrating, no? To feel what others are feeling but not able to understand the why behind those emotions."

I shrugged. "It can be at times. With Bella especially. That's the only time that I wish I had Edward's gift, not that it would matter with her."

"You are correct in assuming that I have something to discuss with you. Now that permission has been granted to change Bella I know that you will be the one to do it. I would like to ask you, if she is agreeable, to allow me to be the one to make her a vampire. She is my last living descendant and I wish to keep a connection with her. I would like for my venom to change her into what we are just as it was my blood that gave her life to start with."

Again, I didn't know how I was supposed to feel about his request. I understood where he was coming from and I knew that a part of him had hoped the wolves would deny me when I asked their permission. I stood still as a statue for a long while thinking this over but then decided it wasn't even my decision to make.

"I appreciate you coming to me and asking, Marcus but this isn't my decision. Bella is the one that needs to decide who she wants to turn her so my answer is that, whatever she decides, I will honor her wishes."

"Fair enough." he said. "We will speak with her about this when she wakes from her sleep. I do not wish to overwhelm her but the sooner this is done the better."

"I agree."

A few hours later found me lying in bed with my mate, watching as she stretched and opened her eyes to the new day. When her eyes met mine she smiled and curled herself back into my arms nuzzling her face into the crook of my neck.

"Good morning, darlin'."

"Morning," she mumbled against my skin.

"Did you sleep well? I know you were having some good dreams there for awhile."

I felt the heat as that telltale blush of hers made it's appearance. I chuckled quietly and grabbed her chin, pulling her face away from it's hiding place.

"Don't be embarrassed, my Bella. I like knowing that even your subconscious mind wants me as badly as your conscious mind does."

"Every part of me wants you, Jasper. Some more than others when you look at me that way."

I hadn't realized that I was looking at her in any specific way but I was sure my own want and need for her was showing in my eyes. I was old enough to this life to be able to control those baser urges but with her I didn't want to. I wanted to spend days, weeks, showing her with my body just how cherished, adored, and loved she was.

I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers. The kiss was meant to be chaste and sweet but that flew out the window the second our lips made contact. I pried her lips apart with my tongue and delved into the warm recesses of her mouth, her light moan encouraging me to kiss her harder. She fisted her hands in my hair and tugged trying to pull me as close as she could. I rolled her onto her back and allowed a small portion of my weight to rest on her, just enough to allow her to feel that I was there. I slid one hand under her thin tank top, brushing the tips of my fingers teasingly over the skin of her stomach. She jerked and started to giggle and I smiled against her lips.

"That tickles," she said.

"I know," I said as I applied more pressure forcing much louder laughter from her.

She squirmed and tried as hard as she could to get away from my tickle assault but it was futile. When her breathing became labored and she started begging me to stop I relented.

"You are a terrible person," she said as she jumped up and headed toward the bathroom.

"You love me," I said.

"Yes I do but that doesn't mean I like you very much right now. You almost made me pee my pants." She glared at me with her angry kitten face and I turned my head to hide my grin.

"I'll make it up to you later," I told her, waggling my eyebrows.

Once Bella was showered and dressed we headed downstairs to the kitchen. Esme had made her breakfast and I as I sat with her while she ate I regretted my decision to turn our make out session into a tickle fest. Watching the way her lips wrapped around her fork and listening to her moans of appreciation at the taste of the food were making it difficult for me to sit still.

Marcus eventually joined us at the table to chat with Bella as she ate. He wanted to know everything about her so he assaulted her with questions about her life prior to moving to Forks. She seemed all too happy to fill him in on what she continually called her boring life. Eventually she turned the tables and began asking him questions instead. It was amazing to listen to his stories and I found myself just as fascinated as Bella seemed to be to hear about things that happened hundreds of lifetimes before even Carlisle was born.

His emotions turned somber when he started telling Bella about his mate, Didyme. While they spent more years together than her human mind could reconcile it was obvious that the pain of her loss had not lessened over the years. Nor would it ever. He still smiled at the memories he shared with us and spoke her name with such reverence that it was like he was speaking of a deity that should be worshiped. I had no doubt in my mind that that was exactly how he had treated her when she was alive. That was exactly how one's mate should be treated.

"Why did you stay with him?" Bella asked after Marcus told us the story of her demise. "I don't understand how you can look at him every day and resist the urge to set him on fire and dance around the ashes."

"It's not that simple, cara mia. I will always hold a grudge against my brother for ruining my forever. Our relationship has not been the same since that fateful day and no matter how he tries there is just no chance of repairing it. I tried several times over the years to end my own life. To escape this world and join mia amata wherever it is that we go when our lives here on this earth cease. My brothers would not allow it and each attempt was stopped so I gave up trying. Killing him would no doubt bring me great joy and a sense of peace and closure. However, Aro is also mated and Sulpicia is as much my sister as young Alice is yours. I could never be the one to cause her that kind of pain."

Bella nodded and sat quietly allowing all of the information Marcus had given her to sink in. I could see his reasoning for why he had chosen not to retaliate but it simply just showed me how different we were. I would move heaven and hell to avenge my mate if someone took her away from me and I would care little about anyone who go in my way.

"Have you ever thought about leaving Volterra? I mean wouldn't it make it even a little easier if you didn't have to be around him all the time?"

"Leaving the safety of our stronghold is, again, not that simple, Isabella. As with any ruling family, human or otherwise, we have acquired enemies over the centuries. My brothers and I are not afforded time outside the city walls often, and when we do decide to leave, each trip must be planned meticulously and we must travel heavily guarded. Chelsea always travels with us as her gift is invaluable when dealing with hostile vampires that would like to see our heads on spikes."

He didn't elaborate about Chelsea's gift and Bella didn't ask. I was already aware that she had the ability to create false relationships and understood how her gift would be paramount if they happened across anyone wanting to do Marcus harm. She would be able to create a fake bond, forcing the hostile vampire to become loyal to Marcus. Carlisle had told me that he suspected this was how the Volturi retained such large numbers in their guard and I tended to agree. While I respected the Volturi the fact that they kept themselves hidden away in their castle in Volterra instead of venturing out into the world to see how it has changed over the centuries made some of their methods archaic and more than a little unjust. They were judge, jury, and executioner in our world.

"So after this is over I won't get to see you much unless I come to Volterra?" Bella asked.

I held my unneeded breath. The thought of Bella anywhere near Volterra, and Aro, set me on edge in a way that I couldn't even begin to describe. If I had it my way she would never even meet the other two brothers, much less spend any actual time in their presence.

"Now that I know of you, cara mia, I intend to visit you as often as I can. You and your family will always be welcome guests in Volterra but I fear, by the look on young Jasper's face, he worries about you spending time in my home. I must admit I have my own reservations as well."

"Oh?"

He smiled indulgently at her and stroked her cheek with the tips of his fingers. "Don't concern yourself with such things right now. We have more important things to discuss, which brings me to the reason I have come to speak with you this morning. As you are no doubt aware, the wolves have agreed to look the other way and allow you to be changed."

Bella looked to me expectantly with her eyebrow raised.

"Sorry, darlin'. I just haven't had the chance to tell you about my meeting with Sam last night. He said that because Jacob technically broke the treaty first they were willing to allow your change. I'm sure they aren't overly thrilled with the idea but that's to be expected."

"Well this is good. That means that eventually we can come back here. I know how much Esme loves this house."

I reached down and squeezed her hand. My Bella was the most selfless creature I had ever met. Rather than being concerned for her own safety she had been worried that Esme wouldn't be able to return to her favorite home.

"Yes, "Marcus agreed. "Their permission makes this situation much easier to manage as well as allowing us to retain an alliance with them for what is to come. I wonder, cara mia, if you would allow me the honor of being the one to change you. As I have expressed to Jasper, you are my last remaining descendant. As it was my blood that gave you life, I would love nothing more than to have my venom give you eternity. It would mean the world to me to keep that tie, that bond, to you."

Bella looked surprised at his request. She was feeling torn and I knew without having to ask that she was concerned with hurting my feelings if she said yes.

"Don't do that," I told her. "This decision is yours and yours alone, darlin'. While I would love nothing more than to have my venom running through your veins forever I won't be mad or upset if you choose to let Marcus do it instead. He has a good argument and regardless of who "creates" you, you will be a Cullen and my mate. Nothing can change that."

She nodded slowly and gave me a small smile. I squeezed her hand again to reassure her as I projected my feelings to her. I wanted her to know without a doubt that I was being honest with her.

"Can I have some time to think about it?" she asked. "I know we don't have a lot of time."

"You can take as much time as you need," I said.

She nodded and reached up and kissed Marcus's cheek. She then turned to me and pressed a soft kiss to my lips. She stood from her seat and we watched as she washed and dried her breakfast dishes and put them away. The menial task kept her hands busy and she did it slowly but I knew from her emotions that her brain as going a mile a minute. Once that was done she headed up to her room. All that was left for us to do was wait.

* * *

 **A/N: Thank you to those of you that reviewed the last chapter. I was glad to see that I still have some loyal readers after my extended absence. I considered officially putting this story on an indefinite hiatus while I tried to regain my inspiration but it seems as though there was no need. I will be starting the next chapter as soon as this one is posted so look for an update in a week or two (sooner if work stays as slow as it has been). See you then!**


	22. Chapter 22

I closed my book and sat it on the table beside me. I couldn't concentrate. It had been two days and I still hadn't made a decision regarding my change. It shouldn't have been such a difficult choice to make. Jasper was the one I was spending the rest of my existence with. He should be the one to do it. Right? Marcus made a valid argument and I kind of liked the idea of maintaining the familial bond with him be it in blood or venom.

My biggest hang up was the fact that being changed, being bitten, seemed very intimate to me. The more I thought about it the more wrong it seemed to let someone besides Jasper sink their teeth into my neck. I traced my fingers along the pulse point and remembered the feel of Jasper's lips and tongue in that very spot the last time we made love. No, there was no way I could let someone else put their mouth there. Was it possible to inject venom without biting? That was a question I knew only Carlisle could answer so I decided to seek him out and see what he thought.

I found him outside, sitting with Esme in the large swing in the gazebo just enjoying some quiet time together. I smiled at the sight. There were no two people on this earth better matched than the two of them and I considered myself lucky to be able to be a part of the family they had created.

As I moved toward them they both looked up and smiled at me.

"Oh is the self confinement finally over?" Carlisle asked in jest.

"For a little while," I replied with a smirk. "There's actually something I wanted to talk to you about."

"I'll give you some privacy," Esme said as she attempted to get up from her spot.

"No, no. That's not necessary, Esme. It's nothing that requires a secret conversation."

"Well have a seat then," Carlisle said. He scooted over and gestured to the spot he had created on his other side.

I climbed up next to him and he wrapped his arm around me. I took a moment to relish the fatherly embrace. Neither of my parents had ever been very affectionate and that bothered me more than I would ever allow myself to admit. With Carlisle and Esme it was so different. Physically they weren't all that much older than I was but they were more parental than my own had ever been. They offered hugs and affection freely giving me just another thing to add to the long list of reasons I loved them so much.

"What's on your mind?"

He was already aware of the dilemma I had on my hands but he listened patiently as I told the whole story of my conversation with Marcus and Jasper. When I asked about an alternative means to inject the venom he smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

"There is a way. I have a special syringe of my own design that can withstand the destructive properties of our venom for a short amount of time. If you wish for Marcus to be the one to turn you then I can extract venom from him and then inject it into you. It would actually be a much more effective practice than biting. It will allow the venom to be placed directly into your heart and I would imagine the process would move along a bit faster that way."

I was glad that he was able to give me the answer I had hoped for but it still didn't help me with my decision.

"Thank you, Carlisle. Now I just wish I knew who to choose. What do you think I should do?"

"Now that one I have no answer to. This is your decision to make and I want you to remember what Jasper told you the day they discussed this with you. It doesn't matter whose venom changes you. We are your family and Jasper is your mate. We love you like you were our own and nothing will ever change that."

I smiled as his arm tightened, pulling me closer to his side in a one armed hug. I sat with them for awhile longer talking about nothing important, but in the back of my mind I was still thinking everything over trying to make a decision.

The click of a camera caught my attention and when I looked up I saw Alice stuffing her phone back into her pocket.

"Picture perfect moment," she said by way of an explanation.

Esme made room and Alice joined us on the swing where she regaled us with the details of Felix's first vegetarian hunt.

"It was a disaster!" she said with a giggle. "His shirt was shredded and he was just an absolute mess. Oh! And the look on his face when he tasted the deer was priceless. I wish I would have thought to take a picture. He looked like he had just eaten something rotten!"

We all laughed at Felix's expense and I hoped that, if he was listening, he wasn't offended.

My stomach rumbled, reminding all of us of my human needs and we made our way inside. Esme insisted on making something for me as she usually did. I had long since stopped arguing with her. If she wanted to cook for me I would let her since there would be no need for it soon. Alice disappeared mumbling something about buying Felix new clothes and Carlisle took a seat at the breakfast bar in the kitchen and settling in with some medical journal while Esme cooked.

I went in search of my mate. We had spent time together the last two days but it had been mostly in silence. He never once brought up the topic at hand or pushed for me to make a decision. He allowed me the time I needed and I loved him all the more for, once again, knowing what I needed without me having to tell him. We were already so attuned to one another and that just solidified what I already knew. We were fated to be together forever.

I found him in the basement rec room with Emmett and Peter. They were playing a video game that I didn't care to pay any attention to to see what it was. I only had eyes for my man as I walked in and saw the smile on his face and heard the sound of his carefree laughter. These moments were rare and I took the time to appreciate each one when I caught them. Right now it didn't matter that there was a very scorned vampire hell bent on our destruction. It didn't matter that said vampire had enlisted the help of someone that had made Jasper's life hell for decades. All that mattered, in this moment, was time spent with his brothers.

I didn't want to interrupt and I was just about to turn and go back upstairs when my love called to me.

"Hey, baby. Come sit with me."

I smiled and walked over. He opened his arms and I took my seat in his lap. His arms came around me so he could still use his controller and the game on the screen continued. Every so often he would place a kiss on my forehead or my cheek, and each time the fire that raged inside me only for him burned a little brighter.

I laid my head on his shoulder and breathed in his scent. There was nothing in this world that could ease my mind so well. I placed a small kiss on his neck, then another, and another. A soft sound rumbled in his chest. I could feel the vibration and it helped ease me further into a state of relaxation. I moved my head enough that my lips could reach the skin of his chest left exposed by the v-neck shirt he was wearing. My lips ghosted over the skin just enough that he could feel it before I pressed down and kissed him.

"Keep that up and we're gonna give these two a show," he whispered.

His lips brushed my ear as he spoke sending delicious chills down my spine, and goosebumps erupted all over my body. I felt the wetness pool between my thighs and I marveled at how he could turn me on that much that quickly with just the brush of his lips and the sound of his voice.

Before I realized what was happening he was up and running up the stairs with me in his arms. He was lying on top of me ravaging my mouth with his before I even heard the click of the door to my bedroom closing. It had been too long in my opinion since we had been together like this and he was wearing far too many clothes. I pulled his shirt over his head and then set to work on getting his pants undone. Taking my clothes off properly proved to be too time consuming for him and he quite literally ripped them from my body.

I knew there was going to be nothing loving and gentle about our coupling and I was more than ok with that. There would be time for that later.

I finally got his pants undone as he pulled his mouth from mine and began moving them down my neck to my breasts. He left open mouth kisses all over them and ran his tongue around my nipple several times before sucking it into his mouth. I used my feet to pull his pants down, leaving him to kick them off when I could do no more to help.

I felt the tip of his cock rub against my clit as he continued his assault on my breasts but it wasn't enough. I bucked my hips but he pulled away. I tried again with the same result and huffed, frustrated.

Jasper's lips left my breast and he brought them to my ear.

"So frustrated, my love. Is there something you want?"

He reached down and ran his finger through my folds and teasing my entrance, allowing just the tip of his finger to slip inside.

"Tell me what you want, Bella."

"You," I moaned. "I want you."

"You have me, baby. I'm right here.

He slipped the remaining length of his finger inside as far as it would go, rubbing the tip against my g-spot. It felt amazing I wasn't able to stop his name falling from my lips as he massaged that perfect spot, but still I needed more. As much as I loved those talented fingers they weren't what I wanted buried inside me.

"More," I begged wantonly. I could feel my orgasm building and the ability to speak coherently would soon be impossible.

"You have to tell me, Bella. Tell me what you want."

"Your cock," I managed to gasp. "I need your cock inside me."

He smiled like a villain and gave me what I asked for. He pushed into me without a second thought and my orgasm hit almost instantly. I clutched his shoulders so tight I worried my fingers might break.

He didn't stop. His thrusts were hard and fast and his grunts and groans almost made him sound like an animal. His mouth was attached to the skin of my throat; kissing, licking and nipping all over. His hands were grasped tightly onto my hips and I knew there would be bruise but I didn't care. I could feel him everywhere, inside and out, and I basked in the feeling of completeness.

"Fuck, Bella. So tight. I love the way your pussy feels wrapped around my hard cock."

Speech was no longer an option so my loud moan would have to be a sufficient response to his words. It must have been enough because his movements sped up and I could feel myself teetering on the edge. He sensed this and I wanted to scream when he stopped and pulled out. He flipped me over onto my stomach and pulled me up so I was on my knees with my back against his chest.

"Not yet, baby. I want you to cum with me. It feels so much better when we cum together."

I felt him slide back inside me, much more slowly than before. He pushed me forward so my head was laying on the mattress and my ass was up in the air. He grabbed my hips and started thrusting into me again just as hard as before. In this position he was much deeper and I felt my eyes roll up into the back of my head as he started hitting that glorious spot in a new way. It was too much and not enough at the same time.

I held onto my release as long as I could but the way he was fucking me was just too much and I had to let go. I almost screamed as my orgasm rushed over me and I could vaguely recall hearing my name from his mouth as his own release came right after.

I collapsed onto the mattress, my body heaving as I tried to catch my breath. Jasper laid beside me and put his arm around me, his own breaths were coming in rapidly though I knew it wasn't from exertion. In fact, I didn't know why he was always breathing hard after we had sex.

"That was intense," he said.

I could do nothing but nod.

When my breathing slowed and I felt I could speak in complete sentences I asked a question.

"Why does sex make you breath heavy? It's not like you need the air."

He chuckled and kissed the top of my head. "That was random."

I shrugged as I sat up, wrapping the sheet around me to stave off the chill in the room.

"You're right, It has nothing to do with needing air. It's the feelings that go along with being with your mate in such a primal way. It's very difficult to explain. You'll just have to wait until you experience it for yourself to understand."

I tugged on him, so he would lay his head in my lap. He did and I started running my fingers through his hair and scratching his scalp. He closed his eyes and let out a content sigh.

"That feels amazing," he said. "Speaking of your change, are you any closer to making your decision?"

"Not really. On the one hand I'd like to keep a tie to Marcus. I mean you and I have this as a way to stay connected. But on the other hand I don't want you to look at this as a me choosing Marcus over you. Even though you say you'll be fine with whatever choice I make I know somewhere deep down you'll still feel that I've done exactly that."

He said nothing to confirm or deny what I had said so I knew in my heart it was true.

"We could always avoid all of this and have Alice do it. We could call the Denalis and have one of them come down. Or hell we could just all bite you and call it a day."

At those words an idea began to form in my head. I thought back to my conversation with Carlisle and remembered the sad smile he had given me and I knew beyond a shadow of doubt it was because I had not even considered him as an option to be the one to change me. I thought about Alice and how, because she was changed by someone that was long dead and gone, he had no venom bond to anyone that we knew of. I wondered if maybe that bothered her on some level. The longer I thought the more I realized that the answer was right there, clear as day.

"Get dressed," I said excitedly as I ran into my closet to find something to put on.

I grabbed Jasper's hand and flew out of the bedroom, calling to my family as I went. I stumbled on the last few stairs but Jasper's firm grip on my hand kept me upright.

We found everyone gathered in the living room. Seeing all of them together made my heart soar and I knew that my decision was the right one. Alice was bouncing excitedly in her seat next to Felix so I knew she had already seen what I was going to say. The small smile on Edward's face told me that he too was in the know.

Jasper took a seat and when he tried to pull me into his lap I shook my head and continuing standing in front of the large group of vampires.

"I've spent the last two days holed up in my room trying to make a decision about my change that would make everyone happy. I knew that choosing between Jasper and Marcus would cause hurt feelings regardless of what they said. I also realize that others I had not even considered might be hurt by my decision so I've decided I'm not going to make a choice."

"What are they gonna do? Battle to the death?" Emmett asked.

I shook my head and smiled at my brother. "Of course not. My choice is all of them."

"Don't you mean both of them?" Peter asked.

"No, I mean all of them. I want Jasper, Marcus, Carlisle, and Alice to be the ones to make me one of you. We all know the reasons that I'm choosing Marcus. Carlisle, you are the patriarch of my family and you have stepped up and been an amazing father figure to me. Your venom will tie me to the rest of the family. Alice, you have no ties to anyone by venom. Your creator was killed before you awoke to this life and while you are a Cullen through and through I want you to have that link to someone. Who better than your best friend and sister? And of course, Jasper is my mate and deserves to have his venom running through my veins which will also tie me to Peter and Charlotte. I've always wanted a huge family and I've gotten that with all of you. I feel like it's only right that I have a piece of all of the people that have given me that."

Alice was the first to react. She jumped from her seat and barreled into me, wrapping her arms around my neck. She was squealing but her eyes shone with venom tears.

"I love you so much, Bella! I would love nothing more than to be a part of this!"

I squeezed her back as hard as I could. Carlisle reached out and grabbed my hand.

"Thank you, Bella. I'm honored."

There were no tears but his voice quivered with emotion.

"Wait," Peter said. "While I think it's cool that Bella wants this, Jasper are you ok with all of these people marking your mate?"

Before Jasper had a chance to respond Carlisle spoke up.

"There will be no marks as we will not be biting her. We will combine our venom into a syringe and it will be injected into her heart."

"Even if that wasn't the case I'd be ok with the marks," Jasper said. "Love bites."

He smiled at me and I took my seat in his lap and curled into him. I was beyond relieved that he seemed ok with my solution. It didn't occur to me until after the words were out of my mouth that I should have discussed it with him first.

"Are you really ok with this?" I asked him quietly.

"I really am, darlin'. I think you came up with an amazing solution to the problem. There is just one thing though."

"What?"

"I _will_ be biting you." He leaned in and playfully nipped at my neck causing me to giggle.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

* * *

 **So some lemony goodness and a decision. What do we think of Bella's choice? As always, thank you to everyone that reviewed the last chapter and for the new favorites and follows. You guys are awesome! I'm starting a new job this week and the hours are crazy so I will do my best to get another chapter out in the next two weeks. I plan to spend the rest of my weekend writing so I can get ahead. Leave me some love and I'll see ya soon!**


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